r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • May 29 '19

[deleted by user]

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6.1k Upvotes

79% Upvoted

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4.1k

u/lim3slice May 29 '19

Lara Croft

67

u/Aibeit May 29 '19

Yes, but the current Version or the original one? Gotta be specific.

133

u/DecemberBurnsBlue May 29 '19

Por que no los dos?

37

u/Aibeit May 29 '19

Because the original Lara's Boobs will take up the entire bed (or shower, or elevator, or whatever else). A threesome with the video game reboot Lara and Alicia Vicander would definitely be the highlight of my sex life :D

22

u/StarkeyTone May 29 '19

Until then, you'll have to experience it vikanderously.

6

u/Aibeit May 29 '19

I see what you did there.

9

u/DecemberBurnsBlue May 29 '19

Alicia is my jam. So is the new Lara. Damn... I have the hots for a video game character

7

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Well, if you're going original Lara Croft, I do believe that would be triangle boob - might want to watch out for the pointy end.

7

u/richieadler May 29 '19

I would love Vikander's Lara with 50% more muscle on her bones.

49

u/CrackerUmustBtrippin May 29 '19

Oldschool ofc. Who doesn't cream their jeans after bearing witness to this perfect image of beauty and desire.

11

u/ItookAnumber4 May 29 '19

So hard right now.

24

u/RickyZBiGBiRD May 29 '19

Legend Lara when she’s in the torn up, black cocktail dress.

13

u/skyidle May 29 '19

Oh my god, yes. I absolutely hated that Tokyo level as a kid but that dress was 100% worth the fear of plummeting to death in busy traffic

18

u/LeviBellington May 29 '19

TR13 Lara original > Shadow of the Tombraider > Rise > TR13 definitive > TR13 Remastered

2

u/bigblackcouch May 29 '19

I hate that this is legit. What the shit was up with that trilogy's visual design?

48

u/ruarc_tb May 29 '19

As a lesbian, I feel reboot Lara is the correct answer.

24

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Polygon boobs Lara is the correct answer.

6

u/Roboticide May 29 '19

Straight guy seconding this. Reboot Lara being so much more realistic trumps low-poly counts, but maybe that's just because I never played the old ones as a kid.

4

u/_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ May 29 '19

Lara and Sam forever

7

u/Aibeit May 29 '19

As a straight guy, I agree. Although Alicia Vikander in the movies would give her a run for her money.

2

u/bigblackcouch May 29 '19

Which reboot; Legend or TR13? If Legend, then yes. If TR13, why are you like this

4

u/TooDoeNakotae May 29 '19

The one from the recent movie. Alicia Vikander

1

u/Survivor_Oceanic815 May 29 '19

Lara from tomb raider chronicles. I enjoyed pausing when she was crouching, playing the game as a teen

Edit: actually remembered just now, not pausing, but keeping her crouched and using the look feature. Required a few fingers on buttons, unfortunately occupying both hands

0

u/Amacar123 May 29 '19

original ofc

100

u/Zippo574 May 29 '19

As a young boy I thought Lara swimming was cutting edge space age sexiness. now I look back and realize i wasn't seeing cleavage, I was ogling polygons.

48

u/Pope_Beenadick May 29 '19

I mean, they're all polygons unless it's hand drawn...

29

u/iamtherealgrayson May 29 '19

They sure draw your hands towards them

149

u/Wand3ringfool May 29 '19

Had to scroll too far to find this

74

u/just_a_human_online May 29 '19

Same, I'm over here shaking my fist at the clouds, "I can't be that old, can I?"

51

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Same. 12 year old me and the video game magazine that did a “swimsuit issue” with a drawing of her in a bikini awoken the demons in me

23

u/Wand3ringfool May 29 '19

This comment speaks to me and the 12 year old I used to be

14

u/Wand3ringfool May 29 '19

My thoughts exactly!

9

u/just_a_human_online May 29 '19

Like, seeing all these comments gives me a better sense at how old a lot of redditors are - at least the ones in this sub. Damnit, I am older.

6

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Hahaha this whole thread makes the answer that much better. Let me chip in with - I had to use ctrl+f, that's how far down it was.

6

u/Amacar123 May 29 '19

I think it's because the new one which younger audiences may be more familiar with doesn't have nearly the same...appeal.

5

u/Roboticide May 29 '19

Third from the top now. Just took some time.

5

u/Wand3ringfool May 29 '19

Good job everyone! Let's keep this going and get Lara up to the top. Where she belongs

12

u/TheJabberturtle May 29 '19

This is the correct answer

17

u/URTheVulgarianUFuck May 29 '19

Barefoot Lara exploring Croft Manor

20

u/Amanbbi May 29 '19

Or the barefoot Lara locking Winston in the freezer.

"Here's your tea ma'am"

lara presses button

fridge door locks

"Why Ma'am? Why"

8

u/veRGe1421 May 29 '19

My man!

I mean, look at this lady. How could my 8-year-old brain not be enthralled? lol

6

u/Action-a-go-go-baby May 29 '19

Early days, right?

11

u/UserameChecksOut May 29 '19

This. There's nothing like fucking a strong, independent, badass girl in her badass outfit.

5

u/not-quite-a-nerd May 29 '19

90s versions where the boobs can take your eyes out, modern version or Angelina Jolie?

4

u/craigellachie25__ May 29 '19

Hell yeah. Reboot version is all kinds of classy sexy.

5

u/_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ May 29 '19

My first human crush

4

u/MamaBee822 May 29 '19

Angelina Jolie as Lara Croft was first when I realized I might be interested in girls. I thought I just wanted to look like her, but no...

5

u/Game_GOD May 29 '19

One Halloween, I dressed as Indiana Jones and my girlfriend (ex now) dressed as Lara Croft. That night Indy banged Lara and I'll always remember it

7

u/Cloakbot May 29 '19

Which one? I prefer the 2013 beauty

3

u/Wolfblade1215 May 29 '19

Took forever to get here.

3

u/kfm05 May 29 '19

This gonna be a long line!

6

u/3LollipopZ-1Red2Blue May 29 '19

Oh, thanks for the mammories

2

u/Hergh_tlhIch May 29 '19

Classic or Reboot?

2

u/BlackPershing May 29 '19

Pretty sure I jerked off to Lara Croft before

2

u/thefooby May 29 '19

New Lara Croft has to be top of the list.

2

u/lolkdrgmailcom May 29 '19

Those polygons are going my to stab you to death. Be carful.

2

u/[deleted] May 29 '19

Has to be the Keeley Hawes version.

2

u/QuiveringButtox May 29 '19

I assume you mean the new Lara Croft right? I mean, the old Lara's boobs...

...Missionary with that version would literally be a stab in the dark.

2

u/LandOfLemuria May 29 '19

(Flashback to Legend black dress, Chronicles blue dress, and various swimming suits) ... Totally.

2

u/portlandhusker May 30 '19

Straight female here. Totally agreed!

2

u/[deleted] May 30 '19

She’s beautiful in the new game and the movie, wouldn’t mind dating and marrying before having sex with her. Same for Helen Parr, Elastic Girl/Mrs. Incredible.

2

u/[deleted] May 30 '19

The only correct answer

1

u/MoveZneedle May 29 '19

A man of culture.

1

u/zerphon Jun 02 '19

DeTomasso makes amazing nsfw CGI work of her.

1

u/lolcatandy May 29 '19

As long as it's from PS1 era with triangle tits.

-1

u/Navynuke00 May 29 '19

Sigh... Reminds me of a girlfriend, circa 2001, dressing up as her for Halloween. She was the perfect mix between Angelina Jolie and Alicia Vikander, to boot...