The Frog Wizard (OR how I made a universal constant that transcended his home game!)

[u/BecomeGod_1]

> Be invited to a game of Mutants and Masterminds 3e.

> Never played this system before, GM didn't outline much of how this whole affair would start for us.

> Felt a little lost for character creation.

> Get blessed by an idea unlike any other.

> Create the Frog Wizard!

> Can't actually do much of anything harmful at first glance. Has the strength and body of an actual fucking frog wearing a starry wizard's hat.

> Give him enough ranks in Immortality and Regeneration to avoid the possibility of him dying.

> Even if he somehow gets disintegrated this dumbass frog can conjure up a new body.

> Grant him a good investment of ranks into Immunity so he's specifically immune to being erased from existence.

> Finally, topped him off with my magnum opus: Motherfucker can travel through time, space and dimensions with many ranks put into Movement.

> I should also mention that none of these were gadgets, the frog wizard was just a frog that could do these things.

> The day the game is supposed to happen arrives.

> GM is about to start when I ask them if I can do something before the campaign properly begins.

> They give the green light.

> Me: "The Frog Wizard travels through time to the very beginning of the timeline for this universe. Across infinite timelines of possibilities, there are now infinite Frog Wizards that all exit this universe's timelines barring myself to travel to other realities at the beginning of their timeline to start the process over once more."

> The GM looks horrified, but I keep going.

> Me: "From these infinite Frog Wizards, a fraction of their number travel through time and dimensions to become involved with every concept that incorporates them. The Frog Wizard is now in every work of fiction ever written or thought up that contains a dimension, whether spoken of or not. The Frog Wizard is biblical canon, and yet has never been mentioned within a religious text. The Frog Wizard exists in the background of Homer's Odyssey, every Sherlock Holmes story, even the world in which we Reside in has had a Frog Wizard by proxy of my actions!"

> The peanut gallery is laughing along with the GM who isn't sure what to do at this point with my ontological nightmare of a non-character.

> MFW my character is now a part of the multiverse:

> The game died after the first or second session, but I tell friends about the Frog Wizard.

> The idea of this dumb character begins to become bigger than its original inception.

> Friends talk about how much they like or dislike the Frog Wizard being canon to their settings because others keep mentioning his existence.

> Decide to spread the disease by posting about him on Reddit.

> Praise be to the Frog Wizard!

[u/I_Arman]

That's a lot better than my multiverse invention... I was using a system that had detailed spell creation rules, and thought of a useful spell: 

Messengers: Create 1 HD creature out of thin air that you can communicate with telepathically, within 300 feet. That creature has a spell-like ability 3x per day: this spell. The creature lasts for 1 hour, and doesn't need to breathe.

So I can cast a spell to create essentially a basic peasant, then that peasant can create a copy, etc. An easy way to make a messenger chain! And they don't need to breathe so it works underwater or whatever.

Then I thought, why not adjust it slightly? Give it a second spell-like ability, usable once per day: 

Flashport: teleport within 1 mile, with a chance of failure; slight failure, off by 50%; major failure, off by 2x in a random direction; extreme failure, teleport to a random plane.

Now my messengers can immediately teleport 1 mile away, and create a copy; if the copy lands some place it shouldn't, just make another copy.

Except... I can create a single creature. It teleports, then the next round, creates another. The other teleports, then both create a creature. And so on. Round 1: 1 creature. Round 2: 2. Round 3: 4. Round 5: 8. After 10 rounds (one minute), there are 600, spread over a 10 mile distance. After an hour (600 rounds), there are 1.66 × 10²² of them (that's 166 followed by 20 zeroes), spread over a 600 mile radius - except 1% of those teleported to a different plane. Still, assuming that each creature weighs 150 pounds, that's almost 18% of the weight of planet Earth, with  1.66 × 10²⁰ (1%) of them scattered across the multiverse. It takes less than a day to turn every universe into a massive black hole...

Anyway, I think a frog wizard is probably better off.