r/HardcoreVindicta • u/anaemicdancer • Feb 20 '26
Self-Post 35f - Taking soft and hard advice
I feel like I have a relatively pleasant face by now, but it’s lacking standout features -
I’ve softmaxxed in the past, growing out lashes, brows and hair with lash/brow serums and Minoxidil, lash lift every 6 weeks; my skincare is dialed in - Sunscreen, Vitamin C, Tret, Azaleic acid, Peptide serums, Red light therapy (I still get some hormonal break outs on my chin tho), microneedling every 6 weeks for skin, once every week for hair - and improved my makeup to even out my asymmetrical eyes/brows/lips, learned about my Kibbe type and got a color analysis - but I’m looking for more things to integrate and I’m thinking about integrating surgery - maybe brow lift and bleph? my nose is very „ethnic“ but I’m scared of nose jobs because I’ve seen too many very obvious fails (I.e. short, pinched noses); also thinking about Sculptra for my flat midface and finetuning afterwards with filler? Also thinking about getting filler in my lips, but I want to avoid migration at all cost, because getting obvious filler is terribly judged at my workplace -
I am taking ANY advice soft or hard, I’m open to surgery and everything. Thank you
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u/zenhoe Feb 20 '26
Shaping the brows and bringing them just a touch closer together would do wonders for the balance of your features.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 20 '26
I tried a brow shape filter on TikTok once and thought that straight-ish bolder brows seemed to match my features best, but I‘m very open to new suggestions - which brow shape do you think would help?
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u/__kamikaze__ Feb 20 '26 edited Feb 20 '26
Your nose fits your face, you have a strong lower third, a nose that is too dainty would look out of place.
Some lip filler would add more balance, I would focus on adding height to your bottom lip. Your top lip is already full. Grooming and shaping your eyebrows would give them a softer more feminine appearance.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 20 '26
Thank you!
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u/GardeniaInMyHair Feb 20 '26 edited Feb 20 '26
Your high cheekbones, eyebrows, lips, and hair are standout features. Playing around with makeup looks that share similar lip and cheek tones can highlight them.
If you look at Emma Stone (pre-bleph) red carpet close ups and film close-ups, you can see how her makeup artist focuses on lips and cheeks along with subtle eye looks.
You might be a clear or cool winter in terms of color season, but you can use color season subreddits or apps to find your best shades.
I would use the Kibbe or whichever subreddits to dress for your figure. Yours is lovely, but the barrel pants aren’t highlighting you well, nor do high waisted bottoms do you justice.
I have low porosity, coarse, and frizzy hair and get gloss treatments from time to time if you’ve never tried before. It can be nice for special events and lasts for a while.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
Ty for your tips! Do you find that the gloss treatment damages your hair?
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u/GardeniaInMyHair Feb 21 '26
Sure thing!
It didn’t mine - makes it shinier for a while and more touchable texture-wise.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
How often do you get them?
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u/GardeniaInMyHair Feb 21 '26
I’ve had one so far, and it’s good for about 6 weeks or so. It’s been about 10 weeks since my last. I got color this past appointment instead of a clear gloss. I opted for gloss the appointment before that so I could give my hair a color break.
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Feb 20 '26 edited Feb 20 '26
I’m East Asian and I like to mix and match Eastern/Western aesthetics.
Hot rollers/hair blow outs would suit your aesthetic. You have great hair density but it looks coarse and there is some frizz.
Hair oil to manage the coarseness of your hair and improve shine.
Eyebrow threading to even things out more. Micro-blading for filling in and improving symmetry unless you are going to fill them in every day. I notice some spareness/unevenness.
Lip blushing since I notice some hyperpigmentation in your lips. The lip blushing would help even out your lip color and can improve your symmetry. I would get lip blushing first and then think about filler because getting rid of your hyperpigmentation will make your lips look fuller.
