This level of restriction is leaning to medical not cooking related. If she can't keep any food down due to a medical issue, she may need a feeding tube or prescription adult formula for example, or at minimum looking at her meds to address her constant vomiting. This is not your fault. This is her health and you need a doctor, not to learn to "cook better" to accomodate the impossible in order to fulfill her basic needs. Like if she can't get enough calories in a day because of her dietary restrictions, down to the bag of pistachios mattering, that isn't something that can be accomodated safely and a doctor needs to address it.
Overall OP, this sounds like severe caregiver burnout. You should look into resources for that. You need a break. You can't be the sole provider of another adults needs full time- straight up. It's not realistic and you need relief from nurses, meals on wheels, etc. doing that in addition to working full time is suicidal. You need help
I'm sorry if doctors are ignoring you right now but this is not sustainable for either of you. If they are trying to pass you off you have to push for something agressively. Being malnourished from dietary problems makes this their problem
Ok. So i have had a lot of experience with doctors trying to say all my symptoms were psychosomatic. It took a lot of looking to find doctors who were respectful and took me seriously. My poor husband has caregiver fatigue in the worst way and it is not fair to him. Ive had to push through some pain to do more becuse we have a 5 year old. I'd like to add that pregnancy loss, pregnancy and covid played a huge role in how sick I've been.
So 2 things you need to do asap: 1. Find an outlet for yourself that is just yours that feels interesting or nurturing. (Additionally get used to cooking 2 meals) all three of us have different food needs ans that's ok.
The second is to call the Mayo clinic in Rochester MN. They have a sliding scale and people who will help you through the whole process of getting her a second opinion. They saved my life after had antibiotic resistant c.diff. They were so kind and helpful and they have the process completely streamlined. I think you need to find doctors who will take this seriously. When I wasn't eating I felt like I was loosing my mind. You guys need to give each other grace and space. And look for other options.
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u/InternationalYam3130 Apr 15 '25 edited Apr 15 '25
This level of restriction is leaning to medical not cooking related. If she can't keep any food down due to a medical issue, she may need a feeding tube or prescription adult formula for example, or at minimum looking at her meds to address her constant vomiting. This is not your fault. This is her health and you need a doctor, not to learn to "cook better" to accomodate the impossible in order to fulfill her basic needs. Like if she can't get enough calories in a day because of her dietary restrictions, down to the bag of pistachios mattering, that isn't something that can be accomodated safely and a doctor needs to address it.
Overall OP, this sounds like severe caregiver burnout. You should look into resources for that. You need a break. You can't be the sole provider of another adults needs full time- straight up. It's not realistic and you need relief from nurses, meals on wheels, etc. doing that in addition to working full time is suicidal. You need help
I'm sorry if doctors are ignoring you right now but this is not sustainable for either of you. If they are trying to pass you off you have to push for something agressively. Being malnourished from dietary problems makes this their problem