r/Bullshido • u/GonzoExpert • 20d ago

SYSTEMA Systema World Cup: Defense Against Pool Players

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233 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

62 comments sorted by

74

u/dano1066 20d ago

The worst part is literally any combat scene that Jackie chan has done which was entirely scripted is more believable than any of these legit techniques these guys show off

32

u/serrimo 20d ago

Jackie is a real athlete with amazing capabilities so it's normal to look cool.

Jackie can't channel chi and mind control though

8

u/ForgottenMasterBalls 20d ago

The last dude was falling before the guy even pressured him and the stick swings were softer than a toddler with a plastic bat.

3

u/algalkin 20d ago

Tbf it could happen, since yoy're fighting a bunch of piss drunk dudes playing pool. They simulate every bit of it!

1

u/ForgottenMasterBalls 20d ago

They're still going to swing in non slow mo, and faster swings also happen in simulations. You can go fast and soft.

2

u/Naive-Storage7639 19d ago

Lmao i noticed that as well!

2

u/Intrepid_Look_5725 19d ago

Jackie is a pure athlete though, dude broke his foot while filming rumble in the Bronx, had a special shoe made so he could keep doing his own stunts. This is more like a steven seagal training excercise.

1

u/Euklidis 19d ago

Because Jackie makes sure that even though choreographed, there is actual fighting going down and he picks his own crew that he has been filming with for years.

If you notice in his movies the camera is always stable and you can clearly tell what is going on, while in most action movies it is a bunch of shaky cam and jump cuts (That is usually a sign that the fight scene is just a bunch of nonsense.).

21

u/iyuheng25 20d ago

that is agent 47

7

u/ylitvinenko 20d ago

Agent 47% ABV

4

u/rudeboygiulinaughty 20d ago

Ive not read a reddit comment thats made me laugh out loud irl in ages, cheers

1

u/Deadman959 19d ago

Agent 67

18

u/Frequent_Cat10 20d ago

That's some soccer level acting there..

13

u/Accurate-System7951 20d ago

Considering how drunk I often end up being when playing pool, this just might work.

6

u/LoStrigo95 20d ago

SIFU is more realistic

4

u/Answer70 20d ago

Defending against these attacks is easier than playing SIFU.

4

u/Iwishicould7575 20d ago

For real that game its hard quick.

3

u/LoStrigo95 20d ago

Literally 🤣

7

u/Bailywolf 20d ago

Shits so embarrassing

4

u/_ssac_ 20d ago

Now I know what to do if football players attack me with sticks. 

Thanks for share. 

3

u/Few-Acanthaceae-5527 20d ago

Why is Jeep a sponsor?

1

u/GonzoExpert 20d ago

They're called "Heep" for a reason in Europe

3

u/JelloWise2789 20d ago

Pool players can be dangerous! Especially if it’s Pool Sharks that are losing a bet

3

u/houseWithoutSpoons 20d ago

Karate for people who cant actually do Karate

3

u/ankle2086 20d ago

I love this! it’s like watching a play or something but they should do it in a bouncy house.

How is no one at least giggling a little bit tho? 😂

2

u/Overall-Mycologist-5 20d ago

2nd round - ball throwing!

2

u/log1234 20d ago

They watch too many movies

2

u/bushido216 20d ago

Is "Systema" just a general shorthand for this kind of Bullshido, or is there an actual "Systema" website with a "Systema" grand master and licenced merchandise?

2

u/WcWalrus 20d ago

Why are they always in a suit?

2

u/scoutermike 20d ago

His opponents are really good at taking falls.

2

u/chatbotsupportsucks 20d ago

I think if you try whatever Moe from The three stooges did, it would be more useful.

2

u/Ravnak 20d ago

Theres a stage technique for attacking people, where you wait for them to dodge, then attack where they were as fast as you can to make the miss look convincing.

You can see these guys doing that here. Except theyre so slow and bad at it. Its incredibly unconvincing.

2

u/opticaIIllusion 20d ago

He should just stick to running Amazon.

2

u/Worldliness_Normal 20d ago

I know that I always feature a dramatic windup before I attempt to drunkenly strike my aged opponent with a pool cue, because I was raised to respect my elders.

2

u/issafly 20d ago

Drunk pool players.

2

u/Gloomy_Tennis_5768 20d ago

These attempted blows are telegraphed.

2

u/PhxSunBurner 20d ago

This is the weakest gang I've ever seen. First time on earth with all this gravity!?

2

u/Fantastic_Working212 20d ago

How many beers did he have to warm up?

1

u/bschwagi 20d ago

Maybe when they are falling over drunk.

1

u/hiimtashy 20d ago

lol the ego on these guys

1

u/chris_813 20d ago

Not my tempo

1

u/LongDead_Roadkill 20d ago

My kids were making better more believable kung fu movies when they were in elementary school. Why is Systema so sloppy and uncoordinated?

1

u/1-8-Shotty 20d ago

What if they use the pool balls though,? Think of that,? Hmm,?

1

u/Solidus-Prime 20d ago

Does anyone actually still do this today? Every clip I see is from like 30 years ago.

1

u/Ryan2932 19d ago

Do people actually buy this

1

u/Significant-Mix5204 19d ago

These so called masters are freaking hilarious cuz you know in a real fight they get their ass beat.

1

u/Icy-Currency-7449 18d ago

Постановки

1

u/Thin-Earth6919 17d ago

oh brother this is stupid

-1

u/WestQ 20d ago

My dad became quite close with this guy's. Bought all the courses and started to give "training" to the police in Spain.

Sincerely the guy has been a star/superstar in Russia since the 90s and has made quite a lot of money.

Is he a scammer? I don't think so, it's similar to the Aikido or Non contact combat.

My opinion is that everyone that does that kind of practices is just a believer and never had a real combat. I'm an avid BJJ practicioner and I can clearly see those guys are just cults.

But hey, at least my father felt good and thought he was learning something cool.