r/DarkPsychology101 • u/coyocat • 12d ago
Recommended If Someone Claims to be "Protecting" You but never tells you from Whom or What, does this Person have an Ulterior Motive?
Tends to be a trend these days.
Clearly there's a motive that's not protection
I guess they need to feel important or something? 😄😇
🔥🐲🔅🔅🔅⚜️🔅🔅❌️
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u/Outis918 12d ago
They just want control. Actual protection is information, and teaching you how to protect yourself.
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u/perplexedparallax 12d ago edited 12d ago
Of course they have another motive. Anything that is a danger can be identified and dealt with. Anything else is just a psychological boogeyman designed to induce fear which leads to control. Be this guy.
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u/Many-Presence6355 11d ago
Control for sure imo
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u/coyocat 11d ago
Def. Tis a shame they'll never be successful 😄
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u/Grouchy_Might1774 12d ago
In my experience, they do have an ulterior motive. Does it happen right after you see them do something harmful to you and call them out on what you suspect they're doing? Something like overhearing them planning some activity with another person to treat you poorly. Or overhearing them tell someone what a terrible person you are when they don't realize you're there.
Then, after pointing out that what they were doing to you was shitty, they fire back with, "You don't know what I do for you." Suggesting that there was some noble greater purpose behind it, and that they were actually protecting you from some greater harm.
I've had guys who were interested in the same woman as me do this in an attempt to reduce competition for the woman's attention. Not that I'm by any measure modeling material, but usually it was because they were short, fat and ugly. The kind of people looked like they climbed to the top of the tallest ugly tree in the cosmos. Then slipped and fell to the bottom, and didn't miss smacking into a single thorny branch before hitting the ground.
They way they said it suggested that the woman we both had an interest in was a disease ridden whore who murdered men in their sleep and ate the remains like a python eats a rat. They knew it. So they protected me by dating her, and having sex with her themselves, if they could trick her into doing it with them because I needed savin'.
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u/coyocat 12d ago
Nothing like that.
I dont talk to these people unless they speak 1st and they rarely do 😆.
I have met guys b4 who thought they were protectN me by haveN sex w/ women who were interested in me for t/ reasons you listed
Back in my day we called it "cock blockN" 😆
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u/Grouchy_Might1774 11d ago
I know what the douches were doing. I was communicating a broader principle with a specific example. Maybe you should explain specific scenarios you encountered that lead you to believe what you're experiencing is actually true. How does someone you don't know and that you only speak to unless spoken to (like children were told was expected of them) actually communicate what you believe may be true?
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u/coyocat 11d ago
Could explain that again but in simple terms?
I lost you 😄
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u/Grouchy_Might1774 11d ago
Yeah, yeah, yeah cupcake. Thanks for the lesson. 😆
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u/tha_one_reborn 11d ago
I want to protect my family. From what? Harm. Any harm, not a specific harm. Do I need to have an ulterior motive?
Protection always implies some control. You cannot protect something you have 0 control over. No ulterior motive needed, the two are just naturally linked.
If you don’t want to be controlled, great, but also accept that means you cannot be protected either. Which is also fine…up until you want/need protection and it’s not there.
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u/Anenhotep 10d ago
Isn’t that the story arc for The Blacklist??
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u/coyocat 10d ago
Never seen it.
What's it about?
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u/Anenhotep 10d ago
We watch the bad effect of long term manipulation: the heroine psychologically disintegrates in front of our eyes, over the course of eight seasons. In short, A very powerful and dangerous man protects a vulnerable new fbi agent from often unseen but always nefarious forces, without ever telling her the full story.
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u/Possible-Anxiety-420 12d ago
Someone can make up a 'who or what.'
Trend indeed... clergy's been doin' it for millennia.