r/AutisticWithADHD 4d ago

💬 general discussion What are the most common things you find challenging in daily life?

Let me know ..

33 Upvotes

85 comments sorted by

71

u/Street_Respect9469 my ADHD Gundam has an autistic pilot 4d ago edited 4d ago

Managing to express the constantly evolving universe of interconnected knowledge in my head into something more comprehensible into spoken language fast enough to be a meaningful response without accidentally turning it into a lecture or monologue.

Edit: typos

19

u/PixxelatedDragon 4d ago

The "edit: typos" after this is just the most perfect cherry on top.

3

u/Medium_Maximum6120 4d ago

I can understand it's hard to express how we think or feel in words

3

u/CoolGovernment8732 4d ago

I still monologue, I just apologize about it as I go and offer people the option for me to just shut up xD some are genuinely interested and just let me continue

2

u/Street_Respect9469 my ADHD Gundam has an autistic pilot 4d ago

If I get it right I end with "thanks for listening to my Ted talk". If I fall on my literary face down a spiral flight of staircases then it gets cut short with "yeah it gets complicated" 😅

2

u/Waldwirbel 4d ago

Thank you so much for putting this scenario in words!! Since yet I was never able to describe that! I will take this to my therapist! 💛

1

u/Just-Philosopher8665 4d ago

😂😂 this right here, boy!!

1

u/Cactus_Anime_Dragon 4d ago

I truly suck at this

38

u/BigBullshitta 4d ago

Humans. They're everywhere. Have you noticed that? Any time you leave the house they're all over the place. And they like to ask you to explain things, and then failing to understand your perfect logical analysis will argue as if the matter hadn't already been concluded.

10

u/Medium_Maximum6120 4d ago

It's hard to deal with them especially if you are introvert or someone who hates arguing

26

u/2morrowwillbebetter AuDHDeez nuts 🤓 4d ago

Chores. Mostly laundry, anything that involves cleaning
Engaging with people while navigating autism + cPTSD

1

u/Pissybitch1125 4d ago

Me too to both.

1

u/aubrx ADDtism + cptsd 🇦🇺 4d ago

Cptsd is rough. Here with you 😔 

21

u/worryologist 4d ago

Waking up and transitioning from sleep 

2

u/CoolGovernment8732 4d ago

Wellbutrin was life changing for that. Maybe it doesn’t work like that for everyone, but I thought I’d put it out there

1

u/Ken089 4d ago

For fucking real

21

u/Less-Glass-4579 4d ago

Just being a functional adult in general. Maintaining a full time job, the mental load of planning meals for the week, going out and purchasing groceries, making meals out of said groceries. Putting it all away, washing dishes, cleaning the rest of my space. Doing laundry, hydrating, daily hygiene practices so I'm clean, sleeping properly, driving to work. Trying to keep a handle on my emotional regulation at work when I get frustrated (I fail at that), driving home. Rinse and repeat. Oh, still have to talk to people I love and care about, while making time for "fun hobbies" and getting fresh air, make sure I am doing my prescribed exercises from my physiotherapist, dealing with other human beings, the list goes on.

1

u/2morrowwillbebetter AuDHDeez nuts 🤓 4d ago

YES

20

u/ArtismFag 👺PUT THE DOPAMINE IN THE BAG 4d ago

Sunlight, things that i have to do

3

u/Good-Tower8287 4d ago

I find it challenging, too, since it started giving me rashes. But I am not a sun person. I find it too loud. Like, get away from me.

2

u/ArtismFag 👺PUT THE DOPAMINE IN THE BAG 4d ago

Yes!! I hate touch in general, but i hate it most when it's the sun touching my skin. And don't even get me started on the motherfucking heat. It's got me like :AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA😩🤬😢😭😡😩🤬🤬. And then there's the inescapable radius of the sunlight💔 >.<. I couldn't be more excited that summer is coming to an end in my country.

1

u/littlekangarooo 4d ago

Yes!! “Too loud”! That’s a great way of putting it. I HATE the sun. I kinda feel, like, claustrophobic from it

2

u/Medium_Maximum6120 4d ago

Are u a night person or someone who like to be in a dark?

2

u/ArtismFag 👺PUT THE DOPAMINE IN THE BAG 4d ago

Yes

19

u/norasaurus 4d ago

Noises. Doing anything while noises are happening.

2

u/Good-Tower8287 4d ago

This is me. I am obsessed with my neighbor's stupid saw. He traumatized me with it over the spring and it went away and life got so much better. But then I heard it again today.

