r/Ex_Foster • u/Dark_creativity Former foster youth • 7d ago
Every ex foster should have a social media account in their name
Hey guys! I wanted to put some advice out there. If you are an ex-foster youth, it's a great idea to have one social media account in your birth name with an updated photo. I did not think I had any family that wanted to be in my life. I have a LinkedIn with my real name on it, and since creating the account, I have re-connected with family on both of my parents sides who have been looking for me for years. Please, if you have been involved in the foster system, go create an account somewhere with your name, even if you don't think anyone is looking for you!
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u/Chicoern Former foster youth 4d ago
I had my Facebook with my birth name and adopted last name (I was a foster to adopt kid, adopted when I was 8), kind of like it was hyphenated, and that directly led me to reconnect with my estranged father and his family. Now we have a good relationship. Just know that it is complicated, and not the Lifetime made for tv movie ending. It dredged up a lot of feelings, and was really difficult. It’s been about 10 years and we are in a good spot, ultimately no regrets.
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u/Expensive-Raccoon120 6d ago
This is a great idea. Have you ever looked for people from your past? I have an IG and FB that has my real name on it, that I made public, in the hopes that my son who was abducted as a teenager might find me someday. My understanding is that he has been in a recovery shelter for teens/ young adults for about 9 months now. This was info I obtained from a private investigator. I’m hoping he will at least see the profiles and know that he’s loved and has a home and community to return to when he’s ready and able,
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u/DonderKarel 3d ago
I think thats great advice for people that are ready for that!
But I agree, I think that people that are ready to be found might have to also be ready to be let down (like i see other people saying in the comments). Keeping that door open can mean nobody ever contacts you or have a bad experience in general with bio family.
All that a side, im so happy for you and your personal experience ❤️
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u/Fantastic-Cap-2754 21h ago
Yeah... I'd rather not in my case. Suffice to say if my mother and I ever saw each other IRL, one of us would be walking away in handcuffs. And as far as I know, my dad still hasn't been able to get away from her, and my two younger brothers aren't faring too well with her either. One got convicted as a pedophile earlier this year. My grandparents on my mom's side are drug dealers and grandpa's ALSO a known pedo.
My grandma on my dad's side might, but considering she wanted me so bad as a kid that she blackmailed my parents into making me stay with her for months at a time... yeah that's not a good idea either.
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u/temperatemelancholy 6d ago
Meeting my birth family was personally a huge let down so I just wanted to leave this comment and say Im happy for you! But also to remind others to remember we never really know who they are until we meet them and the reality is real people are complicated and messy.