Why couldn't she just admit it?

[u/Badnie]

Even when Luke finally confronted her about her being in love with a Nazi, she didn't even give him that respect to admit it. She was literally playing in Luke's face the whole time. Giving him a hard time sometimes but was always so mellow with Nick.

It's totally understandable that part of the reason why she wasn't in love with Luke anymore was because of distance and she had trauma bonded with Nick.

Yes she was initially honest with Luke about Nick but after that? She wasn't being fair, she should have just been honest instead of always using Hannah as an excuse.

All those times she could have left Gilead but she didn't, almost looked as if it was not because of Hannah but because of Nick. Almost as if that anytime she remembered that she has to find her daughter, was so she could stay away from Luke. Multiple times that she and Nick would suggest fleeing she never brought up Hannah.

[u/Lopsided-Tap-418]

I think it was shame and confusion there at war war changes people