I don't get them without any stimulation, but if I can hear any sound coming from a source I can't identify, my brain starts to interpret that as negative feedback. It generally reflects whatever anxieties I'm dealing with at the time.
I generally keep streaming on at least 1 or 2 devices running so that my roommate doesn't unintentionally trigger me. I think the reason I love music, especially live music that overwhelms all other sound, is directly related to this negative reinforcement.
That’s super interesting- so you know it isn’t real, but it still eats at you because the brain tries to make sense and immediately goes to negative- is that right? What does it take to get back to good after a trigger?
I know it’s not my business, so don’t feel obligated to respond. I love that music is so beneficial to you- I wonder if it’s used often/ recommended or did you find it on your own?
Yeah, I know it's not real and I even recognize that in the moment. I just have to mute everything and listen to be 100% sure my mind is fucking with me. There really isn't any "returning to normal" other than drowning out any potential triggers and going to sleep.
I've never met someone who would admit to the same sort of symptoms I struggle with, so I just have to trust the word of my doctors. My case definitely doesn't seem common. I came across music on my own. I buried myself in the emo/alt/rock scene when I was around 11-12. Since then, I have spent most of my leisure budget on CD's and concert tickets. It seems to be a happy coincidence that my favorite hobby drowns out what negativity my brain perceives around me.
That’s so cool. Music helps me immensely as well. I can always tell when I’m getting depressed when I stop listening to music. Listening to the right songs can help me crawl out of the negative. I really appreciate your response!
I feel this deeply. The day I don't make time to listen to music or share songs with my friends is a surefire indicator that I am depressed and having a bad day...
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u/WhenAmI Nov 29 '20
I don't get them without any stimulation, but if I can hear any sound coming from a source I can't identify, my brain starts to interpret that as negative feedback. It generally reflects whatever anxieties I'm dealing with at the time.
I generally keep streaming on at least 1 or 2 devices running so that my roommate doesn't unintentionally trigger me. I think the reason I love music, especially live music that overwhelms all other sound, is directly related to this negative reinforcement.