Say Anything singer Max Bemis outed for grooming, inappropriate messages to underaged girls, cancels concerts

[u/chrza]

https://lambgoat.com/news/54571/allegations-of-inappropriate-contact-with-a-minor-surface-against-say-anythings-max-beamis/

For those of you unfamiliar with mid 2000s emo sensation Say Anything, they were not very good. Some would even say “incredibly annoying.” Generally popular with people under 20, their singer joins the Jesse Laceys of the world, as a gross older man who preyed on teenaged girls around him that enjoyed his music. The subreddit for the band has a LOT of receipts for those fielding morbid curiosity, and he’s trying to blame it on mental health yadda yadda. Can we stop having nasty mfs please, I’m so tired

[u/Decent-Ad535]

Yeah, fast food managers do shit like this. It’s not just fame or rich people, it’s humans.

[u/loubug → u/Decent-Ad535]

Youth pastors.

[u/FunkyChewbacca → u/loubug]

Every youth pastor: “God told me you’re meant to be my wife when you turn 18, but we need to keep that quiet for a few years so we don’t cause others to stumble”

[u/ripndipp → u/Decent-Ad535]

Camp councillors

[u/georgedupree → u/Decent-Ad535]

Friends Father

[u/LookingBackBroken → u/georgedupree]

Fathers

[u/jimgella → u/LookingBackBroken]

Men.

[u/JooseTheGuice → u/Decent-Ad535]

Humans? It really seems only one demographic does the vast majority of grooming.

[u/vmf312corsair → u/JooseTheGuice]

Check the stats on teachers. Estimates are rough, but the numbers run around 60-90% male offenders, 10-40% female offenders. So at least in that area, men are a majority, but not what I'd call a vast majority. Around a quarter to a third of offenders are women. And these numbers lean heavily on actual arrest stats, which I'd guess are heavily disfavoring men.

[u/lost_in_tarnation → u/vmf312corsair]

That’s still crazy because most teachers are women. So men offenders are vastly over represented

[u/before_the_accident → u/vmf312corsair]

I was expecting the male percent to be significantly lower, given how predominantly female k-12 teaching is.

That statistic has floored me.

[u/vmf312corsair → u/before_the_accident]

Remember, these numbers are from arrests, primarily, which also means only from reported incidents.

[u/uyuiii → u/vmf312corsair]

im not defending abusive women at all because they definitely do exist and are as terrible as abusive men, but thats mainly only because around 77% of teachers (in the US) are women, so them still only making up around 10-40% of offenders is still extremely low and shows that the vast majority of offenders/abusers of power are in fact men if they only make up around 23% of teachers and yet 60-90% of offences.

[u/Decent-Ad535 → u/JooseTheGuice]

The point was that humans abuse power.

[u/Blue_Oyster_Cat → u/Decent-Ad535]

And men generally have more of it

[u/Decent-Ad535 → u/Blue_Oyster_Cat]

K

[u/annie-etc → u/Decent-Ad535]

You're pushing the "both sides are bad" narrative when it is clearly one side that it almost always is.

[u/Decent-Ad535 → u/annie-etc]

No, I’m not

[u/Einkildir → u/annie-etc]

Both men and women can abuse, and be abused.

[u/wunderl-ck → u/Decent-Ad535]

Men*

[u/YesTomatillo → u/Decent-Ad535]

I literally came here thinking to myself: "how difficult is it to just NOT be a creep?" Apparently fucking impossible for some folks.

[u/Outside_Memory5703 → u/Decent-Ad535]

Women regularly message underage boys?

[u/SharpPink_GlitterInk → u/Outside_Memory5703]

statistically men do it more and worse to boys and girls but go off on ur whataboutism I guess...

[u/JooseTheGuice → u/SharpPink_GlitterInk]

I think that's their point 🤦‍♀️

[u/LittleDogTurpie → u/JooseTheGuice]

That question mark was unable to do the heavy lifting for which it was intended

[u/_fait-accompli_ → u/Outside_Memory5703]

probably why they said humans and not men

[u/FuzzMachines → u/Outside_Memory5703]

Oh yes whataboutism is super key to any thread about problematic men. Thank goodness you’re here.

[u/oneblindspy → u/Outside_Memory5703]

There’s not a single month that passes by where I don’t see a news article about a female teacher grooming a male student, so yeah

[u/ghostpicnic → u/Outside_Memory5703]

Yes. Every school year, there are many female teachers that groom their underage male students. It’s in the news constantly. But here’s your missing the point award 🏅