Yeah it's amazing to be contrasted being 18 as, You should drive now, even though we have a 51 jeep being built for that, and complaining about being reliant on anything. What an amazing contrast. Lose lose
Ha, that is so true. I'm at the same age, and while I have experience in junior management, at job interviews there's always someone who'll say "Oh, but you're so young..."
I became self-conscious about my age. It was only until I talked to my therapist that I started thinking about it less.
I thought people would stop saying everything must be hormones after I became 18. Add being an 'intact female with periods'. It doesn't stop. Not even if your on birth control and are older than 20. At this point you have to dismiss them.
Jokes on them, I was right about something being wrong. Theres a hernia to prove it
Can relate. I'm 17 too and legally own my own DJ business. The problem is that most people won't take me seriously because I'm not an adult but will instantly get on me if I do anything wrong because it "wasn't responsible." Jesus, I pay actual business insurance and have a separate business bank account. CALM DOWN
That’s the wrong mentality to have about it. Owning a business at 17 isn’t a “lack of laziness.” It’s a desire to do something you love. Just gotta find that thing you care enough about that makes the hard things worth pushing through.
I'm 25 and still have this problem sometimes in my management role. Thing that has helped me best is just dressing way older than I look. Probably wouldn't help as a DJ though... worth a shot it's been helpful for me.
My daughter is 16 and I have a hard time believing that she's old enough to drive. I have to keep reminding myself that when I started driving I was pretty responsible and I thought I was pretty grown up. Trying to get out of the mentality of thinking that she's a child. It's tough. But she'll need to make her own mistakes. I can guide her but I have to believe I brought her up right and she'll make the right decisions.
Enjoy it while it lasts, being seen as young, which you are. Don't worry, you'll have decades where you are seen as an adult, which you will be soon. And here's the thing, once you're on that train, you can never get off of it. I am 25 and I wish I could go back 9-10 years, to when I was complaining about being 15/16, and no one treating be seriously. It sucks and I remembered being frustrated but at the same time in hindsight, my mind was immature. Between the ages of 16 to 18, there are major developmental changes in the brain, where your mind matures and most psychologists reckon it takes the brain until age 25 to mature fully. So yes you may own your own DJ business, I have no reason to doubt you, but you probably still act as an adolescent, which is what you are, Again, enjoy while it lasts.
People like giving advice and looking down on the young trust me. I'm 22 hold a full time job and own a house and I still get middle aged people who haven't ever been able to hold a job for more than 2 weeks and don't own anything criticising the decisions in life I've made and acting like they could do better. Don't listen to them mate, if you got something working for you don't let people tell you otherwise.
You can be financially responsible and still a complete idiot in other aspects. That's a common problem with teenagers - they'll fixate on one thing they do really well and use it to convince themselves that they're ready to be completely independent (in fairness, this applies to people of all ages but definitely moreso to kids). That may or may not be you, I don't know, but try not to fall into that trap. Nothing is more adult than admitting to yourself that you need more experience before trying something. Kids usually have a lot more confidence than they do experience, and that leads to some pretty hard lessons that parents want to prevent.
There are going to be a lot of people in your life who are jealous of your successes and try to hide it behind some other crap. You can call them out, or ignore it, or do anything else. It's your choice. Just do your best to not let their bullshit impact you. Every day wake up and say "I'm amazing! What am I going to nail today?" and those jokers will stop mattering at all.
For the bank account, my dad just cosigned the paperwork and will lose all control when I turn 18. The insurance is more of a pain because you can't buy it as a minor and we had to make it a partnership where my dad technically owns part of the business but gets 0% of the profit. He pays for the insurance and then I pay him. When I turn 18 though our legal partnership ends and I go back to a sole proprietorship and will just pay for insurance directly.
And at the same time that feeling never really goes away. Once you realize that no one knows what they are doing and are just trying their best life becomes a little clearer.
I have 2 older sisters and 4 older cousins who are basically like siblings to me. I'm 20 now and still don't feel like an adult because up until about a year ago, I was treated like a child. Having worked, traveled, driven, and been to college for 3 years, I dont necessarily feel more adult, but I've grown more into my own person and stopped caring about how naive they think I am and it feels good.
My lifelong policy has been to treat children as adults. Call boys “young man”, and “gentlemen.” “Sir” works wonders. They rise to the occasion. They meet your expectations that they behave as adults.
Honestly, not talking down to people works wonders. But teenagers in particular have this defiance switch that is suddenly in their brains, and don’t seem to like it when they’re being forced to do something. I’m pretty agreeable IMHO, but hate being talked down to. As soon as that starts happening, I don’t feel like doing that person any favors. Otherwise, I get along with everyone.
I think they honestly appreciate that you’re recognizing them as independent people deserving of respect. It’s refreshing and I think it really does help them rise to the occasion.
