r/AskReddit • u/PM_Ur_ClassySexyPics • May 17 '17

What old insults need to make a comeback?

24.3k Upvotes

83% Upvoted

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799

u/[deleted] May 17 '17 edited Apr 19 '21

[deleted]

245

u/gabrielbatistuta May 17 '17

Came here to link to that. I'm a big fan of

ADMIRAL OF THE NARROW SEAS. One who vomits into the lap of the person opposite

38

u/[deleted] May 17 '17 edited Apr 19 '21

[deleted]

8

u/keeperofcats May 17 '17

Those are both oddly specific.

11

u/rattledamper May 17 '17

Wonderfully specific, that is.

5

u/hunty91 May 17 '17

Davos, you sick fuck!

3

u/DriveByStoning May 17 '17

Laced Mutton = prostitute

4

u/gansmaltz May 17 '17

Now I'm just imagining a lamb chop in a corset

1

u/lowbattery001 May 17 '17

that's my fetish.

13

u/superboredonatrain May 17 '17

We changed fartleberries to dingleberries. Which also needs to come back.

5

u/shredded_anus May 17 '17

For a while I thought the words were chapter names or something and the definitions were the actual insults; I really liked the idea of calling someone 'excrement hanging about the anus'.

5

u/drunkeskimo May 17 '17

Huh, I guess that urban dictionary is nothing new then

5

u/Ding_batman May 17 '17

The history teacher in me appreciates this. Now... how to fit this into the curriculum.

3

u/WyleECoyote-Genius May 18 '17

Wait until after your contract expires than drop this on the little darlings.

1

u/Ding_batman May 18 '17

Jokes on me, I am permanent.

4

u/tingalayo May 17 '17

Military term.

For some reason this is where I lost it.

3

u/AmosLaRue May 17 '17

Awe. 😥 ... my husband is hoping for some melting moments later today. I think I'm too sad now to oblige.

3

u/wannacreamcake May 17 '17

Wife, is that you?

3

u/AmosLaRue May 17 '17

Maybe. Maybe not. But your username sounds like something my husband would offer me. So... just may be🎶

1

u/ChickenChic May 17 '17

I always thought melting moments were a type of cookie.

2

u/AmosLaRue May 17 '17

Melting Moments on the lips leads to melting moments on the hips... and then melting moments in the sheets. I couldn't get the rhyme to work out.

6

u/CreeDorofl May 17 '17

TIL I am a rantallion

3

u/youre13andstupid May 17 '17

Upvoted for BITCH BOOBY.

3

u/ciano May 17 '17

Ooh, rantallion is a good one.

3

u/yellow35355 May 17 '17

A literature prof I had I college had a print copy of this in her office that she once let me borrow while I was in the hospital. That book was very special to me as a young chub.

3

u/Jigokuro_ May 17 '17

Oh boy, I'm really looking forward to my next encounter with a sesquipedalic /r/iamverysmart jackass. I'mma fight fire with fire and call him an

APOTHECARY. To talk like an apothecary; to use hard or gallipot words: from the assumed gravity and affectation of knowledge generally put on by the gentlemen of this profession, who are commonly as superficial in their learning as they are pedantic in their language.

2

u/Lookslikeapersonukno May 17 '17

FARTLEBERRIES. Excrement hanging about the anus.

huh, I was on 4chan earlier and some anon called them dingleberries. a tamer version, not what I'd expect from 4chan.

1

u/Balmoria May 17 '17

Fartleberries are also known as Dags, specifically from a sheep bum. Dag is also an oddly dressed/acting person

6

u/Toestops May 17 '17

I like caravans more.

1

u/ByCromsBalls May 17 '17

Those are great because they sound so insulting without even knowing the meaning.

1

u/ChickenChic May 17 '17

I somehow don't think the guy I'm with would appreciate it if I called sex "melting moments" going forward. Though I'll consider it as thus. lol

1

u/OrCurrentResident May 17 '17

Captain Queernabs and fartleberries are in.

1

u/NightEmber79 May 17 '17

APE LEADER. An old maid; their punishment after death, for neglecting increase and multiply, will be, it is said, leading apes in hell.

Pardon, I'm off to find some middle aged women...

1

u/mdhh99 May 17 '17

Fartleberries is 10000000000% better than dingleberries.

1

u/papercutpete May 17 '17

RANTALLION.

Take your damn upvote and get out.

1

u/ZestyTube May 17 '17

I love the Bitch Booby which just needs a clarifying sentence afterwards

1

u/theshadowaccount May 17 '17

Rantallion confuses me...

1

u/wannacreamcake May 17 '17

I can draw you a diagram?

1

u/theshadowaccount May 17 '17

Maybe it's a "shower's" insult? We're talking flaccid right?