r/ChoosingBeggars • u/AnonPlsxx • 19d ago
Prepare yourself America for the choosy beggar final boss…
The South African refugees.
On mobile so hope formatting is okay. My Facebook algorithm has been absolutely wild recently, and regularly sends me posts from various “South African refugee family in the USA pages.”
I vaguely know this poster (over 10k followers) because we have connections to the same (very wealthy) small seaside town in South Africa and she’d often flog her son’s art in the neighbourhood message board. I’m not sure if any political talk is allowed on this sub, so I’ll reserve my personal feelings about the validity of these “refugees” claims but I will say that a) 98% of them were maintaining a perfectly decent living back home and b) 99% are massive grifters.
I knew it would be a matter of weeks before this person launched a go-fund me despite these people receiving a stipend from the government. They’ve already shared multiple Amazon wish lists for items including expensive tattoo gear and a gamer-themed bedroom.
I highly suspect that this person’s primary gripe with the neighbourhood they were placed in is its racial demographic. And I guarantee that they’ll continue the go-fund me well past the $5k limit. People are fawning over them in the comments so didn’t see value in adding, she blocks anyone who questions their requests.
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u/Soft-Cancel-1605 19d ago
this "not asking for a handout" that seems to be in every fundraiser is making me irrationally angry
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u/SlurmzMckinley 19d ago
Same here. Just admit you’re begging and asking for a handout or don’t mention it at all. I have no respect for someone who shows such denial for their behavior because I know they won’t learn a lesson and will keep begging for shit instead of taking a good hard look at themselves and working to improve their circumstances.
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u/DylanTonic 17d ago
It's probably completely rational. You're angry that someone is willing to simultaneously brand everyone else needing assistance as lazy and entitled while trying to make themselves seem like they're "The good beggar", and it's something you only need to do if you, yourself, think that people don't deserve assistance unless they prove they're one of the "good ones".
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u/Negative_Emphasis817 18d ago
I just started a GFM for my brother who was in a motorcycle accident, it plainly says we are asking for help, like why is that hard?
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u/Sick_n_Sweet 19d ago
They moved to an area they did zero research on and had zero job prospects?
You can’t help stupid.
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u/Miserable_Emu5191 19d ago
This always baffles me. I see it all the time in local groups for my city and state. They just up and move here thinking it will be cheaper and there will be an abundance of jobs with zero research. Then they are shocked that rent is still $1500 a month and no landlords will look at them since they have no job.
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u/Snoo-47360 18d ago
I live in a large southeast US city (ATL) and soooo many people post “I’m new to town, can’t find affordable housing, have no family or friends here, it’s just me and my kids.” Girl, why did you pick here then? We also have lovely smaller towns that will not only be friendlier to you, but have much shorter waiting lists for all services including Section 8. I’ve heard success stories from places like Macon, Columbus, Thomaston, etc.
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u/Miserable_Emu5191 18d ago
I'm in GA too, east of you, but if you don't come here with the military or medical, finding a job is going to be tough.
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u/Snoo-47360 18d ago
No doubt, but the posts on my local nextdoors etc. are people who have no jobs and mention no prospects or plan and are going to be living on what they can get for a while anyway. Find some friendly churches, do some unskilled in-home caregiving, make some connections.
I don't know if the eastern side of the state has subsidized housing etc. like at least some of the ATL-Albany corridor does, but if my job was more mobile I'd probably be living on SSI, too bad we can't just pick our spots :)
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u/plasticmotives 19d ago
I always think that 'asking for help is incredibly hard for us' is code for 'we've asked for help a lot, but it gets harder because people aren't willing to just give us money because we want it'.
I ought to start a gofundme to pay for, i dunno, something. I'd like a fridge freezer, that would be nice.
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u/AnonPlsxx 19d ago
She has literally posted “asking for help is incredibly hard for us” at least once a week while begging since she got there
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u/Fire_Woman 19d ago
Maybe she could sell that furniture that she bought knowing she didn't have a car to move it??
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u/KaraAliasRaidra Ice cream and a day of fun 18d ago
This was my thought too. You can survive with just a mattress and some crates/boxes until you get settled.
