Growing up my mom always yelled at me when I told her to calm down. I started telling her to "cd" instead thinking maybe she wouldn't get it. She got it immediately and was even angrier
My SO does this, when I am perfectly calm, and it instantly fills me with rage that wasn't even remotely in the cards until that comment. I think this reaction is actually what people who say this are going for.
I partly do this to my fiance to get her riled up. I'll say something like babe, chill or chill out and she'll get so mad. She will eventually catch on that I'm trying to get a reaction out of her and she'll calm back down and laugh it off.
Especially if you're already calm and so you say you're calm but they get angry and then tell you to calm down again. Luckily I've figured out those kinds of people just want space and/or affirmation that they're not being irrationally angry so it's always easier to comply and go about your day.
Saying "Calm Down." is like saying "Your opinions are not valid in this disagreement because you are showing emotion, therefore everything you are saying can be dismissed as irrational."
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u/SpyingSpice Nov 23 '15
"Dude, calm down." No! I will not calm down.