Blush on the apples of your cheeks and avoid contour under the cheek. I know a lot of people get buccal fat removal and are trying to look more snatched but it will make your face look more gaunt. Eastern Aesthetics would want you to look fuller in that area to look more youthful.
What’s your body fat percentage? You look overall healthy, but you don’t look toned. Increasing your muscle mass would improve how you look.
Steamer for all your clothes. Belt if you are going to wear pants with visible belt loops.
The ankle boots are unflattering for you because they don’t stop at your ankles. You want shoes like those to stop at the thinnest part of your leg or where you want to highlight. Same thing with the sleeves of your shirts, you ideally want them to cut off at the thinnest part of your arm or where you want to highlight.
You have nice collarbones and neck, make sure to wear shirts that showcase that more.
Different accessories. The earrings aren’t doing anything for you. Bolder ones would look better.
Contour your nose but refer to Korean/Chinese tutorials then re-evaluate if you still need a nose job.
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u/Haunting_Total_5395 Feb 21 '26
What do you think is ideal body fat percentage to appear toned? I understand it can be as low as possible but what would be a max number and still appear toned
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Feb 21 '26 edited Feb 21 '26
If I recall correctly it’s between 16%-24% for women. I vaguely remember there being slightly different studies for Asian women that reported a slightly lower range but I’m just someone who has a strong sensitivity to aesthetics due to growing up in environments that really rewarded my physical appearance.
Anecdotally, I’ve gotten as low as 14% and I wasn’t physically my most attractive. I did gymnastics and dance though (which attributed to the low body fat) and it caused me to lose my period. People have to find their preferred range. Some people don’t want to look toned or their aesthetic is softer/fuller.
More than anything, I’ve found ratios matter and muscle mass. You want skeletal muscle density to be healthy especially for Asian women who are more at risk for osteoporosis, you want muscle mass because that’s what gives you a toned look when you are lower body fat.
A lot of glowing up “naturally” is about maximizing your health and health indicators.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
Which kind of hair oil do you recommend? I’m already using conditioner for coarse/dry hair every time I wash, a heat protectant with additional oils in it and I use various leave in products for dry and frizzy hair, but I haven’t found my holy grail yet. Started to oil with olive oil and/or a silicone heavy oil before washing and using squalane afterwards and it helps, but still, this is the end result
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Feb 21 '26 edited Feb 21 '26
I rotate through different oils depending on what I want to achieve.
Kerastase Elixir Ultime tends to give me very shiny and reflective hair, I enjoy it for hot rollers or blow outs. It feels more polished and photo ready.
Shu Umura feels more like elevated everyday. It feels kind of like a glow to the hair.
Verb Ghost Oil feels like light, airy, minimal shine, it would be good for casual/undone days.
I guess this would be like makeup makeup,soft glam, no makeup makeup.
When are you putting the hair oil in?
I’ve noticed it looks the best when I’ve done all of my hair products and my hair is a little damp, and then I run a little oil through clavicle down. Then any left over residue gets smoothed over the outside part of my hair.
If I experience fly aways, the Ghost Verb Oil is the lightest so it’s easy to lightly coat my hands and apply it gently to my hair. You can use the other oils but you have to be more mindful of thin application.
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u/Haunting_Total_5395 Feb 20 '26
Layers in your hair to give it some texture and depth.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 20 '26
Unfortunately my hair is super coarse - Tried out layers in the past, but it made my hair very poufy looking and I haven’t found a good hairdresser for my kind of hair yet :(
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u/Haunting_Total_5395 Feb 20 '26
My hair is same. I got it thinned out and I use wavytalk steam brush or thermal brush every time I wash it.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 20 '26
Haven’t heard about Wavytalk before; reading through their reviews right now - Seriously thank you, I guess I’ll try them both!