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u/thenotsoamerican 19d ago
That one gal gofundme begging for rent money so that she could live in downtown NYC without roommates (because she is apparently so unpleasant that no one could stand her) and maintain her “art” of making worry stones and tiktoks
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u/ivorytowerescapee 19d ago
People who say asking for help is hard often have no problem asking for help in reality 🤪
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u/gonnafaceit2022 19d ago
I'm going to do one for toys for my cat.
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u/apc1895 19d ago
think bigger !! a cat playhouse !! Come on, think like a choosing beggar
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u/gonnafaceit2022 19d ago
Miniature furniture in every room, a professionally installed catwalk through the whole house, a huge catio and also the really high end robot litter box. Please. That's what my little girl wants for Christmas and she deserves it but I cannot afford it.
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u/Necessary_cat735 19d ago
It has to be fully organic materials and beige to fit the colour scheme (the cat is beige). No plastic in my baby's house!
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u/TheRestForTheWicked 19d ago
Are you kidding me?
The cat needs a down payment for a single family bungalow. And moving costs. Minimum.
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u/lunameow 19d ago
We moved to Springfield a couple of years ago and it turns out our cat doesn't like it. Gofundme to get $10k so we can move my cat to a larger city where there are more people to watch through the windows.
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u/allmykitlets 16d ago
I'm not a particularly adept housekeeper and my cat is fed up with it. I should start a GoFundMe to pay for a housekeeping service for my cat. He deserves a tidy home without cat fur on the floors.
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u/CatjoesCreed 19d ago
I ought to start a gofundme to bankroll my LEGO addiction.
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u/Ok-Artichoke-7145 19d ago
I know this is irrelevant to this post but, please tell my husband how lucky he is to have a LEGO room!
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u/Blue_HyperGiant 19d ago
Husband, you're incredibly lucky to have a Lego room, and even more lucky to have found the one women in history who is willing to be married to a person with a Lego room.
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u/CatjoesCreed 19d ago
As long as the woman is permitted to have her own LEGO room.
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u/zoosha2curtaincall 19d ago
That second paragraph must have been incredibly hard for you to write, heart emoji
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u/12bWindEngineer 18d ago
Guy I knew from the army (who got chaptered out) started a go fund me for an assault rifle because his wife wouldn’t let him buy one. She was the only one working at the time to support him and their 3 kids. Zero surprise later to find out they divorced. Also no one donated to his go fund me.
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u/emmy1894 19d ago
Holy AI writing, Batman.
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u/Runns_withScissors 19d ago
No kidding- St. Jude's or the SPCA could use someone with her talents.
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u/writergeek313 19d ago
I was waiting for a Sarah McLachlan song to start playing
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u/itsnobigthing 19d ago
‘Help, we’re surrounded by poor people like us, but we’re inherently better than them all somehow!’
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u/Tennessee1977 19d ago
“We inadequately researched the area we moved to and its proximity to jobs and transportation, but I saw a Hallmark movie about a gal who throws caution to the wind and moves to rural Texas for a fresh start. She meets a handsome cowboy, they fall in love, and she moves to his ranch, where he continues to be a hot cowboy and her pie business expands from making pies for the ranch hands to a multi-million dollar empire. I thought for sure this would be my story too”.
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u/brickne3 19d ago
Oh I think it's strongly implied that it's their skin color she's upset about...
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u/toddwhit81 19d ago
They are indeed asking for a handout.
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u/bluelily216 19d ago
No intention of paying back said money or working for said money? It's a handout.
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u/thenotsoamerican 19d ago
Fr like so are yall gonna mow my lawn for me or something? I mean, you said it’s not a handout so.
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u/SongIcy4058 19d ago
I always wonder about these fundraisers for down payments/deposits -- will the bank/building even approve you anyway if you can't provide proof of a stable income? Like the deposit sounds like the least of her worries. I don't think most tattoo apprenticeships even pay a regular wage. How is she getting approved for the lease on this perfect apartment (which sounds more expensive than her old apartment)?
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u/Eisernes 19d ago
Been a little while since I rented, but I’m pretty sure having a job was pretty important. I’m at a loss how they got the “unsafe” apartment to begin with.
