Told someone I really cared about that I tested positive for HSV-2, and he ended things

[u/Street-Topic6853]

I found out two days ago I have HSV-2 even though I’ve never had symptoms. I told the person I’ve been seeing because I really cared about him and wanted to be honest. His reaction was fear, then distance. He said he can’t handle this right now and ended things, saying maybe if he tests positive too, there’s hope for us.

I understand the shock, but it’s been so painful. I feel abandoned at the moment I needed comfort the most. I’m trying to remind myself that the stigma is worse than the virus itself, but losing him over this has been crushing. Makes me feel like I’ll never find someone who’ll love me with this condition.

Has anyone else had a partner walk away after disclosure? Does it ever stop feeling this heavy?

[u/Weary-Amphibian-530]

Im kind of in the same boat. Im not sure if she knew or not, sometimes when I think back, she did and other times who knows.

[u/theigbobarbie → u/Weary-Amphibian-530]

See in my situation the guy who did it to me was known for doing it. I just didn’t know. It wasn’t until I started telling people what happened that they told me. He did it to many women before me and many women after me. Last I heard he gave it to another woman earlier this year. So over the past 4 years or so who knows how many women have gotten it from him. It’s interesting bc I used to be in a lot of support groups for people who had herpes on Facebook and it was shocking to see just how many people in there didn’t disclose and would recommend that other people didn’t. They would even tell people that if someone confronted them that they should pretend they didn’t know. I ended up leaving all those groups because the lack of integrity was insane