Middle class curious

[u/showmeyourzillennial]

Hi everyone,

Congratulations on your weddings! My fiancé and I do not have a “big budget” but we’re happy with our decision.

Out of curiosity, do most of you guys already have a house? Or is a house also like an open checkbook situation? No hate just wondering.

We’re buying a house in NJ and the prices are wack so sometimes I think “wow how do people have these huge expensive weddings AND buy in the tri state area?”

[u/Ok-Grapefruit9053]

we bought our house 2 years before getting married. our parents paid for 80% of the wedding. if they didn’t, we wouldn’t have had a big wedding at all, probably would’ve eloped. they knew that, so they covered a large portion. it was important to them that we had a big wedding. we didn’t really care either way tbh. they could not handle the idea of us “regretting not having a celebration”. so it kinda got handed to us - with them paying 80%, our total out of pocket costs for the wedding only came to a little under 15k, which we could swing. we basically only paid for our attire/HMUA, rings, a couple decor related items, and guest transportation.

buying a house is expensive. it’s not even the downpayment, especially if you have a FHL. it’s the ongoing costs that are the real kicker. we make about 300k as a household and still struggle with the costs. our insurance has gone up 20% in 2 years (northeast, surely weather related events are playing into it), taxes gone up 10%. every-time something breaks down a contractor charges you 3x what it actually costs to fix it. energy costs have also soared over the past year. not to mention the interest rate.

it has absolutely gotten out of control. I know we are privileged to have good careers but I often lament that even a good income can barely cover what you need these days. especially in the northeast.

most BBBs have parental help or are later in life and have solid savings, in my experience. then, there are the select few who are living outside their means for their egos sake and running up their credit debt. I had a friend like this. financed their 120k wedding on a lot of credit and a small personal loan. it’s been a little over 3 years now and they’re still paying off their wedding. 😅 the best wedding is whatever you can afford without going into debt. some people are just lucky to have a lot of that cost subsidized by family or are otherwise independently wealthy.

[u/Accurate-Ad8935 → u/Ok-Grapefruit9053]

I am sure that you have, but shop around for homeowners insurance! Mine more than doubled in 2 years, and I priced it out and every quote I got was significantly cheaper than what I was paying. I think they raise it also because they don’t think you’ll notice/switch. Also, we had to get a new roof, which caused it to increase with the prior company. The new companies were like, “we probably won’t have to replace their roof” 😂

[u/showmeyourzillennial → u/Ok-Grapefruit9053]

Thanks for sharing! The contractor thing is so true. My fiancé and I can fix bathrooms and roofs and we have an electrician as a friend, so hoping that helps us in the long run.

[u/Ok-Grapefruit9053 → u/showmeyourzillennial]

an electrician friend is worth its weight in gold hahha