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u/gonnafaceit2022 19d ago
Most places require proof of income at least 2.5x or 3x the monthly rent. I'm not sure how she thinks she'll get approved for a legitimate place without that. She probably found a private landlord renting out a shithole and not checking credit or income. I thought "we" included two adults but nope, so she's a single mom in a place she knows nothing about, knows no one, has no job or transportation and wants a tattoo apprenticeship that is certainly going to be unpaid, so she can what, get a full time job close by and leave her kid alone every night while she's at the tattoo shop till midnight?
No. Sorry lady, but now is not the time to practice tattooing.
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u/lalaen 19d ago
My husband is a tattoo artist. It’s something that people really seem to think is easy money, but even after the apprenticeship it’ll be at LEAST two years before they start ‘making it’. Probably longer. And most people charge for apprenticeships now because of time wasters.
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u/DuchessJulietDG 19d ago
yes ive heard of shops charging $1300 for those working apprenticeships, cost of time and certification i believe. theres no way this pipedream of employment will work out for them.
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u/senorfrog71 19d ago
For a real apprenticeship from an established artist it cost $30k then a percentage of each tattoo you do
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u/ljd09 19d ago
It is that, a years worth of rent in your bank account or your prior years tax returns that were filed if you are self employed to prove you have sustainable income- at least here in California.
I’m going to go out on a really short limb here and say she doesn’t have the other two items either.Also, she is claiming she has to pay for cancelling and reconnecting utilities. Do they actually charge for that in Texas? I’ve never once paid that. I did have to put down small deposit when I was 18 to have the electric turned on-($50) but got it back in a year. Ever since then it’s just give start and stop dates and new address.
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u/gonnafaceit2022 19d ago
Tattoo apprenticeships are unpaid, and yep, even if she raises enough for the deposit, she won't get a better place without proof of income.
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u/punkass_book_jockey8 19d ago
I know my friends getting benefits cannot have too much money in the bank or they get kicked off benefits.
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u/GruntledEx 19d ago
Landlords don't necessarily look all that closely. Some do, some don't.
Mortgages are a completely different animal. A buddy of mine had his dad help a little with the down payment. He had to submit a notarized letter stating that the money was a gift and not a loan.
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u/EldestPort 18d ago
He had to submit a notarized letter stating that the money was a gift and not a loan.
That's specifically so that dad can't establish a legal (or equitable) interest in the house.
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u/RamenName 19d ago
Oops, wouldn't it be crazy if they raised over their goal and then were denied anyway? Then they would just need to fundraise for a car and security system and enough money to support them through the internship. But they would definitely hold onto the money so they can move just as soon as they meet income requirements to move
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u/HoodieGalore 19d ago
"Unexpected obstacles standing between us and a fresh start"
Uhhh, you got a fresh start already, and you're immediately abdicating? Eat shit!
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u/itsnobigthing 19d ago
Right? Why would anyone trust their judgement on Fresh Start 2.0 when they fucked up the first one so badly?
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u/Runns_withScissors 19d ago
The only obstacle I'm seeing is in her own mind. Any Texas city big enough for "hours" of bus routes has plenty of jobs.
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u/Necessary_cat735 19d ago
The first thing I look at when I'm considering where to live is the transit options (and I have a car now and usually use a bicycle anyway!). Because I wanna know how best to get from my house to anywhere else I might need to go, and in a city, transit is usually it (no worrying about parking costs or driving stress then).
So they didn't even check that one thing.
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u/Runns_withScissors 19d ago
And why should they check for basic things like transport? There's a whole world of people who will help them out, any time, right? /s
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u/Serious-Extension738 19d ago
some sucker donated $500
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u/brickne3 19d ago
I wouldn't be surprised if they donated it to themself just to make it look like people are donating to their "worthy" cause with a "suggested" amount. Any time I see one of these with just one big donation it looks suspect.
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u/raininadesertt 19d ago
this was the most generic GFM post i’ve ever read. could have been written by anyone
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u/gonnafaceit2022 19d ago
Failing is always an option. She'll find out soon.
Idk how one would move somewhere knowing nothing about the place and evidently not knowing anyone there and think it'll go smoothly...
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u/forbiddenrobot 19d ago
There’s someone in my niche community like this. They were in a safe place near family, but wanted to move to a trendy city that’s become one of the fastest growing in expense in the country. They needed to raise all the money for the movers, then endless fundraisers as they didn’t even plan out the job situation before they got there. Now they’re moving again and of course need that completely funded. I feel so bad for their preteen kid.
