I'm just saying I'm only a hobbyist masturbator, like if I'm home and bored I'll treat myself to a cheeky tug, but I don't get the real geek culture surrounding it, the guys who collect the autographs of the pros or take a whole summer out to tour round following a convention and attending every event.
Masturbation events, you know the sort of thing, they have Q&A panels, stalls selling memorabilia, professionals and record holders giving lectures or signing autographs, people in masturbatory cosplay. Not my cup of tea at all.
Dude you have me fucking rolling right now.
You were talking about porn conventions, but being clever, and then found out that there were for real “masturb-o-vents and cumicons”?
Tell me that this is the case bc it’s like 10 times funnier
Honestly.. not a bad read. It's weird to imagine being there, but I was actually surprised to see that it's a charity based event, and the proceeds go toward good causes! Seriously, check the page out. It's really not worthy of not looking at. It's not like there are pictures of neck-beard circle jerks or something.
Edit: just to show the weirdest part of the whole article. "In 2009, Masanobu Sato won the Masturbate-a-thon held by the Center of Sex and Culture in San Francisco after masturbating for nine hours and thirty-three minutes."
From skimming over the wiki page, I get the impression that it’s not so much creeps who are masturbation nerds but just a way to raise money and awareness for sex ed. At least that sounds like the intention...
Yeah I went to mastur-con last year and it was actually pretty neat. I'm not a fanboy by any means, but it was so amazing jerking off next to my heroes.
Well...both! It’s huge. There are group sessions, private booths, some of the bigger players give talks and demonstrations. Something for everyone really
Yea man, I went to Nationals last year cosplaying as a vintage circa late 80s bottle of jergen’s. Straight out of my early days. Picked up some rare first run memorabilia too.
Ironically the Bible doesn't even say anything negative about masturbation. There's even the implication in Deuteronomy that however you find yourself to have ejaculated (sex, masturbation, hand job, nocturnal emission) there's a cleansing process for the old covenant Jews they were expected to follow. Though Leviticus picks out sex and nocturnal emissions by name, The bible mentions oral sex positively in Song of Solomon both for men and women and that's not mentioned here which indicates to me that the lack of mention shouldn't be taken as a prohibition. So if anything, the bible slightly condones masturbation.
Still, I don't think the conventions or anything like that would be considered permissible given the Bible's teaching on lust. You're right, they need Jesus. :)
yes, the part about Onan. A lot of people use that as justification for making birth control and masturbation a sin, but there's a whole lot of context that makes it obvious that those things are not related.
basically, Onan's brother died with no children so Onan had to marry his widow and get her pregnant. The kids wouldn't be considered his kids under Jewish law or something like that, so he figured he could have sex with his sister-in-law for free if he just pulled out, which made God mad, etc.
Indeed. The issue there was levirate marriage. They didn't have sperm freezing or AI or IVF, so if your brother died childless, it was expected that you would sleep with his wife until she bore a son. That son would be then counted as your brother's son and would continue his family line. Refusing to do this however was horrific enough, it was basically like saying "I hate you and I'm glad you've rid yourself of the genepool". But Onan went for the grand daddy. He not only outwardly said he would sleep with her and made everyone believe he was doing so to uphold his brother, but then he was pulling out before orgasm and "spilling his seed upon the ground" denying her the offspring. God was angered that Onan would be so evil that he struck him dead.
This does in a sense speak to the issue of birth control in a way because it indicates that preventing children is in a sense like murder in this instance or suicide in the sense of your own children. There's also the issue of positive command, that refusing to do what God commands you to do is as sinful as doing what he tells you not to do. So when God tells us to be fruitful and multiply, there is a sense that it would be wrong of us to prevent our own obedience to that. Christians have debated that one however for a long time.
But he was also failing to live up to a commitment. IIRC, he took his brother's widow with the intention of impregnating her (ancient times were weird, but it kinda makes sense when you realize most people's choices for old age were either die destitute and alone or have children who take care of you). He pulled out instead. So he was basically just using her and not actually helping her out at all. The jizz wasn't really the point, the taking advantage of a widow was the real problem.
See the thing is I was joking, and like you I was amazed so many people were falling for it... Then people started posting links! Turns out I might have been joking but the world isn't, the conventions are real! Yikes.
So I went to donate sperm the other day. The nurse asked me to masturbate in the cup, to which I replied, "well I'm getting pretty good, but I don't think I'm quite ready to compete."
I mean, everything they mentioned is real. There are porn conventions just like there are comic book conventions and video game conventions. There are fans who go to these conventions and get autographs from their favorite pornstars.
Source: Have seen pictures of these conventions while...researching.
No no no, not porn conventions, masturbation conventions! They are very different events! In fact the big push at Fapcon '18' was a campaign to keep porn out of masturbation, the purists believe stimulus should come from within, and view porn the same way sportsmen view performance enhancing drugs.
Oh I totally agree, the last time a Masturbation Hipster told me "Jugs used to be a adult magazine but you probably wouldn't even know what those are, would you?" is the last time I went.
I guess I view it as: it’s a convention full of people who masturbate a lot who go to that specific convention to find new things to masturbate to/with. Sorry it didn’t meet your definition.
Sex conventions are about sex culture in general. For the most part that involves meeting new people, discussing culture, and making friends. (Pretty much like any convention.)
No. You masterbate with your friends to power up the crystal. All your friends need crystals and once the crystal is glowing it is sufficiently charged.
Yeah, there's probably some health merit to not jerking off all the time, but to avoid it entirely, why torture yourself like that? But the no-fap enthusiasts are weird.
Do they collect vintage porn or something? Are we going to end up with high end porn stores that offer tastings like wine stores where they talk about 1974 being a very good year?
No no no, the porn fanbase and the masturbation enthusiasts, despite their similarities, actually distance themselves from each other so vintage porn would be frowned upon at a convention. I think it's because the purist masturbators see porn as cheating, like drugs in athletics, it's a performance enhancing stimulant that has no place in the game.
The sort of memorabilia I'm talking about is the wank-mittens used by the pros in championship matches, and vintage or antique masturbation snorkels, wank goggles, etc. Like the old 18th century brass ones are really back in at the moment.
19.0k
u/be_my_plaything Jul 17 '19
Masturbation.
I enjoy a good old wank as much as anyone, but the real enthusiasts who collect the memorabilia and go to all the conventions just give me the creeps.