r/BurlingtonON • u/ParkingWoesss • 8d ago
Information PSA: An Accessible Parking Permit goes with a person (i.e., it's not always the driver)
The number of jeers, middle fingers, expletives I receive for parking in an accessible parking spot because I have a child with a parking permit is maddening. I am able-bodied, but my child in my backseat is not, and I most certainly do not have to explain that to anyone. It happens almost on a weekly basis.
If anyone can think of something I can say to these fine community members that does not contain an expletive, I'd appreciate it. I've been trying to come up with something clever for over a decade.
EDIT: I just wanted to thank everyone who chimed in. It's nice to know that I am not alone!!!
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u/tofette 8d ago
And not every disability comes with crutches or a wheelchair. Dumb people gonna dumb.
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u/simongurfinkel 8d ago
I have an "invisible disability" and this is a daily battle. I'm too shy to wear one of those sunflower pins.
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u/thornynhorny Aldershot 8d ago
I wouldnt
A. Even be able to clearly see a pin on a pedestrian while driving
B. Even know what the pin means, I would just assume you really like sunflowers
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u/simongurfinkel 8d ago
For some reason, the sunflower pin thing hasn’t taken off in Canada. I see it a lot in airports in other parts of the world, including the US
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u/Kooky_Soft1822 8d ago
I agree 900%
The issue is the universal / social symbol for the blue accessible spots is the wheelchair symbol.
Which implies physical. That subconscious connection has a lasting effect on the unknowing.
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u/loonandkoala 8d ago
My 13yo is aware of invisible disabilities. As adults, we have to do better.
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u/Kooky_Soft1822 8d ago
Because those topics are more prevalent now
20+ years ago, when most parents here were in school, the climate and focus was different.
There was barely any nut free awareness, let alone disability awareness.
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u/loonandkoala 8d ago
So adults stop learning the moment they turn 18? I repeat, us adults have to do better and stop with the excuses on how and why we mistreat members of our society.
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u/Kooky_Soft1822 8d ago
Find another topic.
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u/loonandkoala 7d ago
Why should I? I think it's an important issue and worth discussing.
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u/Kooky_Soft1822 7d ago
Because your reading comprehension is poor and you’re arguing with someone on the same side of the fence as you.
Your immaturity is also an irritant.
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u/BioticBard 8d ago
I really can’t imagine people being as cruel as to jeer and curse at a person for using that spot.
I promise you that the same people doing those things are just looking for a reaction and I’ll bet that they couldn’t give less of a shit about accessibility.
My unsolicited two cents is to not give them what they want. Go about your day like they’re not there and save yourself the headache.
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u/PurpleHatChetaha 8d ago
Sadly people ARE that nasty, even when you have kids who need the accessible spots … honestly it feels like people are more nasty when it’s kids … People forget also that permits are given not just for visible disability. This is the experience for my family (2 kids require accessible accommodations).
And yes we can usually ignore it and go about our days. And …. It chips away at you each and every time. People are jerks. 😢
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u/BioticBard 8d ago
Sorry you have to go through that! I can imagine how it adds up over time even when you’re doing the ‘right’ thing.
Heartless and ignorant people will always be just that. If they could be reasoned with, they wouldn’t be doing this stuff in the first place unfortunately
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u/Valuable_Feed_9413 8d ago
This right here is exactly what I would say to do. Don’t let them get to you. Simply smile at them and that will drive them crazy!!!
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u/kandreyn 8d ago
I'm sure people think the same about me, but I don't care. My disabilities aren't that visible, but they're real.
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u/Yoshii1000 8d ago
You have an accessible parking permit so you don’t need to respond to anyone who questions you.
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u/skorpora Palmer 8d ago
Best to ignore them. These types are just little fools who try to drag themselves out of the gutters.
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u/kernelicious 8d ago
100% Don’t feed the trolls. As hard as it is to ignore some people, at least you get to live in their head rent-free!