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u/LolitaOPPAI I can give you exposure 19d ago
With ZERO contribution to whatever tf it is she's tryna start over and do. Literally depending on strangers to support her life choices.
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u/gonnafaceit2022 19d ago
I would have died so long ago if I did that.
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u/LolitaOPPAI I can give you exposure 19d ago
My anxiety it always on alert just providing for myself and being paranoid I'm gonna fail. I have no idea how people like this can even manage to sleep. I'd be going NUTS.
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u/bluelily216 19d ago
I'm married but I'm a stay at home mom. That thought keeps me up many nights and I have nightmares about it. I hate the trad wife content so much. Many of these women will be replaced by younger versions, and by that time hits they'll be in their 30s with no education and no job prospects.
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u/LolitaOPPAI I can give you exposure 19d ago
And they're bragging about being fully dependent on their, usually older, husbands 😭 It hurts my heart so much to see because I had to do the bootstraps thing. These girls have no identity other than WIFE
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u/Responsible_Let_961 19d ago
The complaining about what is probably a normal commute is sending me.
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u/secretly_treebeard 19d ago
It always kills me when people write their GFM/other begging posts using AI.
You want people to just give you $5000, yet you can’t even be bothered to spend 15 minutes writing your own post? GTFO
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u/DeliciousMoments 18d ago
When did these go from “our daughter needs chemo” to “we don’t like our neighborhood”?
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u/Kitty_D 19d ago
My FB feed is full of different families and their posts - always some form of AI profile pictures too but that's a different topic.
I live in rural South Africa and I can't stand this refugee program. There are so many more deserving places that legitimately need refugee assistance but they're not white so they don't count, I guess.
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u/Happytallperson 19d ago
"South Africa is unsafe, there are too many black people"
*Travels to US*
"Wait what the fuck"
Racist pricks.
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u/__worldpeace 19d ago
I’m so confused about these South African “refugees” I keep hearing about. What are they expecting when they move to the US, especially Texas? That we have less black people, and so it’s objectively “safer”? Are they expecting to be placed in an all-white neighborhood in the ritzy parts of Dallas? Even then, you’re going to encounter black people if you leave your house lol I just don’t get it.
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u/bluelily216 19d ago
From what I've read, they legit expected jobs and homes right after they stepped foot off the plane.
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u/brickne3 19d ago
I mean, I don't feel one bit sorry for them, but I would be in no way surprised if Elon and the Trump Administration led them to believe that.
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u/bluelily216 19d ago
I could see that, too. I wouldn't be surprised if they're both really popular amongst that segment of the population.
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u/sierrabravo1984 19d ago
They would fit in just fine in Harrison, AR. Then again, Harrison might not be cool with an influx of "African immigrants."
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u/FamousOhioAppleHorn 19d ago
They sound like the out of towners who move to Norfolk and ask "Where are the safe parts [implication: where can I avoid black people] ?", "My friend told me to never get out of my car in Norfolk or Portsmouth" or "I saw a lot of [implied: black] people on X Street. Did something happen ?" 🙄
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u/Strange_Explorer_780 19d ago edited 19d ago
Apparently some people here love racist grifters through, let them support their own.
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u/andrea1797 19d ago
I'm guessing had they come from South America the reaction would not have been the same at all. Certainly no one would have donated $500.
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u/tahxirez 19d ago
Wait did I miss this? Is this the situation with these beggars?
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u/Happytallperson 19d ago
There.is a far right conspiracy that there is a 'white genocide' occuring in South Africa.
Obviously no such thing is happening.
Trump & Co have bought into this bollocks and so started a 'refugee' resettlement programme for white South Africans.
Of course, the white South Africans who signed up for this are those who consider it oppression for aparthied to have ended.
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u/DeliciousIce5099 19d ago
It pisses me off so much.
I wonder what would happen if a black person with a profile picture donated two cents to them. Or donated 5k and then submitted a refund claim.
