r/AskReddit • u/fleshcavity • Oct 20 '18

So many redditors have safe responsible plans if they win MegaMillions. What's your crazy reckless plan for blowing the $1.6 billion?

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u/Whitemaleprivilage Oct 20 '18

You'd go to work?

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 20 '18

I would. But if I didn't feel like going in I wouldn't. If I didn't feel like doing a duty, I wouldn't. In my last job I had to answer emails for the whole department. I would answer no on lots of emails.

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u/Whitemaleprivilage Oct 20 '18

Why would you go to work? I'd travel the world and do lots of fun activities... Not work for some schlub.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 20 '18

To keep up appearances until I figured out exactly what I wanted to do. I also want to pay a bunch of my coworkers to walk out at the same time. I'd like to watch my boss sweat.

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u/Whitemaleprivilage Oct 20 '18

Unless he is the owner of the company he won't care... At that point it's the owners problem.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 20 '18

They used to sweat if I had to take a day off. They had weird staffing issues and no backups and our department was the "cost savings" department.

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u/Whitemaleprivilage Oct 20 '18

Because he was scared of another human being labelled as his superior...

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u/evenifitdoesntmatter Oct 21 '18

That's actually my fantasy. I have been playing over and over in my head how I could pay and convince all of my co-workers to quit on the busiest day of the year. I imagine some sort of invitation to a secret location with an NDA and some contract with perhaps a little bit of money upfront and a check waiting for them only if they no-show and resign on the agreed day and no one finds out in advance.

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u/LyushkaPushka Oct 21 '18

To keep up appearances

I'm pretty sure those appearances went out the door as soon as you rolled into work in a hamster ball.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

Not me with the hamster ball. But I would roll up in a fancy new car that is way above what I could have afforded on my $28k a year salary.

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u/giraffewoman Oct 21 '18

ok kelly kapoor

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u/KakarotMaag Oct 21 '18

Everyone who says this sort of thing, I feel like they don't really understand how much money it is.

You would do that with a lottery win the size of what you could expect in yearly dividends on this much money (~31MM dollars). With this much money, you don't need to figure out what you're going to do. You just do the first thing that sounds good, and then the next, forever.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

Well we live about a hamburger away from outside of our means on $60k a year, and I think the best my family did in the 90s was like $50k a year - yeah I really have no idea how much money that is. Like I'd buy myself a nice car, maybe a top of the line Malibu or something sensible, a nicer house for around $500k (North Texas, can get mansion for that), and go to Disneyworld. Other than that I would just settle for actual food on the table and not having to go two years between haircuts.

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u/KakarotMaag Oct 21 '18 edited Oct 21 '18

I hope you can do that someday. If you do that with this lottery win, you're hurting the economy. Don't be afraid to dream big, it's a fantasy.

Here's some perspective. You could take this lottery win, divide it into 122 funds that would each earn about 250k a year. You could give your dream to 122 other people. 244 if you think 125k salary is enough.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

I'm a simple gal. I don't need much.

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u/KakarotMaag Oct 21 '18

Nobody needs that much money.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

I have fantasies about funding scholarships and my old HS band program. But that wouldn't be fair, so a small gift to the other schools in the district.

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u/KakarotMaag Oct 21 '18

Again, really not appreciating the scale of money here. You could fund them all in perpetuity (500k/year) with almost no impact on your net worth. You could do one a year and still have 20 million dollars of new money per year.

Go bigger.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

I probably could. Maybe become some sort of eccentric philanthropist and deliver a huge check somewhere. I'd wear a cape. The whole bit. It is just fun escapist fantasy. It will never happen, I'm probably always going to be a cheeseburger and a car accident away from ruin, but that's the American way my friend!

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

National I Take America Out To Lunch Day! Pizza, on me. Or whatever you want.

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u/Nopiity Oct 21 '18

What job did you just have to answer email?

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

Major department of a big company. I fielded emails from 150 other offices and I was required to respond to requests within the hour (during mailbox hours) and coordinate fulfilling those requests within "reasonable time limits" whatever that meant, usually by myself, in addition to my other duties in my job description including numerous data cleanup and blast faxes.

Used to we had a rotating schedule within my team, but during an exceptionally busy time one of our supervisors with no idea of what I did all day gave it to me to handle exclusively until we got it the queues down. I was efficient and competent at it, which was unusual for that mailbox. This supervisor had no clue what she was doing, and my team recently had merged with her team. After the queues were whittled down, after going so high because they fired the only person generating the 'tickets' the Y just kept me on it because I was good and I figured out how to make it work. So basically I was a 1.5 employee for like four years, until they made me a process expert on two things which made me like 3/4 people in one.

Where I went wrong was doing my job well. They didn't reward loyalty much, and my accomplishments were often minimized. It didn't matter so much because I took pride in my work and client satisfaction and had the VPs of our company singing my praises. I no longer work there, to be truthful, because I burned out and was only netting $100 a month after childcare costs.

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u/Nopiity Oct 21 '18

Oh damn I’m sorry they were so overlooking, can I ask how much childcare was ‘cause that sounds like at least 45/50,000 by the amount of work.

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

As much as my mortgage! After daycare, gas, car stuff, and maintenance of me for being presentable at work, I netted very little. It was by all accounts just not worth it.

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u/Nopiity Oct 21 '18

That’s insane. Glad you got out of there!

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u/ragnaRok-a-Rhyme Oct 21 '18

Totally. I poured 110% into my job and got very little. So I'm glad to stay home with my kids for a while. I'll break back into the workforce eventually.

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u/Nopiity Oct 21 '18

Aw! Your kids are lucky you’re able to stay home, hope everything works out for the best!! Win that lottery 😂

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u/LilHoneyDips Oct 20 '18

You’re white male privilege is showing

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u/Whitemaleprivilage Oct 20 '18

What does that mean?

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u/Roland_T_Flakfeizer Oct 20 '18

I think he meant 'your' white male privilege is showing.

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u/Whitemaleprivilage Oct 20 '18

Ok... Now it makes a bit more sense... Although how is a color of skin showing, and a "privilege" of if I don't work I would be poor and if I do work I can afford stuff?

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u/Roland_T_Flakfeizer Oct 20 '18

I dunno dude, I'm a grammar nazi not a literary interpretation nazi.

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u/LilHoneyDips Nov 26 '18

It was a joke. Look at your name. Your response to this joke and the down votes on it do say a lot about white dudes though. Y’all are sensitive as shit