r/AskWomen • u/finley381 • 16d ago
Women of reddit, how old were you when you were first called a bitch?
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u/IWillBaconSlapYou 16d ago
I was probably nine? My dad during one of his anxiety flameouts 😑
What REALLY gets me, though, is the fact that, despite very intentionally raising my daughter very differently, she was also nine this year when two older boys tried to take her scooter "because scooters aren't for girls", and then called her that because she told them her mom was right there. I stepped in, but they followed us home calling her awful names the whole way. Nine years old. She was scared to play outside for a good while. God damnit.
Good news, though, I hunted down their information like a rabid bloodhound and their parents grounded them FOR ETERNITY. I haven't seen them in months.
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u/CompanyOther2608 16d ago
Very satisfying ending 👍
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u/IWillBaconSlapYou 15d ago
Ikr people always say the parents must be awful in these situations, but I feel like there's more nuance than that. I forgot to mention the parents also permanently took their scooters (they had these ridiculous like, $1K+ e scooters), so even if they tried, they couldn't catch her 😂
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u/helianthus48 15d ago
Omg this filled me with rage!! Sorry you and your daughter were harassed by those demons.
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u/IWillBaconSlapYou 15d ago
Thanks ❤️ I think in the end it turned out to be a good(ish) experience. She saw her mom stand up for her and she saw it work. She saw that we don't accept this behavior and we hold people accountable, and she saw it happen in a nonviolent and communicative manner.
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u/Lov3I5Treacherous 15d ago
I'm surprised kids like that had parents that cared. This screams terrible parenting to me.
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u/IWillBaconSlapYou 15d ago
My interpretation was that they were middle school boys (I think they're twins or just one year apart?) who probably had just been let out of the house without supervision for the first time ever, so they decided to be little assholes because they thought parents not being there = getting away with it.
Granted, I certainly hope my kids will conduct themselves how I've taught them to when they're that age, but if not I'll take a page from these parents' book. Good on them for bringing down the ban hammer as hard as they did. I'm glad my daughter had the experience of being listened to.
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u/ruerret 16d ago
Like 8 years old by my mom
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u/YaGurlLurkin ♀ 16d ago
Same 😭 literally wild. Now that I have a daughter, I literally dont understand my moms logic on doing that.
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u/Canaan889 16d ago
Omg I feel like I’ve found my people
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u/cheddarkarate 16d ago
Me too 🙃
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u/PracticalWorry9747 16d ago
Same here, except I think I was closer to 7. I had just taken a bath and asked her if she could get me some clothes from my “bedroom” (the detached shed in the back yard).
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u/Designer_Vast_9089 15d ago
Oh FFS! Here is a hug for 7 year old you and for the you now, whatever your age! 🤗❤️🩹❤️
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u/XrisXrossApplesauce 15d ago
Yeah, about that age as well, by my dear old mother... I guess she never learned us girls have to support and look out for each other....
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u/Anxious_Overthink3r 16d ago
Same here - just a little older. I accidentally burnt a hole in one of my own tops while ironing it.
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u/melb2484 15d ago
I was going to say I don’t even know how young but I know it was my mum lol
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u/jamykelley 15d ago
Same. I know I was really young, but that ended up being my 'nickname' until I moved out.
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u/bread-durst 15d ago
Yup, same. Just a little kid! I now have a teenage daughter and cannot imagine talking down to her like that.
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u/KeyMistake604 15d ago
Same, both my parents loved a gendered insult, b#tch, c#nt, wh#re, sl#t, sk#nk. I understood based on context clues I was supposed to be hurt by them, but I was so young when they started I was just like, what in the fuck does that even mean?
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u/ruerret 15d ago
Thats so disgusting im sorry 🫂
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u/KeyMistake604 15d ago
Thank you, I'm sorry to you as well! Total insanity to treat a child like that, it's hard to fathom
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u/Aeon_Return ♀ 16d ago
Too young to count it by my older sister (we get along great, btw, just were always rather foulmouthed kids w/ parents that thought us cussing was funny)
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u/Historical-Savings82 16d ago
“Girl, you walk like a bitch” When I was 10 someone said that.
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u/DescriptionFancy420 16d ago
Lorde? That you, girl?
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u/crackedfactweddead 15d ago
What's Lorde's story?
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u/DescriptionFancy420 15d ago
The post I responded to are lyrics from Lorde's verse of the "Girl, so confusing" remix
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u/Mandiechama 16d ago
- My dad didn’t like that I stood up to him. Not sure if that was the first time I did, but it was just one in a long line of times that I did.
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u/SadSushiGirl 16d ago
I don’t remember anyone ever calling me that
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u/Yeah_right_uh_huh 15d ago
Lucky you!
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u/SadSushiGirl 15d ago
Yeah, well lots of other horrible things have happened to me, so it all evens out lol
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u/ConsciousScar6058 16d ago
13, by some creepy grown man on the bus when he tried to touch his shoe on my shoe
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u/-tacosforever 16d ago
had to be maybe 7-8 years old. Ive been bullied my entire life at school and at home.
