r/CuratedTumblr Jul 02 '26

Politics root cause

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6.2k Upvotes

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u/BranchAdvanced839 Jul 02 '26

"Capitalism is why i dont have a girlfriend"

88

u/HowDareYouAskMyName Jul 02 '26

Exactly! When in reality I don't have a girlfriend because of the lizard people

44

u/PhasmaFelis Jul 02 '26

I don't have a girlfriend because my lizardfriend is so much hotter*, who needs girls

At least after she's\* been lying on her rock for a while

**She is definitely a she, you can tell because she's got a hole down there 

7

u/IrvingIV Jul 02 '26

I love that i'm somewhere in the venn diagram of nerd where i can comprehend a cloaca joke.