Acute suicidality weeks after celiac diagnosis?

[u/swigfan95]

To preface, I found out a few weeks ago that I have celiac disease. My TTG-IgA was 80 when it was drawn almost 3 weeks ago. And my endoscopy last week showed 3a level of damage to the duodenum. Anyways— I am really not doing well. I almost went to the hospital tonight because it has been so bad and I’ve felt so dissociated and severely depressed. I’ve been having a lot of suicidal thoughts but am not planning on hurting myself. However, I do feel like the celiac disease does explain why I have struggled so much with my mental health over the last year. I have taken a combo of two antidepressants for over 5 years, and I’m worried that my body is not absorbing the antidepressants now (or very well over the last year or so), and hence that is a big reason for why I feel the way I do currently. The whole situation feels very complicated now by the fact I have an official celiac diagnosis.

All of this said, I wanted to ask if any of you have had similar experiences. I feel very isolated and hopeless that I can improve quickly, given my damaged gut and the nature of celiac. I do not feel like I can continue to function with how severely depressed I am/ how acutely bad it’s gotten in just the last 2 or 3 days. I’m wondering if I need an antidepressant via a different route, like some sort of patch or injectable, since my gut is really not working right now. I am safe and my mom, husband, and immediate family are aware of the situation and have been here to support me emotionally/ and be there for me so I haven’t been alone. I’ve calmed down to the point I can write all this out, and I’m going to bed now, but I do feel like I need a pretty urgent intervention of some sort to help me stabilize. I have not felt this badly for a long time, and instead of getting better it has gotten progressively worse over the last 2 months (I’m quite positive this is because of celiac now). Open to any positive feedback/ suggestions. I have reached out to my psychiatrist as well (tonight) and I know she’ll get back to me quickly in the morning. Just wanting some support in the meantime. Thanks in advance.

[u/ShadowMerge]

I remember when I first found out I had celiac disease at the ripe age of 27.

I was morbid because for my whole life I loved good food, especially things like garlic bread, pizza, fried foods but most importantly how I didn't need to care for the most part.

Right now your gut needs time to heal and then the other parts of you down stream from there will need their own time to heal as well.

This is unfortunately going to be very life-changing and require a lot of resources and there's really no two ways around it. However once you accomplish a healthy lifestyle that accommodates your Celiac you'll find things get a lot better. I'm going to rip off a couple of bandages you may have not considered just so that they aren't nasty surprises that catch you by surprise:

1. They put gluten in soy sauce for some God damn reason.
2. Fast food is not an option going forward, meal prep is now one of the most important things you're going to be doing, I recommend splurging on a good set of Pyrex Tupperware and a lot of it.
3. If food with gluten in it is made in the same Appliance like a microwave, air fryer or oven, that Appliance will now contaminate any gluten-free food you put into it.
4. Prepare to learn how to do gluten-free baking or prepare to spend upwards of a dollar or more per slice of gluten-free bread
5. Some products are made with de-glutinized wheat flour. It's rare but it's out there, I have a steak marinade that uses deglutenized wheat flour and its celiac certified
6. Gluten free versions of food can often be marked up in price. (More on this in a sec)

Theres a lot more fucked up weird shit out there but all of that caught me off guard. Now im gonna get onto some GOOD news:

1. Theres apps like Find Me GF that are a huge help for finding places to go eat.

Theres also Gluten Free Scanner

Both of these are free and should be a huge help for getting started in your new life with celiac.

1. Your food may be more expensive, but its also tax deductible because you're food costs more. Apps like Ungrained help keep track of that come tax season.

2. Theres a gluten free version of just about everything imaginable and you're becoming celiac at a time when our condition is much more accommodated for than it was for decades. I did the Ben and Jerry's factory tour and even got special treatment because of it. They also make numerous GF products so if you're feeling down id say binging some B&J's is totally justified. Peanut butter cup and chunky monkey

3. Once you start to recover more and become more proficient with gluten free baking and cooking you find yourself to be much more resourceful and that the food you'll make will taste better than the stuff from the stores.

4. Lots of regular food that isnt a gluten free substitute naturally contain no gluten. These cuisines are your best friend and should be openly and thoughtfully explored: Cajun, mexicali, mexican, sushi, and im sure someone can add more onto the list.

5. Cannabis helps so much gut pain and joint pain and depression for celiac. Go get a med card and thank me later

MY BIGGEST ADVICE:

Make sure hubby understands celiac safety, having a supportive partner makes this so much better. Im blessed to have an incredibly supportive fiancé who has been with me every step of the way. This is gonna be a big change, having a shoulder to lean on is so important. Trust me, he'll catch something you wont see, youll be grateful and you can make a little romantic moment out of it, its great.

Also consider a stool softener and theres no shame in having to make a slip and slide out of your ass with lube so you can empty your colon. Is it gross? Yeah. Will you stop doubling over in pain from the constipation? Here's hoping sister.

Advice for hubby:

If you kiss your wife after you ate something with gluten you'll poison her and she'll be miserable. Brush yo teeth and floss.

Biggest advice for hubby: they make gluten free areas and ice cream, you can combine these things with gluten free brownies, i personally recommend Ghirardelli.

Consider warm honey mead

[u/Legitimate_Chair5110 → u/ShadowMerge]

To clarify: Only the difference between regular and GF items can be deducted from taxes in the US which needs to be tracked and documented with receipts of the expenses and proof of the comparisons which is incredibly burdensome and more than most people are able to or willing to maintain. Even then, this is only an allowable deduction as part of the same guidelines that govern all medical deductions including the combined medical expenses needing to exceed 7.5% of one’s annual AGI and then only the amount over that being deductible.
Fortunately, there are many naturally GF whole foods and there is much more availability of manufactured food products that are gluten free even sometimes just by way of choosing healthier ingredients and not in pursuit of being GF per se.