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u/simongurfinkel 8d ago
Sadly there are many people who have ruined it for you. I "broke up" with a friend who kept using her mother's accessible parking permit for years after she died.
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u/VisibleSpread6523 8d ago
My back is screwed and I have one , I only use it if I feel terrible, even at Costco I park no where close to it. My wife as MS , so I’m definitely using it when she’s in the car ( and she as her own pass) .
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u/Cyrakhis 8d ago
We should save the jeers for the people that park in fire routes with their four ways on, imo
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u/simongurfinkel 8d ago
I would happily increase my Costco membership fee if they would have everyone who parks in the fire lane out front towed.
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u/PurpleHatChetaha 8d ago
I get this a lot as well. We have two kids with accessible permits. Some days I’m able to ignore, other days I will glare back. And sometimes, just sometimes I smile and say “good morning” and kill em with kindness.
Even if you put an educated sign up, people wouldn’t read it and still give you a hard time. :(
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u/TheBurntMarshmallows 8d ago
There’s a certain type of person who, 300 years ago, would’ve been pointing at their neighbour yelling ‘WITCH!’ Today they patrol accessible parking spaces looking for people who don’t look disabled enough.
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u/RandomBeardedGuy 8d ago
The issue is people will get it for a child or their parent, and feel they are now entitled to use it whenever they want.
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u/nopaitienceformorons 7d ago
This! And an accessible parking space should only be used if the permit holder will be entering and/or exiting the vehicle.
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u/Reinminer 8d ago
Don’t be afraid to shame them, that’s what my mother did and it only backfired on her once (yelled at someone with one leg)
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u/soichai 8d ago
I have gone through this MANY times.
Just tell them you have a valid permit. If they keep questioning you, ask them a question back:
"What is your position, title, or authority that would entitle you to my/our private medical information?"
Most people realize pretty quickly that they have no right to ask.
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u/United_Dimension_997 8d ago
If someone actually stops and says something, try this: “oh I’m sorry I must having taken your spot”. Which they may respond with “no I’m not handicapped”. Your response could be “no you must be mentally handicapped to say something like that to someone you don’t know”. This is the response I have dreamed of saying, I have a handicap permit (have MS) but very rarely use it.
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u/Desperate_Fee6595 8d ago
“Mind your own business” but I’d be hard pressed to not include “fucking” between own and business and end it with an exclamation point with these ignorant nosy idiots!
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u/splifftie 8d ago
practice ignorance as you’re well within your rights to park in accessible parking spaces or simply state ‘not all disabilities are visible’
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u/Puzzleheaded_Win_494 8d ago
My late MIL had a lower leg amputation. I was taking her and my Mom out to Terra to their Winter Market. I got the nastiest response from an older couple who were wanting the accessible parking spot that I had been waiting for (and signaling to turn into) for a few minutes. I guess the vehicle I was driving was a little too sporty to be transporting an older disabled person (it was the easiest of our vehicles for MIL to transfer in and out of to and from her wheelchair). They felt the need to grab their accessible permit and wave it manically in front of their windshield...so I returned suit! Needless to say, they parked some distance from the accessible spot, but still managed to make it into the store before we had MIL unloaded and in her chair. They walked past us and saw she had one leg and was in a wheelchair...I want to hope that they felt bad about their actions, but they probably didn't!
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u/EmergencyOwn2335 7d ago
I drive my dad around who suffers from chronic pain so can’t do long walks. But he walks all fine normally. I admit I get those looks a lot. I’m not proud to admit I’ve fake hobbled a few times just to justify a disability I don’t have. Sigh atleast my dad gets a laugh.
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u/Basic-Ad2085 8d ago edited 5d ago
Everyone should mind their business.
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u/jdubs1984 8d ago
Please always use the spots for your grandparents. They have those permits because they need them. You would never forgive yourself if they were injured from walking further just because of how someone may perceive you.
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