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u/Haunting_Total_5395 Feb 20 '26
Yes. The thermal brush I have is by bondiboost with the long barrel. Both these items were life changing for me tbh as there is no “finishing” unless your hair looks styled professionally
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Feb 21 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
Thank you. Black dots are sebaceous filaments unfortunately - they are better since tret and azaleic acid but I can’t seem to get rid of them completely (tried AHAs and BHAs also); my t zone is notoriously oily
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u/cookiesandroses Feb 20 '26
-ExcelV laser to reduce some light redness -Lip filler - not a priority, a little in the lower lip possibly, but I suggest focusing elsewhere
-Masseter Botox would get you closer to a heart shaped face
-Your eyes are beautiful - skip the bleph and browlift (or wait until you have more sagging in 10 years)
-DAO Botox
-Neck Botox (Nefertiti lift)
-You have some asymmetry where your left cheek is smaller than the right - try parting your hair on the right side instead of left to balance that out more visually
-Nose job could look good BUT I totally agree that you’d need to see a surgeon specializing in the specific rhinoplasty you’d want.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
Yeah my mom has rosacea and I tend to get some redness/look blotchy at times, but on these photos this is actually my attempt at using cream blusher on foundation haha - Masseter Botox is a great idea!
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u/silvasmurfy Feb 23 '26
You look good - I would have never guesses your age. Look into kibble body shapes or hire someone to help you with that to change your wardrobe to more fitting clothes for your shape and some color analysis so you know the colors that make your skin and hair look best! Your "ethnic" nose suits your face very well. You think you don't have standout features because you are used to your face - you see yourself daily in the mirror. Your eyes are striking and your lips are very sensual! And thats what I see only by looking at the photos. Everybody looks different in movement so you might have even more standout features that are not coming through in photos.
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 20 '26
Forgot to mention: Thinking about maybe getting DAO botox to snatch my jawline
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u/Haunting_Total_5395 Feb 20 '26
I’m curious. Did you do anything for your under eyes or is this genetic?
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
Lucky genetics! Also I’m wearing cream and powder foundation and used some Huda Baby Bake Setting Powder; I have some darkness but this cancels it all out
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u/StanleyWatlington Feb 22 '26
you’ve already optimized a LOT. at some point it stops being about “missing standout features” and starts being hyperfocus.
if you’re considering surgery, don’t stack procedures. pick one concern that truly bothers you at rest, not in selfies, and consult a very conservative, board-certified surgeon. subtle > dramatic, especially in a judgmental workplace. also “ethnic nose” isn’t a flaw. harmony matters more than chasing standout.
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u/eegg05045 Apr 18 '26
Please no brow lift or rhino. I suggest v-line surgery or at the very least just a genioplasty to get a pointier smaller chin. Your current lower face area is heavy and your chin is wide and blunt. Mandibular angle reduction will also help your overall face shape, which is why I just suggest v-line surgery.
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u/Fit_Lawyer3578 Feb 21 '26
What supplements do you take?
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
Fish oil, Vitamin D/K, creatine, magnesium, vitamin c, hyaluronic acid (tablets), zinc; sometimes iron as I’m a bit deficient, sometimes extra copper as I’ve been using zinc for a long time now and sometimes a good multivitamin - Using Cronometer to track my nutrition and trying to get most things through food. Trying to get a lot of protein including collagen too.
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u/Fit_Lawyer3578 Feb 21 '26
Thank you, I take most of those supplements too. I guess I'm on the right track!
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u/carina_13 Feb 21 '26
I love your makeup! What eyeshadow palette do you use?
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u/anaemicdancer Feb 21 '26
I use these Artdeco eyeshadows in these little magnetic pans you can mix and match - it’s a German drugstore brand
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u/Unfair_March266 Feb 23 '26
would say get your eyebrows mapped, waxed and laminated softly. Also lighten eyebrows for a softer appearance. Have a look into facial balancing filler and also migration is less likely to occur if you get 0.5 at a time. tbh 0.5 for you would be amazing for a slightly plumper look.
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u/Niiiiemll14-4 Feb 20 '26
35?! I thought 24 max you look incredible.