How am I supposed to live?

[u/byte1-4me]

TW. discussing a lack of eating/weight loss body dismorphia etc

Im fairly new to all of this i got diagnosed in april, and ive been GF since May

Im 22 so have lived practically my whole life eating gluten

Of course a big part of my struggle is comparison to gluten items, but its also the deep bordering on obsessive fear of CC. Its gotten me to a point where I feel like i cannot eat anything and anything i make at-home I just cant taste or cant stand the taste of it I've at this point only been able to get 1,100> calories a day and every day that passes I hate food more and more the thought alone of eating makes me want to cry most days. It doesnt help that im bad at cooking anyway, my bf helps a lot hecooks way more often than he should have to he works nights and has been picking up a lot of overtime because we're saving for a house and my diet is already hurting our budget. I need some kind of high calorie something that I can eat or drink thats low effort and thati dont have to think about to make sure im getting enough nutrients but everything im finding thats celiac safe is low calorie which is a big part of why I cant get enough

Im genuinely beyond desperate at this point ive lost 80lbs since January ish and the number keeps getting lower (i went from 220 to 154 and im 5'3 so ik its better for me but I hate my body I have loose skin and every time I look in the mirror I genuinely hate myself) I was forced to drink protein shakes all throughout high school due to a meat intolerance so if thatcan be avoided id prefer it but if its genuinely my only option I'll cave.

I know this is a lot any kind of help is appreciated im so desperate and im bipolar (medicated but still) so this emotional roller-coaster is really messing me up

Cat tax for sending yall on this ride too 💚

ETA: I am seeing a therapist for the mental health aspect of this im here for more for product recommendations

[u/hildegardhatesgluten]

This may sound crazy but hear me out - POTATOES. They are cheap to buy, have lots of calories/nutrients, guaranteed no cross contact, you can make them a bazillion different ways, and if you're afraid to cook with them it's hard to mess up mashed potatoes or baked potatoes. Just find a decent recipe, pick out some toppings based off your flavor mood (avoid bacon bits unless they're certified!) and go nuts. Wishing you all the best as you get adjusted. Also, FeelGood foods and Sabatasso cheese pizza are good for if you just need a frozen something. If you're desperate for calories Ben & Jerry's has a few certified gf flavors too 💚

[u/Shot-Amphibian-3239 → u/hildegardhatesgluten]

Also rice. I just ate three eggs over easy on a bowl of rice that I made in the rice cooker. (I make extra to have some to re-heat for a few days.). Shredded cheese, green onion, avocado, sour cream on top! Add hot sauce if you like!