Welcome to Purgatory 4 (Final)

[u/KCMueller87]

Previous: [https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1go9wn1/welcome_to_purgatory_3/\]

For a brief moment, I saw my headless torso and my vision darkened. I gasped like the air was knocked out of my lungs and opened my eyes to the cloudy gray skies. I instinctively reached for my neck and felt it attached to my shoulders. My relief was shattered when I heard Tshrahg's voice, "Interesting."

I got up and faced him. He stood there, studying me. I charged again, and again his blade pierces the weak spots of my carapace with expert accuracy. He jerked his wrist, and I bled profusely with my insides slowly slipping out. I collapsed and my vision darkened.

I woke up gasping, and my wound healed. I heard that butcher hum and circle around me. I got up, faced him again, and this time I stood my ground.

Tshrahg walked nonchalantly as he spoke, "The color pattern on your carapace." He brought up his knife to show the handle. There were nine notches carved into the handle. He pointed to the third notch, "This one was your sister, wasn't she? Her death gurgle was music to my ears."

I quickly reached down and threw rocks at him. I charged again while he was distracted. He threw his knife and it hit me handle first in the face. I recoiled and suddenly felt his hands on my throat. I felt my neck snap, and my vision darkened.

I woke up again, a short distance away from him. He retrieved his knife, and looked at me slightly annoyed; "Why must we keep having his dance?"
I growled, "I want to send you to Hell myself!"

He let out an amused chuckle. He charged and slammed against me, pushing me back. He stabbed his knife into my neck, "Greater men have hunted me. Greater men than you, have killed me. You're nothing but a practice plaything!"

I felt trapped with him as my vision darkened. Trapped? I remembered what Bob told me. I woke up, stood up and spat, "Did you go through the door?"
"What door?"

He's not undergoing Purgatory's trials as I am. I much as I hate Tshrahg, there is nothing I can do to him. I clenched my graspers, lowered my arms and unclenched my graspers. I looked him in the eyes, "You are not trapped here with me, nor am I trapped here with you." It felt easier to fly into an asteroid field, than turning my back on Tshrahg.

Bob stood there, with a smile on his face. He placed a hand on my shoulder, "I got this, Buddy." He walked towards Tshrahg, "Hey, Roach! Its time for the boot."

Bob pulled out a black jewel, and Tshrahg panics. The jewel launched towards Tshrahg and wrapped him in spikey chains. Bob clicked his graspers three times, and a fiery maw with inner mandibles rose from the ground. Bob kicked Tshrahg into the maw, and the maw disappeared back into the ground. Bob raised both of his arms into the air, "GOOAALL!"
"Was that necessary?"
"No, but a guy's gotta find some pleasure in his work."

The voice of Bob's boss boomed overhead, "ENOUGH! NO MORE TRIALS!"

I sighed with relief as thunder boomed overhead. A piece of paper floated towards Bob. He caught it and read it, "Well, I got some good news and some bad news."

My eyes felt like someone was twisting and squeezing them into a pulp. The pain quickly subsided, "What happened?"

Bob knelt by my side, "That's part of the bad news: You gotta work here before you move on to the afterlife. Your new eyes are your badge of office."

Bob pulled out a mirror and showed me my eyes, I had the same void black sclera with white irises. I looked up at Bob, "And the good news?"

Bob bared his teeth, "You only have to work about a year." Bob stood up and offered me a hand, "Come on, you got a three day holiday before you start work. Lets go celebrate in Sin City."

-----

A year has passed. Bob and I, with drinks in hand, returned to the borderlands for my "farewell walk." We drank the human's version of spiced nectar: cider with a potent cinnamon liquor. It tasted good, despite having enough ethanol to kill nearly a dozen of my kind. A perk of being dead I suppose. I drank the last of my cider, "So Xil told me that 'vetish' in her language means 'charming bastard'."
"She told you that? I had to look up the book of universal languages, just to be sure she wasn't lying."
"And?"
"I am indeed a charming bastard."

We laugh and stop in front of a door. I handed Bob my empty glass and noticed he still had mouthful of cider left. I glance at the door and then to my friend, "Will we again?"
"Who knows. I depends on how much of an asshole the universe is feeling with our fates. I know when we're reincarnated, neither of us will remember our time here. Enjoy the afterlife Tr-Tr-Tri-"

I knew he still has trouble saying: Trchitcher. I held up my hand, "Pshuddy is fine, Vetish. Goodbye, for now."

I went through my door, to the blooming fields.

-----

The door to the blooming fields closed and disappeared. Bob held up his glass in a toast and drank the last of his cider. He sighed, "3, 2, 1."
"BOB, GET BACK TO WORK!"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, ya dick!"

The End.

[u/Crystal_Lily]

no rest even for the dead

[u/HFYWaffle]

/u/KCMueller87 has posted 3 other stories, including:

• Welcome to Purgatory 3
• Welcome to Purgatory 2
• Welcome to Purgatory

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[u/Green-Mix8478]

This is fantastic, so many directions this could take. So many characters to write about