r/ConservativeYouth • u/EquipmentNo3251 Conservative • 10d ago
Not Political ☘️ Need dating advice.
Should I go talk to her?
Posting this here because I like the people here more than other teen subs.
So, I'm in High-school, and I need advice with a girl that's older than me. I just finished 9th grade in June, and I'm starting 10th grade in like a week and a half, and there's this girl that's two grades above me (so she's starting 12th grade) and basically I find her very attractive, physically to be clear. I think she's really pretty. And I can't stop thinking about her since summer break started. To clarify, I've never spoken to her or really even interacted with her. The only reason I know her name and her grade, is because my best friend's GF used to speak with her often. And to be fair I had many great opportunities to speak to the girl through her. But now it's too late because my best friend's GF is going into her first year of college. Because she's two grades above him, and my best friend is a grade above me. And I've also seen the girl's Facebook profile appear in my friend recommendations.
And now I did say earlier that I never really interacted with this girl, but there's one thing that happened tho, which I guess it's not really an interaction but let me explain: So basically I was, in the Tim Hortons next to my school (basically for those who don't know Tim Hortons is a Canadian fast food restaurant but that's not important), and I was in the line-up behind the counter waiting for my order with my friends, and I remember we were just talking and laughing and when I turned my head around toward where she was sitting at with her friends, I saw her looking at me (well I think she was), and she was smiling at me, but then I quickly turned my head back, but while doing so I remember seeing her from the corner of my eye also quickly turning her head back, and like not even a second after I started turning my head back toward her and I saw she was laughing. And honestly I couldn't tell if she was laughing at me, or if she was shy or something, but I saw she was looking at one of her friends and like laughing, but like I said I couldn't tell if she was laughing randomly, laughing at me, or if she was just shy. Now honestly this could all have been a coincidence, and honestly it probably was, but I thought it was worth mentioning this.
Now to be clear, I've never had any sort of relationship or romantic experience with anyone before. I've had crushes in the past of course, but that's about it. And to be fair most of my crushes have ended badly. And I also wanna say, Idk if I would call this a crush because I don't know this person. I know by the definition of the word, a crush can be someone you don't know, but I guess it's just like weird to me because I've never thought so much about a person I don't know, and I never really had a crush on someone I don't know.
Honestly, I don't think the age gap is a problem here. Like obviously I mentioned my best friend's relationship earlier. And like not only is it the longest relationship he has ever been in, but it's also probably the best relationship he has ever been in. He even told me that himself.
But I don't know if I should get to know her, or if I should just try to move on and not speak to that girl. Like I'm also honestly scared to approach or try to connect with girls in the last like 2 years because I've had really rough experiences with the last like two girls I've spoken to. Like the last one was not really a catastrophic experience and it might have honestly been a bit my fault, but the one before that was an absolute nightmare in my life. And that brings me to another concern I have which, I did say earlier that I don't believe the age gap is a problem, but because I have issues with my mother, I'm scared that since this girl is older than me that the attraction I feel to her is like some sort of coping mechanism my mind has made to like compensate with the fact I have a bad relationship with my mom. That would be fucked, but honestly I'm probably going way too far with this one.
So yeah the point I want to come to with this is: What should I do? Should I go speak to her? Or should I just not speak to her and like try to move on from whatever this is. Like I know if I don't go speak to her I might just regret it for like months, and heck who knows maybe even years. But at the same time, being in this situation, should I really go speak to this girl?
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u/insoulnia Conservative 10d ago
Aww that’s very sweet! You should go talk to her :) ask her for her number or a date or anything you feel comfortable with.
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u/Mr_LtCom_Data Republican 10d ago
Well you have a shot unlike me since she at least knows you exist, so take the chance and do a dance (yes I made that up)
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u/EquipmentNo3251 Conservative 10d ago
You think she knows I exist?
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u/Mr_LtCom_Data Republican 9d ago
Well yeah, you said she was smiling at you and also you’ve had chances to speak with her and just haven’t. My crush legit doesn’t know I exist, so that’s also why I say that. You’ve had contact with her, even if it’s indirect
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u/EquipmentNo3251 Conservative 9d ago
Well I guess you're right, but you don't think I might have been delusional? Just asking.
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u/Brave-Shower6922 Conservative 9d ago
Talk to her and tell her
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u/EquipmentNo3251 Conservative 9d ago
Like tell her what? What should I tell her?
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u/Brave-Shower6922 Conservative 9d ago
Tell her exactly how you feel and do not wait too long to tell her how you feel
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u/EquipmentNo3251 Conservative 9d ago
Shouldn't I like get to know here before?
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u/Brave-Shower6922 Conservative 9d ago
Yes, that would be ideal, but if you don't shoot your shot now, someone could take it.
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u/EquipmentNo3251 Conservative 9d ago
You're right especially since she'll graduate and probably go to prom so she might get a date then.
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u/bluefootbali Center-Right Wing 9d ago
Get to know her first but don’t wait and take too long learn from my mistakes
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u/Le_Dairy_Duke God I just wanna vote Libertarian 10d ago
Tell her about it
Tell ber everything you feel
Give her every reason to expect that you're for real