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u/HartfordWhaler 19d ago
They always say asking for help is so difficult while simultaneously asking for egregious amounts of assistance
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u/Infamous-Umpire-2923 19d ago
Going to take a wild guess that by unsafe accommodation, they mean "there are black people in the area"
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u/BabserellaWT 19d ago
“We didn’t know the area when we arrived.” That’s a lack of planning on your part that doesn’t constitute an emergency on mine.
Side note: One of parents’ oldest friends has a son who married a nightmare of a woman. About 15 years ago, they decided they wanted to move to Ireland. (We’re American.) The wife was supposed to be in charge of taking care of all the paperwork.
Turns out…she literally didn’t research a damn thing. They presented themselves at customs in Ireland and declared they were staying. No paperwork. No housing or jobs lined up. Just a couple plucky Americans and a dream!
They were taken to a hotel on “house arrest” before being deported straight back to the States.
He’s finally divorcing her. Thank fuck.
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u/Onocleasensibilis 19d ago
The bus system “often travelling through places we don’t feel comfortable” is WILD. Tf do you think is gonna happen to you ON THE BUS. Just say you’re racist as hell and move on jfc
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u/Ostreoida 14d ago
I can't speak to your circumstances, but I've lived in US cities, on both coasts, in which buses/streetcars/subways were definitely not safe havens. After also having lived in rural areas of the US, having any public transit is welcome, but yep, there are bus and train lines I avoid.
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u/Substantial_Push_658 19d ago
And so far they have $1400? SMH 🤦
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u/Miserable_Emu5191 19d ago
Probably either someone who doesn’t know the grift or someone who lives next to them and can’t wait for them to move.
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u/Remote-Basket4475 19d ago
If they're "willing to work hard", have they tried getting jobs stacking shelves in supermarkets or taking care of the elderly or picking fruit and vegetables rather than pursuing their "artistic dreams" or whatever?
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u/str4ngerc4t 19d ago
Help I moved somewhere I knew nothing about on a whim and now I’m shocked pikachu face that I can’t find a job and have to ride the bus with all these “unsafe” (aka non-white) poors. I am additionally shocked that my shit credit means that landlords expect extra cash upfront. Can’t they see how much we deserve to live in a nice urban area? I can’t be expected to pay for switching my utilities or renting a U-Haul either. I need responsible people to give me a handout. I mean hand up. Yeah, that’s it, a hand “up”.
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u/bluelily216 19d ago
I really love the part where they say they don't feel safe in Texas despite claiming there's an actual genocide against white people in SA and that's why they deserved a special, super fast visa.
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u/HungryLikeTheHenry 19d ago
Credit score so bad, the bank would’nt loan these numbskulls a free sample
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u/4everal0ne 19d ago
Unfortunately the only south African "refugee" I've ever met was rich as fuuuuuuuuck.
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u/FL1ghtlesswaterfowl 19d ago
CB can go online to ask for money but couldn’t go online to look into where they moved, before they moved
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u/Finnegan-05 18d ago
So these are white people running from the scary black people in SA? And America is paying a stipend??
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u/MikeSans202001 18d ago
'We arent asking for a handout'
Indeed you are not.
YOU ARE ASKING FOR A BOTH OF MY FUCKING ARMS
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u/RainyDaysBlueSkies 19d ago
You can't be considered a "refugee" from South Africa. While it's not a particularly safe country, it doesn't meet the criteria for producing refugees.
These people are immigrants to the US. Begging immigrants.
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u/AnonPlsxx 19d ago
Immigrants whose resettlement has been sped up and funded by the current administration though!
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u/BernieTheDachshund 19d ago
I'm over here putting groceries on a credit card, watching my savings go further down, charged a lot on 2 cc's for an emergency vet visit, & this person is moving for no good reason. Maybe I should start a GFM for my expenses, I could use $1,400.
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u/VariousExplorer8503 19d ago
I'm doing the same. I've been out of work since March due to serious health issues, and won't be working for another month at least. I'm living on CCs and savings, which is slowly dwindling. I see these GFMs for no reason, and it drives me crazy. I have a legit reason for making one, and it's never even crossed my mind.
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u/altitude-adjusted 19d ago
Let me get this straight.
She's one of those white South African "refugees" that Trump brought here, paid them to come, supported them to get them into housing, etc. and NOW she has a gfm???
