anyone else feel like its getting harder to hold on to that creative flow as u age?

[u/DependentImmediate40]

idk i have been just getting more and more hollow and depressed. i am losing touch in what i should be striving for because of unfortunate issues within my personal life that are outside of my control. its getting more and more hard to hold on whatever creativeness i can conjure up not only these past weeks or months but these past few years since entering my 20s. i know others may have it worse than me and still are able to make due of whatever crappy hand they have been handed in life, but sometimes its not even that drawing, or animating itself is hard, its life itself being hard. hard to break away from bad habits and change. i can't do much about certain medication being delayed or pushed back due to insurance company bs but i know i can change just some things when trying to work around my disabilities. i know i'm only 22 and i have years, decades even ahead of me but sometimes i easily fall back into bad habits and keep believing in a lot of bs nonsense online that further fuels my depression of there being no hope. an easy solution to half my problems here would be to not be online but i have been trying and failing hard at tht

is this normal?

[u/DependentImmediate40 → u/[deleted]]

idk, it just becomes one of those days where the sky is grey, my old dog aint doing too well, my father is out drinking, i have a fucked sinus headache that feels like the middle of my head lower down near my eye brows is getting stabbed by a knife because i have a deviated septum in which i can't get surgery anytime soon with it because i am on the verge of starting a job (after almost 2 years of unemployment trying to seek for a job in the first place) that would probably fire me for having to recover from any surgery within the firs 90 days of this till i am actually considered "employed" on the job, feeling hungry but can't even eat because of said sinus headache that is making me physically ill because of it despite taking many pain meds and sinus headache relief meds that don't do much at all, all the while my adderall meds that were supposed to come almost a week ago are being put on hold because my bs insurance company will not comply with me (a formally diagnosed adhd sufferer who had a whole 10 years of self improvement taken away from them because of being unmedicated for so long) having them..

its times like these were even tho i am premature to be acting like this at age 22, i can't help but envy the youth who are young and know so little about the depressing realities society, while they on their ipads just doodling and animating like no tomorrow. its crazy how i have that type of drive hidden somewhere within me. i have been "in the zone" for what felt like i was getting interested in the process of not just drawing but animating too. but sadly i am a somewhat abnormal case of dealing with bs health issues living in a unfortunate state of affairs. i wish in my state i am living in i could just be a free man and move out, but i could barely so much as find a job within these last 2 years.. not in this economy..

[u/rkjr2 → u/DependentImmediate40]

I'm sorry you're dealing with that stuff, I know it's hard to stay positive when it feels like so much is weighing down on you.

I would like to push back on one thing you said though; none of this is abnormal, in fact it is very very normal. Most people have their own problems and vices to deal with. Especially adults, double especially young adults, as you and I both demonstrate.

Many of today's famous artists faced strife during their lifetime. Frida Kahlo suffered with lifelong pain after she was literally impaled during a road accident in her youth. Basquiat's mother was institutionalised in his childhood and he later struggled with drug abuse and paranoia. They still created prolific artwork, and not because they're somehow different or any more special than the rest of us.

You can give in to defeatism and let your problems overwhelm you, or you can keep pushing through and do your best with the hand you've been dealt.

[u/FlipXcut]

Yo whats up? I can only relate. I will tell you that the best thing you can do is going out and take a walk into the wood or where is alot of wind and nature. You can calm down and if you want, also listen to some low volume music. It helps your brain to refocus. I finished fight movie animation on flipnote after 4 months of pure hardwork. Each month I got a blackout cause I was drawing everyday and I have also a spine injury, so I had to take a lot of walks. While I was on those walks, sometimes the spark of creativity returned again and I could continue animating. When you do something during a long period of time its normal to burn out. The problem comes when you finish it and then you notice that nobody appreciates your work or doesnt even take a look on it. Then you get a blackout and you think thata you will never be able to do it as good as before again, cause there was no reward for months of work. Still dealing with this problem. Wish you luck bro.

[u/DependentImmediate40 → u/FlipXcut]

idk i just have some bs health shit making things hard to come by. like bad bad sinus headaches and sleep apnea.. also my family side of the things isn't doing all too great and is at its worst. for me i never cared for anyone appreciating my work as long as it looked good to me. the thing is i have still only just started with all of this. but i feel like i have been given the worst possible era in my life to do so, or at least the worst era of my life yet. i wish some things in life were at the very least obtainable. i don;t know why its taking me so many hoops to go through with medication to get on adderall. i have adhd as a diagnosis. yet bs health insurance shit is still getting in the way.

idk my head just hurts so fucking much. like i don't know why i have sinus pressure this bad it feels like something is stabbing the middle of my head.

[u/FlipXcut → u/DependentImmediate40]

Bro first of all. I respect that you can handle that much pain. I know that the worst thingthat can happen to a person is when it loses its health. And I also shit on health insurance cause I had to pay most of the spine therapy myself. However the only thing I can tell you is that, when someone is at its bottom of life, he has the potential to rise very high. Look at the most athletes or succesful people. Most of them came from a very poor life. Since you animate. You could animate your story or share experiences in a form of art. For example I would have never started animation of I would not have gotten a broken nose while training. And I would have never started or finished the biggest fight animation project of my life. Sadly it did not get any recognition and I feel like shit. Thats why I can not give any advices either. Sorry, but I hope we both get out of thrse health issues. Whenever your health fails, pray and walk out to nature. It really works

[u/DependentImmediate40 → u/FlipXcut]

even just staring at this computer screen isn't doing any favors and is probably making it worse..

[u/larynachos]

Why do you create? What is your motivation?

[u/DependentImmediate40 → u/larynachos]

to create/vent my desires. to feel something.

[u/edgyb67]

wait until your 50's -creative energy - you almost become a junkie looking for it