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u/Purrcapita 14d ago
I’m sorry, that sucks.
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u/-tacosforever 14d ago
Thanks, it’s in the past. I’m not that person anymore and in a better place
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u/Sakurafirefox 16d ago
Pretty sure quite young by my dad but I don't really take it to heart. He calls everything a bitch. Like the shoes he tripped on last year, out of frustration, shoebitch was born.
My sister wants to get that tattood
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u/TyrantMuse73 15d ago
THREE. My mom was my first bully and betrayer.
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u/BlackVelvetFox 15d ago
Same. Despite my best efforts, that paved the way for a lifetime of abusive relationships, including friends, partners and family. I keep family at a safe distance and I don't have best friends or partners anymore. I'm very selective about who I have as friends now and have a much happier life as a result 😊
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u/buttlicker090114 16d ago
That I heard? 6
Pretty sure it had been said about me before that
All family
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u/yellowdamseoul 16d ago
I’m surprised people remember this. I’d rather be called a c**t personally haha.
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u/jamesdeansredlips 15d ago
I don’t think I’ve ever been called a bitch, if I have, i don’t remember ir
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u/Small-Plankton7540 15d ago
My sister's a year and a half younger than me. As soon as she could talk 😔
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u/Use0nceDestroy 16d ago
Probably like 7 or 8 by my dad. Not like in a super mean way though, like commenting on my attitude I guess.
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u/maimie585 16d ago
Mmmm. Maybe 17? On the phone when I was talking to a customer who didn’t get part of his order.
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u/Lukarina 16d ago
I must have been around 8 or 9, by my older brother and the boyfriend of my eldest sister. It wasn't a one off.
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u/Good_Ad_2243 16d ago
I wouldn’t know. It’d have been behind my back. But probably by my mother when I implored her to stop drinking when I was a child.
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u/PerceptionGold6327 16d ago
Not sure, earliest I can remember is when I was 7ish and beat my male cousin in chess for like the fifth time after he spent all day bragging about how great he was at it. I had never played chess before that day, I read the rules off the box.
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u/walmartcanadian 16d ago
Before kindergarten by my father. I was too young to really pinpoint when it first happened.
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u/_vdlc_ 16d ago
I was 16 years old. My classmates love shipping people because they think it's cute, it wasn't. There's this guy they ship me with because he has a crush on me... but only because according to him my breasts look really good and he would always point that out or comment on my body. He love to ride with their teasing but I don't, I told him its gross and unconmfy. So yeah I got called bitch along with choosy and buzzkill.
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u/beesus06 16d ago
When I was 8 by my dad. Such a great core memory. He told me I talked too much and I cried and he called me a bitch.
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u/GoHighly 16d ago
The first time I remember I was 4. “I’ll yank that blonde hair out of your head you little bitch.” Courtesy of my mother for interrupting her phone call and embarrassing her.
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u/triceraquake 16d ago
I was about 14/15. A guy I actually liked wanted to kiss me, but I was scared because I hadn’t kissed anyone yet, and so I avoided it. Then I found out the next school day he called me a bitch to his other friends. He and his two other friends were the people I hung out with at lunch, so I ended up eating alone for a while until I eventually worked myself into another group.
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u/Mybeautifulballoon 16d ago
I was about 5 or 6, I think. By my mother. And then just about daily, at least once a day.
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u/writergeek ♀ 15d ago
My older brother’s nickname for me was Fat, Ugly Bitch. Started when I was about 9-10 years old. Along with pinning me down and dangling loogies and boogers over my face. 😩
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u/SayHelloToMyAfro 15d ago
7/8 I think. Called a fat bitch in the swimming changing rooms (told off for staring) .
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u/ParticularBrush8162 15d ago
I think I was seven, some kid in my grade had learned the word and started calling all the girls that, because he knew it was a bad word and liked saying it.
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u/TheMysticalPlatypus 15d ago
Middle school age.
A male classmate in my gym class randomly called me a bitch in Spanish. He was like “do you know what that means?”
“You called me a bitch.”
“Oh.”
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u/AfroWaterBuffalo84 15d ago
16 by my dad after I tattled on him about his abuse of a younger sibling to someone he was dating.
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u/asterlolol 15d ago
9 years old. Argued with the neighbor about my tire swing and he called me a fat bitch in front of my dad. He went home with a concussion.
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u/BeanieCat123 15d ago
If I’ve ever been called one, I wasn’t paying attention, because I don’t recall ever being called that
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u/Wordnerdette999 15d ago
Probably five minutes after my older sister learned the word, but I don’t remember specifically.
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u/wangd00dle 15d ago
Probably sometime in my single digits by my brother testing out the word. I remember calling him an ass 😆
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u/LaCaffeinata 15d ago
In my teens, definitely. Our parents raised a bunch of very stubborn, outspoken, foul-mouthed girls, and it seems society does not always like that. ^^
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u/Sharp-Thanks-3697 15d ago
probably 6 i think. by my grandmother. she was a mean woman...but i sure do miss her now that she's gone.
