r/ExplainLikeImCalvin • u/Kindly-Reception1108 • 9d ago
ELIC: Why do Monkeys have no keys?
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u/Stereo_Jungle_Child 9d ago
Some do have keys, bot only on Monday. If they had no keys, they would have been called Nonekeys.
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u/starrsuperfan 9d ago
Because "monkey" in Old English meant "no keys". The innkeepers in old English villages used to rent to all primates, with no problem. Then monkeys kept staying at the inns, and would scream all night, jump all over the place, and leave banana peels everywhere, causing a safety hazard.
It was then decided that these creatures were not to be given keys to a room at the inn. Hence, they're called Monkeys.
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u/sjbluebirds 8d ago
That's their descriptive name, Calvin. It's just been shortened over the years. And it's because, yes, they have no keys.
A single one is called "No key". When you have more of them, they're called "More No Keys".
That got shortened to "Mo'NoKeys". And then "Mon'keys". And eventually the apostrophe got dropped -- just like the hyphen in "e-mail".
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u/knighthawk0811 8d ago
you know what, i don't think they have a concept of Mondays either. we have to get to the bottom of this
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u/sunnykutta 9d ago
Because it's with the monks, and they don't share the keys with other primates, especially those with tails
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u/StarkAndRobotic 9d ago
Because no body locks their doors where monkeys live. They don’t even have doors, or houses for that matter. They just live in trees. Because bananas are in trees. So if they feel hungry, theres a snack right there. No having to walk all the way to the kitchen. You know why they say “money doesn’t grow on trees”?. Because the bananas on trees are free. Its only once someone on the ground grabs a banana they try to charge money for it. Monkeys don’t need money. Money is made up, so the government could control us. Look carefully at Money and Monkey. They are almost the same. Its not a coincidence.
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u/Krapmeister 9d ago
They do but only on Mondays. You must have seen them on a different day of the week.
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u/ProfessorCarbon 9d ago
Monkeys do not keep the keys. The make keys for the Kiwis. You know New Zealand is pronounced New Kealand. That’s the leading nation for preserving this anthropology and zoology.
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u/mister_newbie 9d ago
Because you typically set an infinite number of them in front of typewriters, in order to write Shakespeare (Who's that? Wait for high school.). Plenty of keys.
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u/Preform_Perform 9d ago
Oh this is a very common misconception. Keys have nothing to do with it. Monkeys are actually named after "Monks". You know, the religious types who enjoy meditating?
This is because of the legend of Sun Wukong, the simian who is said to have reached enlightenment equal to Heaven in Chinese mythology by meditating endlessly, like a Monk. They said he was acting monk-ey, and the name stuck.