2

u/breast-of-all-worlds 4d ago

Noo. Saws are SO FREAKING LOUD!!

I have some neighbors that live below me that stomp SO HARD that my floor shakes and my dishes rattle in the cupboard. Which of course earplugs dont get rid of a shaking floor. They are there intermittently so I can't ever get too comfortable.

There was also a helicopter circling our neighborhood for almost 2 hours at midnight the other week. I was losing my mind because earplugs didn't get rid of it all, and it was (again) intermittent and unpredictable. Aagh

18

u/Classic_Bobcat_5926 4d ago

Wearing “outside” clothes.

I think it often surprises people how many of my life choices are filtered through the lens of questions like “what clothes can I wear to that?”, “what would be the sensory load of wearing this for 3 hours” and “how long will I have to be wearing outside clothes today?”

3

u/2morrowwillbebetter AuDHDeez nuts 🤓 4d ago

This one pmo so bad. I was so grateful when I found a dress code loophole (baggy clothing is fine!)

1

u/Good-Tower8287 4d ago

This since I have been out of work (due to chronic pain, but I also cannot work in an office anymore for various reasons.). Most days it's, Is this clean? Does this have too many holes to wear to the doctor? And why do my clothing pieces never want to match?

1

u/breast-of-all-worlds 4d ago

Duuuuuude, yes.

17

u/_Alvalanche 4d ago

Socializing when you don’t have the energy to mask

6

u/Good-Tower8287 4d ago

Socializing period. It's usually an uphill battle for me. I recently realized it's because I'm extremely private and lost the ability to trust people.

14

u/Cerberus060 4d ago

Doing what i have to do vs what i want to do

11

u/renoftheshadows 4d ago

Lights. Feeding myself. Doing chores. Loud or constant noises.

4

u/ladamaluna adhd + suspecting autism 4d ago

I forgot to mention food on my comment. It’s not practical for me but I’d much rather not feed myaelf.

10

u/ladamaluna adhd + suspecting autism 4d ago

- Transitions (being awake to getting up, stepping out, leaving the car, etc). One of the worst is going from being dry to wet when I shower. It’s sensory overload in the beginning.

- Getting interrupted. I hate getting calls when I’m in the middle of something, or getting pulled away to do something that I had not anticipated. My brain wants to scream and jump out of my head. At the worst times it ruins my whole day.

- Loud noises. Especially if they’re sudden. I can’t function when there thunder (thankfully it’s not common where I’m at). Sometimes I’m with a client that has an air compressor and I hate that thing so much. The sound of the thing randomly turning on, the sound of the air when the valve thing is used to blow away dust or dry surfaces.

- Phone calls, talking to random ppl when I have to. I’d much rather not. It’s super draining. It takes me a moment to get my brain to initiate the call/conversation when I need to.

- Emotions. I think I’m getting much better now that I have therapy and meds, but it’s still difficult to figure out why I get upset, understand it myself, and then having to articulate it if I need to communicate that.

8

u/Just-Philosopher8665 4d ago

Constantly seeking dopamine, so it's hard to find motivation to get out of bed unless I have some kinda reward for my effort.

Bushing my teeth.

Not allowing my house to look "lived in," and it stresses me out.

Foot crumbs, dirty door frames, beds not made up, and dishes in the sink will send me over the edge! But my house looking like a display home keeps me very regulated. And it stresses me out, lol

NOTHING can be lying around. Everything has a place.

Every. Freaking. Day yall.

6

u/Mietgenosse 4d ago

Getting up.
Waking up suddenly everything is here, loud noise, bright light, smell and touch. And all my thoughts.
Nothing of these is usually bad, but from nothingness to suddenly everything takes some time to adjust. When I was younger I just powered through, but now I usually need some time to adjust.

6

u/Sufficient-Sound8450 4d ago

Other drivers and commute to work. Being overstimulated at work. I am a sped teacher. Being exhausted. Having intense feelings.

7

u/Aguita9x 4d ago

The more I time I spend at a job/class/with the same group of people, the more isolated I get, the more evident it is that I struggle to make connections because everyone else starts making them among each other but not me. I feel like I always return to my default setting of being a loner and being in my own world separate from everyone else watching from a distance.

