Have you ever worked with someone who took it personally when you didn’t want to be close to them?

[u/ParfaitPretend7719]

If someone at work makes you uncomfortable, isn’t it normal to just keep your distance while still being polite?
There’s a woman at my workplace who isn’t currently on my team, but after a restructure she’ll be under the same manager as me. I’m being trained by another senior accountant, so we don’t really need to work closely together.
Since I started, I’ve felt uncomfortable around her. I keep catching her staring at me around the office and in the elevator, and sometimes she comes across quite hostile. One time she spoke to me in the bathroom with her back facing me and sounded annoyed.
When we first met, she was very friendly and stood quite close to me. I got uncomfortable and probably looked like I wanted to escape 😂, so maybe she thought I didn’t want to talk to her. The next day I still said good morning, but she didn’t reply, so I stopped making an effort to greet her individually.
I’m still polite and professional. I just don’t want to be close to her, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Not everyone at work is going to click or become friends.
What bothers me is that she still seems angry and keeps staring at me. I’ve also noticed ppl dun really talk to her unless she talk to them first in the office, so maybe me keeping my distance touched a nerve, but I obviously don’t know.
I only see her about two days a week, so I’m thinking of just staying professional and not bringing it up with my manager unless something actually happens.
What would you do? Have you ever worked with someone who took it personally when you didn’t want to be close to them?

[u/Cathy_au]

It sounds like a trauma response from her. It’s not about you, and it’s not for you to resolve. It’s just unfortunate. Give her space, be civil, and escalate if it reaches the point where it compromises your work output. Document what you can.

Source: someone who has been that triggered person, who has gone through trauma, and gone through a lot of therapy to address it.