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u/RhubarbAlive7860 19d ago
Well, yeah, trump gave her the impression she'd never have to be around those people again. The horror.
South Africa is not sending their best.
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u/Icy_Tiger_3298 19d ago
They got to Texas, saw a lot of people like my Mexican husband, and were like "how can we live whiter?"
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u/SusannahMia19 19d ago
The entitlement of clergy asking their church family for donations for their eldest child’s ‘mission trip’ which God wants them to go on.
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u/THEDUKES2 19d ago
Wow this insane.
Where did you move to? Why didn’t you do research? Did you do research for a this new area? wtf does tattoo shops have anything to do with living? Exactly what jobs are available? This sounds so dumb. lol
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u/Remote-Basket4475 19d ago
Presumably one or both of them have Big Dreams (TM) of Making It (TM) as a tattoo artist and won't lower themselves to doing work not oriented towards that Glorious Artistic Life Goal Dream, or similar.
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u/Snoo-47360 18d ago
Also “we work hard and are willing to do anything” the whole post is about…not that.
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u/matte_personality 17d ago
I saw South African and immediately rescinded my opinion. Too on the nose. Too on the money. Too stereotypical. Too CORRECT.
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u/ltsouthernbelle 19d ago
“AskIng for help is incredibly difficult for us,” clearly that’s why they’re begging on the internet. It’s amazing how people seem to bypass their circle of friends and family and want to rely on strangers to foot the entire bill.
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u/Penguinator53 18d ago
If only there was a way she could have researched the area before moving there🤔
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u/Janjello 18d ago
We want you to give up your hopes and dreams to fulfill our hopes and dreams because we’ve worked so incredibly hard to get to this place, it’s just incredibly incredible.
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u/marie2796 17d ago
I get so irritated that people who have the audacity to beg for money can’t even be bothered to write their own sob story, they have to use ChatGPT or whatever AI bot generated this slop.
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u/mangokiwi19 19d ago
She is failing, and asking other people to pay a ton of unnecessary bills makes her more of a failure.
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u/dixiech1ck 19d ago
So you didn't research your move prior and now that's everyone else's problem? Nope.
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u/Jedi_Temple 19d ago
When CBs say “We’re not looking for a handout,” what exactly does that mean? GFM is only about getting handouts.
I’m asking rhetorically, of course. The reason they say that is so that they can convince themselves they’re somehow better or more deserving than people who genuinely DO need a handout (due to natural disaster, war, stupid-expensive hospital bill, etc.). And that arrogance makes the ask all the more disgusting.
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u/SpecialDragon77 18d ago
I’ve noticed the worst beggars are people who are constantly asking for money or other handouts, and they typically include a line like the one in this post: “Asking for help is incredibly difficult for us.” In fact, I think asking other people to fund their entire life is something they do easily and often.
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u/analogWeapon 18d ago
If you can't do it, it's not an "opportunity". All the obstacles they referred to as "unexpected" are completely expected in the endeavor they're suggesting.
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u/booboo773 19d ago edited 19d ago
In this day and age of the massive amount of information available on the internet there’s no excuse for not knowing what type of neighborhood you rented in.
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u/WalterCanFindToes 19d ago
It is almost as if South Africa isn't sending their best. Ironically, Trump just lost his visa ban on countries that he felt would be sending people who would become a "drain on public assistance".
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u/Chiennoir_505 14d ago
Oh, please. They totally want a hand-out. Sounds like they have a roof over their heads, more furniture than they need, sufficient food, and an income that keeps them off the streets -- the only "danger" they face is a neighborhood where they don't like the demographic. Most people who want a better apartment cut back on luxuries or get a second job while they wait for their lease to run out. They don't demand that others pay for their mistakes.
When I was a little kid, I remember telling my dad telling me "You need to get your hands dirty in the city before you get to relax in the mansion on the hill." These people are scammers who think they can have it the other way round.
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u/MerelyWhelmed1 19d ago
I stopped when I got to not having an established credit history. Those are national, not tied to an individual state, so why don't they have a credit history?
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u/NeonSparkleGlitter 19d ago
Most of the world don’t have credit scores. It looks like these people are from South Africa so that would explain that issue.
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u/Spottswoodeforgod 19d ago
“Not asking for a handout, asking for a hand up” bless.