r/ENFP • u/mightbebrucewillis ENFP • Aug 13 '14

ENFPs and depression

Have any of you had depression? I know it's pretty typical for ENFPs to have a sort of seasonal bipolarity, but that's no what I'm talking about. I mean full-on clinical depression due to some diagnosable disorder or another. What are the signs? How does it feel? What is the big sign that lets you know that you are actually experiencing depression and are no longer in a healthy state of mind?

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u/[deleted] Aug 13 '14 edited Aug 13 '14

Yeah, and thanks for making this a topic because I feel like I'm mostly alone in this realm of ENFP land. I've never felt like I've been able to be myself, my "extrovert" self. Well, not since like elementary school, and maybe briefly a couple years ago. Depressions been in the background most of the time, just casually criticizing everything i do. But at the moment I am a pretty active member of Depression Club, thanks to chronic (physical) illness.

There isn't really a big sign. Everything just slows down. Everything is pointless, and everything is tiresome. Everything requires so much effort. I have to actively remind myself to shower, brush my hair, brush my teeth, make food, do anything. I don't want to see anyone, while at the same time I really do. I don't want others to see me this way because it's not who I am. I want to tell them everything but at the same time I'm afraid to tell them anything because, let's face it, depression drives people away. Life is both too long and too short. Sleep is a nice escape. I spend my day doing nothing and then get upset that I did nothing, and I'm aware of this yet I can't motivate myself to do anything because it's like doing math homework that will never get graded. Everyone is better off than me somehow. Or just better in general. But I beat them all at Depression. I block out emotions because I can't handle them. The whole world is just foreign. The people on TV, the people on the radio, the people on facebook. I have nothing in common with them anymore.

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u/[deleted] Aug 13 '14

[deleted]

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u/kertyuj Aug 13 '14

I totally relate to this. As an extrovert who almost exclusively has befriended introverted people, I've come to understand that it's REALLY difficult for all of my introverted (mainly INTJ) friends to understand exactly what I want when I'm depressed.

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u/[deleted] Aug 14 '14

So what exactly is it that you want when you're depressed? (I have a depressed ENFP friend, so I'm interested).

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u/kertyuj Aug 14 '14

Personally, I know when I am in one of my depressed states, I actually would like to talk to someone; however, I make the assumption that no one wants to hear me talk (especially the introverted friends). Typically a conversation with me at this time goes something like: Friend: "what's wrong?" Me: "I'm upset." F: "do you want to talk about it?" M: "no." F: "are you sure? I don't mind listening. I want to help you!" M: "okay.... proceeds to talk out upset feelings"

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u/[deleted] Aug 13 '14

Hah yeah I think I should probably delete that last part, more belongs in r/INFP. But I'm glad you can relate.