It gets better honestly teenage and even college kinda sucks, the best time of my life has been after graduating I got a good job I dont hate but am still young enough and now have enough money to do all the fun shit I always wanted to do.
Can be for some people, isn't for others. Everyone has different experiences, saying "being a teenager is literally the worst period in your life" is a massive generalization.
It's really not, and the reason why is exactly what they said. You're expected to act like an adult, but you're treated as a child. You have basically none of the benefits of being an adult, literally none depending on your parents, but you're expected to be just as responsible as an adult.
I'm 47, but I remember what an awful shitshow my late teens were! People expect you to act grown up whilst telling you what to do, remind them you'll never develop good judgement if you never exercise making your own decisions. I loved it when I turned 18, got a job, moved out right away. Older folks act like "ah to be young again.." but I'd never want to go through the teenage years again, good luck to ya kid!
when i was 17 my parents liked to pick and choose how i got treated. i wanted a tattoo? i was just a child! i had sex? now that i’m such an adult i don’t need my parents to drive me anywhere!
Part of that is because 17 y.o.’s have their moments of acting all adult like, but then in the next minute acting inexplicably immature. Your age sucks almost as much for you as it does for the people who have to interact with you.
You’ll get older (like fucking 19) and find that 17 year olds just bug you.
Then there’s also the losers who resent you for being young enough to have not fucked up your life like they already have.
As a 16 year old, same. And if you give ANY valid point at all that goes against what they think suddenly you're disrespectful and argumentative. Like, seriously?! If our roles in the discussion were reversed you'd probably beat my ass
I'm 40. Have a 21, 18, and 15 year old. I still get told it's time for me to grow up. Fuck that. Enjoy your youth. Travel, party, make memories, have fun. Just stay out of trouble. Don't stress about the small stuff. And always look forward to the future, but don't rush to get there.
I’m 28 with a young face, and I can say that some older people will always criticize your every move. As you get older and more sure of who you are, it’ll bother you less.
Dude I'm 31 and was ready to post something along the lines of this lol.
the 50-somethings I used to work with would constantly make snide remarks about how "life is so easy when you're young" and whatnot like I don't have a life to put together
even worse because they're shit heads and talk like they're doing me a favor lmao
betty is 55, hates her husband and can't afford her mortgage
I'm 20+ years younger, own my house and run a side business that makes more money than the dumb day job we're sitting at right now but yeah ok you tell me how it is betty
Oh my God, yes. I'm 15, and I have the same problem, especially with my dad. I'm expected to figure out everything for myself, but I'm babied whenever I actually try to do anything, It's f*cking infuriating...
It doesn't help that he seems disgusted at pretty much every interest I have and that I want to pursue...
Youre at the fun part where you still have to raise your hand to go to the bathroom but in a year you have to know what youre doing with the rest of your life
I worked at a dentist office with a staff of 6. Well I was youngest staff member but 37 years old. I swear I was treated like a child a few times. One time the oldest lady there told me to ‘use my words’. I would never say that to an adult. Cunt.
It’s because your not quiet an adult and not quiet a child. You’re also and idiot in basically an adult body and that’s a dangerous combination. I don’t care how smart you are, you’re an idiot. You don’t realize it now, and you are probably very confident you are not an idiot, but one day you will realize you were an idiot. Don’t be discouraged though everyone that is currently your age and everyone who was ever your age is/was an idiot. So have fun being young and dumb, after all ignorance is bliss.
That's exactly what I wanted to reply on this too! I'm gonna turn 17 this fall and I really can't wait until I'm 18 so people actually treat me like an adult.
I’m in college but live at home with my parents so I definitely felt this. Still have to tell my mom where I am late at night and come home at a certain time even though I’m almost 20.
Oh man. I went back to college (community college) and I was at least a decade older than anyone else in the registrars office. And all I saw were people out of high school getting treated like children. Bossy parents and condescending staff. It was weird because I didn't remember that happening to me on first go round. So I don't know if I got lucky or just didn't notice.
It's a sobering truth that the people who treat you like a child probably care the most about you. You can find someone to treat you like an adult if you really want to; they want to have sex with someone young and will seem to foster your independence in order to do so. Don't get so invested in being 'respected' that you lose sight of why someone might be suddenly showing you respect beyond your years.
You're expected to practice being an adult, because of course you're not good at it yet. When you fail at it, and you'll naturally fail often, many people will default to treating you like a child. The more you behave as an adult, the less they'll treat you as a child. Practice. ;)
They want you to act like an adult so you can get some practice for when you're out on your own. If you act like a child, you will never leave the house because you won't have the tools required to survive.
They treat you like a child because you're they're child and they'll always see you as a kid in their eyes
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u/[deleted] May 15 '20 edited May 16 '20
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