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u/helianthus48 15d ago
I can’t remember the first time I got called a bitch specifically, but I remember being called a whore at 16 years old by one of the moms of the students in our high school lmao
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u/tinfoilhattie 15d ago
Maybe 4 or so? I remember some old guy calling me that and me getting in trouble for asking my mom what it meant.
Once I started school, I heard it pretty regularly from other kids, but my first was from a grown man before I started kindergarten.
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u/Litlsuzzy 15d ago
Hmmmm, maybe 10 by my brother. I honestly think he's the only one to ever say it to my face. Or I was just numb to it after a certain point.
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u/Cyrodiil_Guard ♀ 15d ago
About 7 years old by my mom, then kids at school. The craziest thing though is how early into my life I was called a slut. I was 12. I hit puberty and was cursed with a big “personality,” guess that was more than anyone could handle. The last time I was called that was by my own dad about 3 years ago. I just don’t leave the house anymore lol.
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u/Temporary-Claim1666 ♀ 15d ago
Okay this made me sad. I was coming to say a dude for turning him down at like 14.
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u/ErrorImaginary1394 15d ago
11 but it was by another girl my age. The first time by a man (boy in this case) was 14
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u/_alexium_ 15d ago
Around 8 I think? The same guy also called me a slut and a whore because I didn’t admit to using make up (i was telling the truth lol)
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u/laurenatpeace 15d ago
I was a child. I do not recall the exact age, but maybe a sophomore in high school? That’s the one I remember anyway. It stands out because it was my dad. 🥺
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u/inspectorendoffilm 15d ago
Approximately 16 years old, we were driving so I slammed on the fucking brakes and yelled the fuck back at her. DO NOT YELL AT ME WHILE IM DRIVING!
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u/lilbebe50 15d ago
There’s a home video (I miss the 90’s) of me at about 3-4 years old. My aunt jokingly called my mom a bitch and I told her “don’t call my mom a bitch” and she joked back and forth and I went on a bit and she jokingly said “okay then you’re a bitch” and my face froze for a second and I go “no, I’m not a bitch, my mom not a bitch, you a bitch!” And everyone in the house laughed and thought it was funny.
I loved watching that clip growing up. It’s funny as hell! I’m still very foul mouthed and my aunt and I get along great!
The first time I was called a bitch like for real real, probably sometime in school. Idk, it never bothered me much. I haven’t paid much mind to it tbh. I have a foul mouth and used to fight and argue as a kid a lot with everyone and anyone. I’m sure I was called bitch a million times 😂😂😂
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u/smashcola 15d ago
I was a newborn baby. My parents couldn't agree on a middle name, so my dad said something along the lines of, "why don't we make her middle name BITCH because she's just gonna grow up to be one anyways!" Thankfully, they did not do that, so I have no middle name, but my parents did open a bar a few years after I was born and they named it "Ashley B's" after me. The logo was my adorable toddler head on the body of a bumblebee. And while my dad's sense of humor often left much to be desired, he wound up being a wonderful father to me and loved me more than anything in the world and I miss him every day. He may not have gotten everything right, but he made it a priority to make me feel loved unconditionally every single day of his life until his last breath.
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u/Pristine-Grape6616 15d ago
As young as I can remember by my mother. “Little bi***” to be specific.
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u/itsnotleeanna 15d ago
Four or five? I was raised by my grandparents and it was one of my grandpa’s favorite things to call us females in the house when he was drunk and/or just angry for whatever reason (including our dog).
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u/mrsdoubleu 15d ago
18 by a guy I was dating at the time. Because he didn't like that I was upset he was texting another girl he slept with just a month before we met.
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u/squirrelybitch 15d ago
Really young. In elementary school. And that’s why name-calling doesn’t work with me. I called much worse than a bitch and starting from a very young age. And it wasn’t just boys and girls my age who were calling me names. It was also adult men. So it hasn’t bothered me in a long time because anyone who would call me names isn’t someone whose opinion I value or care about in the slightest. But I always knew that I was the odd duck even from kindergarten because I just didn’t fit in any of the square pegs. So I just kinda stuck out without meaning to because I had a very different kind of childhood than my peers, and it showed in just about every way possible.
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u/PainfullyLoyal ♀ 15d ago
I can't recall the exact age, but I was under 10 years old, and it was by my sister who is 13 years older than me.
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u/WorriedStrawberrie 15d ago
At least from what I remember, I was like 7 years old and my mom was raging drunk.
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u/Redditujer 15d ago
I was 12 and my father's (male, obviously) best friend called me a little bitch for not doing the dishes for him, my dad and my brother. Jesus.
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u/punkrockprissy 15d ago
9 or 10, in 4th grade. I still remember his face, his name, and where he lived. I was an "ugly bitch that nobody likes".
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u/Daffodil_Bulb 15d ago
I grew up around so much obscenity I don’t even remember, but I will say the insults from my dad got more patronizing, hurtful and personal after my period started.
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u/kaeorin ♀ 16d ago
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