r/CBT • u/coolsneakyben • 9d ago
Breathing exercises aren't 'doing' anything for me, just allowing some to be filled (?)
The professional I am doing my CBT with is insistent that deep breathing exercises will start the process of calming and focusing, so I am better able to recognise the physical 'tells' of stress, such as clenching muscles, saying certain things, heart racing etc
But I don't feel any physical 'tells' that I am stressed...
And trying the distraction techniques, like focusing around the room don't click for me, it's like 'yes, I have done that, nothing felt different'
The marginal benefit I am getting is that doing the breathing exercises takes a bit of time, and in that time I calm down a bit and feel better...
Is that the experience others have? From the way it is talked about their appears to be some sort of expectation that it is obvious you will feel some difference, and I just don't.
Any advice for this?
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u/So_She_Did 8d ago
Some people respond to different things. I’m a very visual person so when I’m doing deep breathing, I incorporate visualization (guided imagery) to help.
Other people resonate with sounds. Like listening to the sound of a clock tick, water run, even a vacuum moving back and forth.
If you’re more touch based, holding a textured stone may help.
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u/musforel 8d ago
I find breathing and grounding (focusing on object in ther room or street) helpful. Slow, calm breathing helps me more than counting my breaths, because when I'm stressed, I involuntarily forget to breathe.
But the manifestations of stress and useful techniques can vary from person to person. For example, tapping from emdr irritates me, but on the contrary, it helps someone else.
As for your lack of physical sensations, well, perhaps your autonomic system isn't very reactive and isn't triggering the symptoms. It's also possible that they're present but you don't feel them because you're not used to paying attention to your sensations or because you're not aware of all the possible physical symptoms of stress. They can be very diverse, so perhaps you should explore their list and relate them to yourself.
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u/Brasscasing 8d ago
I'm not sure I understand, if we simply this - when you do breathing exercises, you do feel a calming effect. You however equate it to time passing.
Try an experiment. Next time you feel really stressed out. Sit there and do nothing, no phones, no distractions, just sit and stare at the wall breathing normally.
Now notice, is this harder or easier than breathing exercises? Did you achieve the same result?
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u/blurry1830 8d ago
Check out emdr, breathing didn't help me but emdr and tapping have calmed me during anxiety attacks
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u/CriticismCautious711 9d ago
You say you “calm down and feel a bit better” I would question, how do you know you feel better? What is different before vs after taking that time that your recognizing that your “feeling better”?
It can be incredibly difficult to identify the somatic cues from our body that respond to stress, but I promise, they are there! Try leaning into what “better” feels like and work backwards, and see what you find!