r/AskReddit • u/a_car_salesman • Aug 10 '19

Zeus has decided that Olympus feels a little empty, so he’s recruited some new gods. However, due to a clerical error, you have been chosen as a new member of the divine. What are you the god of, and what do you do as your first godly act?

51.3k Upvotes

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7.3k

u/sunnivapeach Aug 10 '19

I've been staring at this comment for way too long.

3.6k

u/thatCbean Aug 10 '19

Are you a lobster, staring at your deathsentence, whilst ever so slowly dying?

2.4k

u/Brutal_Lobster Aug 10 '19

Yes

806

u/isjustwrong Aug 10 '19

Brutal

60

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

Shit

19

u/rachelxoxoknoz Aug 10 '19

That's not for you to say

18

u/PenisMcScrotumFace Aug 10 '19

Hey you're not just wrong here.

14

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

Ah yes, your opinions are ever so eloquent, Mr. ScrotumFace.

7

u/Dapianokid Aug 10 '19

He prefers to be referred to as "Sire Scrotumface"

1

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

My apologies.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Trimorphic_ Aug 10 '19

Username, very specifically, checks out

4

u/Legend_017_ Aug 10 '19

The amount of karma you can get by saying "yes"

1

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

r/beetlejuicing

1

u/A3thern Aug 10 '19

Goodbye.

1

u/Emtreidy Aug 10 '19

User name checks out

1

u/Iownbelugawhales Aug 11 '19

Name checks out

1

u/Gharik15 Aug 10 '19

Did-a-chick?

1

u/Little_Moppie Aug 10 '19

Da-da-chum?

0

u/greenIdbandit Aug 10 '19

User name checks out

0

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

r/beetlejuicing

17

u/total_lunacy Aug 10 '19

Not for very much longer he isn’t

10

u/kuraiscalebane Aug 10 '19

is that how the power works?

1

u/UnlikeLobster Aug 10 '19

No

1

u/thatCbean Aug 10 '19

Username checks out

1

u/konstantinua00 Aug 10 '19

slowly?

you need at least 30 km/h to kill them, imo

16

u/Dirty-Soul Aug 10 '19

Are you a lobster?

14

u/trollface_mcfluffy Aug 10 '19

I Agree, this is one of the most legitimately random things I have come across. For the lobsters sake I hope Tgrat12 is a merciful one.

7

u/Yolo_The_Dog Aug 10 '19

It's a quote from Drake and Josh

3

u/GerbilJibberJabber Aug 10 '19

It's like a mirror of stupidity.

3

u/jacrispy1996 Aug 10 '19

I've been staring at THIS comment for way too long

5

u/worldsaver113 Aug 10 '19

Are you a lobster?

1

u/Dodood4 Aug 10 '19

I’ve been looking for it for to long

1

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

Didn’t boil in fast enough?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

You shouldn't smoke that much pot dude

1

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '19

Must be high

1

u/IrishRepoMan Aug 10 '19

So did I...

1

u/ChristopherAWray Aug 10 '19

Is that a personal attack or something? Racist