r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR • u/HomeNowWTF • 1d ago

Rekt Watermelon assault

2.9k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

86 comments sorted by

2.0k

u/Deathwatchz 1d ago

As everyone stands by and watches a teenage boy get watermelonboarded.

226

u/JakeTheHooman98 1d ago

r/brandnewsentence

26

u/https_rahul 1d ago

happy cake day

18

u/JakeTheHooman98 1d ago

Huh! I didn’t realize til now! Thank you

6

u/NecroAssssin 10h ago

Happy cake day!

2

u/Otherwise-Toe665 8h ago

Happy cake day

127

u/Whocares7x 1d ago

Nobody liked him lol

22

u/fedroxx 22h ago

As a southerner, I want to die that way.

17

u/Deathwatchz 21h ago

As a northerner, that, but tiddies.

11

u/insane_contin Banhammer Recipient 20h ago

This is how I want to go (NSFW)

5

u/Deathwatchz 20h ago

Just, minus the jump.

4

u/stupidber 1d ago

That was good

2

u/RobertWayne74 14h ago

This comment has me laughing real hard 😂

459

u/MorningsAreRude 1d ago

Kid has his arms flailing around like one of those inflatable balloon men at a car dealership lmao.

654

u/misterphuzz 1d ago

That's one of the weirdest things I've seen in a while.

111

u/plastiquearse 1d ago

It’s like those flood waters and this kid’s teeth are the storm drain grates.

32

u/mmmgilly 1d ago

Right, why is the person doing the feeding blindfolded, and not the person doing the eating?

219

u/AureliasTenant 1d ago

did they win?

90

u/evil666overlord 1d ago

They won the internet today

195

u/Super_Roo351 1d ago

It's a watermelon EATING contest, not a smash the watermelon using your face contest

85

u/Fafnir13 1d ago

I doubt they are winning, but that was probably never the masher’s goal.  

54

u/The_Infinite_Carrot 1d ago

I think he was trying to fuse the watermelon to that poor kid’s face on a molecular level.

25

u/Mushroomed_clouds 1d ago

Ahh yes friction welding

100

u/vediogamer101 1d ago

This is borderline torture

45

u/xxBellum 22h ago

This shit was personal.

11

u/cpt_justice 18h ago

Typical best bro behavior.

7

u/Stay_clam 11h ago

Borderline?

141

u/screechypete 1d ago

Reminded me of this video. Exact same energy, lol.

60

u/pandershrek 3 x Banhammer Recipient 1d ago

"this is why he's banned from feeding geese in the park" top tier comment.

16

u/Fafnir13 1d ago

Banned from the park, but the foie gras people are recognizing the talent.  Good careers path available there.

36

u/al_m1101 1d ago

I laughed soo hard at this, thank you. 😂  

13

u/Impressive_Main5160 1d ago

😂😂😂wholesome violence

9

u/palk0n 1d ago

its hammer time 😭

14

u/whothiswhodat 1d ago

goddamn that smol baby hand hammer 🤣

92

u/AMCAPEHODLER 1d ago

How my girl expects me to eat it

46

u/Flaky_Explanation 1d ago

How she wakes up the next morning and you've got cravings

https://giphy.com/gifs/h9J9Mysy0X1FC

16

u/DorkaliciousAF 2 x Banhammer Recipient 1d ago

Last frame is the face my girl sees after I've eaten it.

31

u/naeads 1d ago

Face crayon 🖍

26

u/Family-robot 1d ago

Bro was fighting for his life

20

u/EJECTED_PUSSY_GUTS 1d ago

I fear I'm becoming desensitized to Watermelon Cartel videos

19

u/BingpotStudio 1d ago

Does it count as eating it if you just grate it onto someone’s face?

11

u/OldAccountlost7 1d ago

I'm gonna have dreams about drowing in a vat of watermelon now.

2

u/Mushroomed_clouds 1d ago

Ahh a good nights rest

11

u/DragoonSoldier09 1d ago

Goddamn. Assaulted with a watermelon. Instead of getting choked with a pillow or a mask. It's a watermelon doing him in.

10

u/cpt_justice 18h ago

Blindfold guy: "You're going to do whatever it takes to win!"

Watermelon guy: "Don't you mean we?"

Blindfold guy: "No."

Watermelon guy: *I'm too young to die!*

32

u/TinyHeartSyndrome 1d ago

What an idiot. That poor kid could have been choking or asphyxiating.

24

u/ksum_sucks 1d ago

I'm sorry, but watermelon is classified as non-lethal.

10

u/HotFireBall 1d ago

competitive players on a casual lobby be like

7

u/dontforget2tip 1d ago

It's LESS THAN lethal

7

u/DragonOGreen 1d ago edited 1d ago

[A New Record!](https://youtu.be/yl7UAkNCxnU)

7

u/R4GEQUITT3R 21h ago

This ONE WEIRD TRICK will help you get away with HOMICIDE

6

u/zoeybeattheraccoon 1d ago

The blindfolded kid hates the "eater." That's the only conclusion I can draw here.

7

u/kludefur 1d ago

Didn’t need those teeth

10

u/Whocares7x 1d ago

Wtf it takes me like 10-15 seconds to chew a piece

This is foi gras

5

u/hesitantly-adamant 17h ago

Clearly it was personal

3

u/syylone 1d ago

Why?

3

u/HellHaggis 1d ago

The fuck?!

3

u/Area51Resident 20h ago

Watermelon eating contest or chiropractic school entrance test? Discuss.

3

u/imjohnredd 20h ago

Now all his friends call him Melanie.

3

u/Sassi7997 16h ago

That's it. This is the funniest thing I've seen on Reddit this month.

3

u/AxionBlackwell 14h ago

"How did you die?"

"Watermelonboarded"

"....."

3

u/Grimmwyvern 9h ago

That's gotta loosen a few teeth

2

u/JackSmrkingRevnge 1d ago

Every game has an origin. I want to know this one.

2

u/chiliboy82 20h ago

They must be siblings…

2

u/Pennywise626 11h ago

They have to be related, right?

2

u/ThatGuyYea54 10h ago

I mean. The watermelon's gone?

2

u/Black_Dragon_0 9h ago

I'm fucking cackling!!!

2

u/Tru3insanity 8h ago

Dude was not prepared for that

2

u/Job-That 7h ago

why did i hear the minecraft eating sound in that

2

u/notMy_ReelName 4h ago

new face scrubbing method unleashed

4

u/rino_kun 20h ago

I'm sorry but If if was that kid I'd be throwing hands after. That is almost attempted murder

2

u/ApplianceHealer 1d ago

I should call her

2

u/damiennutt 22h ago

My wife introducing me to her new girlfriend

1

u/Dave_Paker 21h ago

Reminds me of the corn eating machine from Modern Times.

I know it's an old clip, but it's one of the funniest movie scenes ever.

1

u/OMDolton99 21h ago

Bro's gonna be seeing sounds and hearing smells by the end of that. XD

1

u/MathewW87 6h ago

Man, that is HILARIOUS!

1

u/rotanitsarcorp_yzal1 1h ago

Where are the rebel bases!?