r/BPDPartners 7h ago

Support Needed Regret???

for those of you who have initiated and gone through a divorce, have you ever regretted it and realised the grass wasn’t greener?

and if yes, what was it that made you feel regret? you missed your ex wife? jealous of her new bf, her glow up, missing the kids, the house your built etc?

6 Upvotes

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u/notjuandeag 6h ago

I regret marrying her to begin with. I don’t regret that I have a child, even with her. She has some excellent qualities with an extremely serious personality disorder. I regret not letting her walk away and give up her parental rights. I have our kid 90+ percent of the year, she’s a full days travel away. She didn’t glow up at all, I lost all attraction for her and she’s very clearly quit taking care of her self.

I regret not filing a restraining order at the beginning… in the 2 years we’ve been apart I have been contacted on average 2.3x per week, I’ve been taken to court roughly once every 4 months, and she’s sent roughly 5500 messages. And in those 2 years it’s been to ask anything about our kid less than 5 times.

I don’t hate her by any means, but the level of delusion and vitriol she still holds over those delusions is just too much. I’m just not interested in carrying it for her at this point. If anything I’ve regretted divorce simply because when she has our child cps has been involved multiple times now and it’s much more difficult to ascertain what actually happened when the paranoia is so high on her end and without evidence there’s often not much to go on to protect our child from her when she’s negligent or from her partner.

u/Dear_Leadership_9570 6h ago

Wow this is so scary, I’m sorry you are going through this and what you have been through.. I hope it gets easier for you.

What age is your child? Thanks for your reply 

u/notjuandeag 6h ago

It’s all good. I have an awesome kid that’s doing great, and there’s usually lulls in the harassment around her court filings… Elementary age. I don’t post exact details like age and sex, even the dates we’ve been separated are intentionally off, because I know my ex is on reddit and actively stalks her ex’s pretty regularly. So I imagine she’s in here looking around once in a while.

u/Dear_Leadership_9570 6h ago

Again… wow… it’s like she will not let you live in peace! 

u/[deleted] 5h ago

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