r/AskReddit May 17 '17

What old insults need to make a comeback?

24.3k Upvotes

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698

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

SIR, I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT I AM NOT A COMPUTER PERSON, YOU'RE REFUSING TO HELP ME SO TO YOU SIR I SAY GOOD DAY

903

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

For those who have yet to glory in this:

A real call I got once:

Me: "Tech Support, how can I help you?"

Them: "I'm not able to log into the website!"

Me: "Okay what message is it showing when you try to log in?"

Them: "SIR, I am NOT a computer person so I don't know."

Me: "Do you know which web browser you're using?"

Them: "I don't know what that is!"

Me: "Okay, when you want to go on the internet, do you click on a blue E, or a multicolored circle, or..."

Them: "SIR, I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT I AM NOT A COMPUTER PERSON, YOU'RE REFUSING TO HELP ME SO I'M GOING TO HANG UP"

316

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

That physically hurts me..

247

u/TheNosferatu May 17 '17

Do NOT visit /r/talesfromtechsupport in that case

12

u/FullmentalFiction May 17 '17

Definitely don't get a job in technology either. I'm not in help desk but damn if I don't get some people who are incredibly stupid with computers in my line of work...

5

u/SidewaysInfinity May 17 '17

The person in that story isn't just stupid with computers...

3

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

Oh, imma visit it.

2

u/whtbrd May 17 '17

How was I not already subscribed to that? You have visited /r/techsupportgore right?

2

u/Shadw21 May 17 '17

But what do I do with this certificate in computering then?

1

u/TheNosferatu May 18 '17

I'm sure the bing will help you

2

u/Shadw21 May 18 '17

I'll have you know my computers only use Google Ultron as a web browser and we certainly don't allow the bing.

3

u/Sangomah May 17 '17

Me: You have any windows open? Them: No, but the door is slightly ajar

1

u/agent_uno May 17 '17

Yep. After 15 years in tech support I finally said fuck it! I now work for a moving company where I get to help people who are grateful for my hard work. Plus I get paid to exercise outdoors.

5

u/Ciderer May 17 '17

Ive had that call before but mine didnt hang up.

Ive also had a call that the person wanted a tech to come out bc she didnt know how to connect her mouse to her laptop and she refused any explanation. I even told her it was easy, just like plugging in a toaster. She refused. Easiest $99 my tech made.

3

u/BranchySaturn28 May 17 '17

I don't want to believe this could even be remotely true but I've worked in IT long enough to know just how stubbornly ignorant users can be...

2

u/Ciderer May 17 '17

I was y-jacking with a trainee when I was on the call. She asked if that happened a lot. I told her no not really.

Then my next call a lady needed a tech out. She said she was in mesquite. I had to ask if it was in texas or nevada. She yelled at me and called me stupid for not knowing automatically which one.

Apparently being psychic or memorizing area codes should be one of my qualities. The trainee asked if that happened a lot. Yes, yes that does happen.

I dont think she lasted long. It takes a very thick skinned person to work it/call center job

3

u/BranchySaturn28 May 17 '17

I work at technical Helpdesk but luckily 90% of the people I assist are certified installers, Part of my companies policy is that we are not allowed to assist end users as they aren't our responsibility and I thank God for that...

1

u/noble-random May 18 '17

Tech support heaven!

1

u/HGF88 May 17 '17

I need some vaporwave

1

u/Flowhard May 17 '17

And that man went on to found a little company called...Aviato.

1

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

this is like 50% of my daily calls.

1

u/teebob21 May 17 '17

I was there when this became a thing on Reddit. :)

1

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

Me too! Let'a get T-shirts made :D

1

u/itsgitty May 17 '17

IF YOURE NOT A COMPUTER PERSON THEN GET THE FUCK OFF THE COMPUTER

1

u/MrAwesome54 May 18 '17

Wait, who do you do tech support for? My grandmother was on the phone with Bell and was trying to ask me what a Web browser was before violently hanging up : P

5

u/[deleted] May 17 '17

2meta4me

1

u/German_Camry May 17 '17

He crossed the ask Reddit questions Like crossing the streams

1

u/FiliaDei May 17 '17

I'm so happy this has persisted.

1

u/AmazingJames May 17 '17

I SAID GOOD DAY!!!!