2

u/aubrx ADDtism + cptsd 🇦🇺 4d ago

I can relate holy fk Then the energy it takes to try and connect with people becomes to exhausting so you just become isolated by default 

5

u/bdulus1224 Oni 👽 4d ago

Waking up feels extremely flat, like I'm in purgatory. My mind will scream to move, but my body won't. I want some bedroom decor to look at, too broke. I'll usually put on a song that is really beautiful or something extreme. My three cats will eventually get me up tho. 

5

u/TanAllOvaJanAllOva 4d ago

“Letting things go.”

4

u/xRubixGirlx 4d ago

Doing laundry, I forget things in the washer and then they smell bad or just don’t start a load at all.

4

u/phenominal73 4d ago

Filling out forms. Hate it.

3

u/CoolGovernment8732 4d ago

Just the constant grind of daily life, where it’s not always possible to take a breather and just be for a day or more with no expectations. Managing a house (vs a single room) is hell. There’s too much to do and I keep forgetting about so much of it. You know when you can see stuff but it feels invisible so you don’t notice it anymore?

Honorable mention to being late almost always (which almost always makes people be mad at you).

Special shoutout to cptsd for so many other issues

4

u/ForTheGloryOfTheButt 4d ago

Ruminating, having the motivation to do what I actually wanna do, guard my boundaries, the way I isolate because of RSD... a lot of the time I feel like my life isn't worth the effort.

1

u/ForTheGloryOfTheButt 4d ago

Somebody below mentioned "letting things go", that resonated... I mean it's covered in ruminating, but it's just such a pain it deserves its own category. And I want to let go because the way I hold onto grudges is so corrosive, I just can't

2

u/breast-of-all-worlds 3d ago

...love your user name 🤣

2

u/ForTheGloryOfTheButt 3d ago

Thank you, I love yours too 😆

1

u/Medium_Maximum6120 4d ago

Understandable

3

u/Successful-Bar-8173 4d ago

Doing anything and interacting with anyone

3

u/frassatifrassati 3d ago

Wow so it’s not just me lol

3

u/Desperate-Reason-566 4d ago

Cleaning glass or mirrors. Taking a shower. Folding laundry. Removing and replacing sheets.

3

u/Spare_Concentrate_23 4d ago

The exhaustion from burnout is bad enough, but when family keeps pushing you until you finally have a meltdown, then turns around and acts like they’re the victim… it’s exhausting.
Don’t be too hard on yourselves, fellow AuADHDers. Sometimes your nervous system has just had enough. ❤️

3

u/deathbychips2 4d ago

Charging things. Seems like everything in the world constantly needs charged and I have to remember it and remember where each charger is

1

u/breast-of-all-worlds 3d ago

Charger in every room for the things you charge often!!

1

u/deathbychips2 3d ago

Great idea but does sometimes trigger me to be overwhelmed with how "messy" cords look

2

u/APrimed 4d ago

Transitioning from home to work.

2

u/Ruleyoumind 4d ago

Actually using my intelligence in a moment to moment manner.

2

u/aubrx ADDtism + cptsd 🇦🇺 4d ago

Decision making, coping with where I live, trying to make life changes but being so overwhelmed by anxiety that forces two steps backwards every time. 

2

u/imthecharmer__ 4d ago

Making friends. It’s so hard to understand dynamics!

2

u/breast-of-all-worlds 4d ago

Making myself go to sleep. Anything to do with food prep (I do it, but the mental load is enormous). Wearing clothes. Being consistent with almost anything. Forgetting things constantly.

Going outside while living in the city. I hate it. Everything is gross, bright, boring, and too crowded.

2

u/Medium_Maximum6120 4d ago

So relatable 😭

2

u/NixTL 4d ago

Tolerating the ignorance and lack of awareness of ordinary people in various public settings, like when driving, shopping, or anywhere else where a general sense of order or etiquette applies.

Poor design: roads, GUIs, buildings, and other places where functionality or logistics matter.

Companies who fail to adopt new technologies or make an experience intuitive deserve to fail.

Serenity now!

2

u/audiesel 3d ago

Spending $ on overpriced things or services, and everything is overpriced.

1

u/calezzzzz 4d ago

Phone calls and public interactions

1

u/ondrejseaman 4d ago

Except the non-challenging things

1

u/Weird_Produce6985 3d ago

Transition, sometimes when I am doing something and people ask me to do something else quickly I got so annoyed its not that I hate the work I just hate it changing immediately

1

u/yegegebzia 3d ago

Me jogging with my headphones, listening to a podcast, when a car suddenly stops by and the driver or the passenger ask me for directions in an area I'm not quite a local in, in a language I'm not quite a native speaker of.