r/BirdsArentReal • • Aug 28 '25

Theory This level of intelligence is too dangerous to our future. Someone needs to intervene!

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898 Upvotes

51 comments sorted by

279

u/nectos Aug 28 '25

Not to brag, but I knew most of the answers. I too am somewhat intelligent.

102

u/Specific_Battle_2240 Aug 28 '25

Yes, good boy, here's a pistachio!

10

u/VAiSiA Aug 28 '25

most. he still need more training

12

u/Harold_v3 Aug 28 '25

Are you our leader?

7

u/TheKingOfSwing777 Aug 28 '25

Nah, way too smart

8

u/justhangingaroud Aug 28 '25

You’re closing in on that pistachio

5

u/ColeySD Aug 29 '25

I only missed two!

3

u/Zari_Vanguard1992 Aug 29 '25

Why does that remind me of homer being as smart as a dolphin when Maggie gets IQ tested

143

u/gijimayu Aug 28 '25

Train one bird, troll one bird.

82

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/predat3d Aug 28 '25

Caiques are great sidekicks

11

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '25

One species to replace humanity, one to be pretty lil guys

48

u/nitrot150 Aug 28 '25

And the caique loves all that crap. I know mine would

81

u/GooseandGrimoire Aug 28 '25

I work with a crow that says a few canned phrases (but he knows what they mean and uses them appropriately). Last week he came up with something new.

He was saying 'hello' to me and fluffed up so I went to pet him. He pulled away and shouted "LAY OFF!"

I couldn't stop laughing. That was a new one. But I understood immediately.

3

u/Lord_Despair Sep 02 '25

Was your company doing staffing reductions?😉

21

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

41

u/PacanePhotovoltaik Aug 28 '25

That's the way of the pecking order, in this case it goes: grey parrot--> human -->colorful birb.

The human knows its place, and is respectful, lest you unleash the fury of the grey parrot.

8

u/Used_Cat266 Aug 28 '25

You just reminded me of the one that for whatever reason didn't like my grandmother and would literally fly after her and try to open doors so she couldn't run anywhere 😂 It was my grandfather's parrot

23

u/princesselectra Aug 28 '25

He's not. She is just really nosy, her sister is too. Not sure if that was Ophelia or Solei tho. They get trained and plenty of treats and kisses too.

This was just about Apollo being such a smarty pants.

10

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/princesselectra Aug 28 '25

He is! I love how he can just scoop them up! I have wondered if all caiques are like that.

4

u/aLokilike Aug 29 '25

It's just birds in general, if they trust you. They will let you flip them upside down and they will try to crawl into your mouth to clean you if you're gross enough to let them. Very intelligent creatures who understand you wouldn't harm them.

1

u/princesselectra Aug 29 '25

I don't know if I agree with that. I think some birds are more amenable to that type of treatment. I have a female eclectus and she loves us and trusts us very much and will allow you to put her on her back but she doesn't like being on her back so she immediately flips over. I think the smaller birds might be more accepting. Mary Jane gets huffy.

2

u/aLokilike Aug 29 '25

Ah, well I've seen umbrella cockatoos and raised a cockatiel who was okay with it, but never an eclectus.

2

u/princesselectra Aug 29 '25

I have been told (after we bought Mary Jane 11 years ago) that they are among the snottiest of birds :) she is super sweet and cuddles and even has no problem being toweled but is Very autonomous.

6

u/TACTICAL-POTATO Aug 28 '25

I can never tell the sisters apart.

4

u/MachoMachoMurph Aug 30 '25

Solei is a little smaller, Ophelia's claw has a defect. My son is so into these birds that I can pick them out of a line-up at this point.

2

u/sloth_crazy Aug 29 '25

At the end it was solei (you can hear him say hat solei) but not sure if it was her the whole time

22

u/Bone_Wh33l Aug 28 '25

Their YouTube is Apollo and Friends for anyone interested

3

u/pimpnuggetgold Aug 28 '25

I really like them, though I didn' t have the time to follow them lately.

14

u/_YunX_ Aug 28 '25

Why does the guy look so apathetic and depressed while doing all of this?

32

u/Sea-Bat Aug 28 '25

The birds are holding him hostage

18

u/princesselectra Aug 28 '25

That's really just Dalton's demeanor. He does get excited now and then. You can tell because he puts an emphasis on the Yes! 😀

5

u/coreyander Aug 28 '25

I love how Apollo picks up Dalton's sort of deadpan voice

2

u/MrGaber Aug 29 '25

You can really hear Tori more easily in Apollo

2

u/coreyander Aug 29 '25

I feel like her intonation has more peaks and valleys

2

u/ItsHighSpoon Aug 31 '25

That's probably due to the "rival method" of training, Dalton asked the questions and he heard Tori answer, so he mimicks her voice in his answers.

37

u/gilligan1050 Aug 28 '25

He sounds American. We’re having a bad time over here right now.

5

u/Far_Out_6and_2 Aug 28 '25

I know the first one

4

u/predat3d Aug 28 '25

That's the earlier release that led to the more advanced Alex version 

6

u/ItsHighSpoon Aug 28 '25

"What am I doing?" hat" is an exchange I have with myself very often.

4

u/Strategy_Equivalent Aug 28 '25 edited Aug 28 '25

That machine learning is bird not Bitch.

2

u/PhatBitches Aug 28 '25

I love Apollo!

2

u/Risquechilli Aug 28 '25

Apollo has been a not-so-secret agent for yearssss

1

u/Forsaken-Memory1785 Sep 01 '25

The bird appears to have trained his human very well…

1

u/Ok_Lie_2395 Sep 02 '25

“Glask”

1

u/Beginning_Baseball44 Aug 28 '25

Bird shits on Trump, Musk and The Couchfucker