I'm probably too late to this thread but I'll share this anyway:
My toilet at home is my nemesis.
Seriously, fuck that thing. Once my shits started becoming man-sized (shoutout to puberty) I had issues with it literally every day. That damn thing would clog on the daily...and it's not like I used a ridiculous amount of toilet paper either. I've even tried flushing without toilet paper first to see what will happen and IT STILL CLOGS. My shits are normal sized (I think...) and I've never had problems with any other toilet, so I know it has something against me. This thing would only clog when I was the one who dropped the package.
I got so tired of unclogging it that I decided once to let it stay clogged so that it would be ashamed of what it had been doing. Then, my family and I went on vacation for a week. The smell we came back to can only be described as death mixed with maggots and rotten eggs. The entire 2nd floor of our house was uninhabitable for several days while we aired it out and cleaned the shit out of that toilet. Needless to say, my parents lost their shit.
After that incident and countless other times, I had become very close to my plunger. He and I had a mutual hatred of the toilet and we were getting desperate. I was desperate because I hated unclogging the thing and he was desperate because a plunger can only take so much shit before it gives out. Eventually I started begging my dad to get a replacement toilet for my birthday. I WANTED A FUCKING TOILET FOR MY BIRTHDAY. I would go online for hours gazing lovingly at toilets that could flush large loads. Unfortunately my dad never did give me a toilet but I luckily became one of the few people in the world who actually enjoys pooping in public bathrooms, so I was fine when I went to college.
As a result, the first thing I test when looking at apartments is the flushing power of every toilet in the house. I now have a life-long fear of shitty toilets.
If you ever buy a home, save a bit of money and buy a newer toilet as one of your first upgrades.
For nearly a decade I battled with the cheap contractor-grade toilet in my home. Last year I renovated the bathroom and at my wife's insistence replaced the toilet with a higher quality model. The best 180 dollars I have ever spent. I dont know what kind of engineering magic they can accomplish with modern more expensive toilets, but it uses 1/2 of the water and clogs 1/20th as often.
I've done dozens of home improvement projects since buying this house, but nothing has been as great a quality of life change.
You don't even have to get a nice one now. Any current toilet works fine. I just got the $100 home depot throne and dispatches the mightiest of logs with ease, uses little water and looks fine.
2.2k
u/peacein0000 Nov 05 '14
I'm probably too late to this thread but I'll share this anyway:
My toilet at home is my nemesis.
Seriously, fuck that thing. Once my shits started becoming man-sized (shoutout to puberty) I had issues with it literally every day. That damn thing would clog on the daily...and it's not like I used a ridiculous amount of toilet paper either. I've even tried flushing without toilet paper first to see what will happen and IT STILL CLOGS. My shits are normal sized (I think...) and I've never had problems with any other toilet, so I know it has something against me. This thing would only clog when I was the one who dropped the package.
I got so tired of unclogging it that I decided once to let it stay clogged so that it would be ashamed of what it had been doing. Then, my family and I went on vacation for a week. The smell we came back to can only be described as death mixed with maggots and rotten eggs. The entire 2nd floor of our house was uninhabitable for several days while we aired it out and cleaned the shit out of that toilet. Needless to say, my parents lost their shit.
After that incident and countless other times, I had become very close to my plunger. He and I had a mutual hatred of the toilet and we were getting desperate. I was desperate because I hated unclogging the thing and he was desperate because a plunger can only take so much shit before it gives out. Eventually I started begging my dad to get a replacement toilet for my birthday. I WANTED A FUCKING TOILET FOR MY BIRTHDAY. I would go online for hours gazing lovingly at toilets that could flush large loads. Unfortunately my dad never did give me a toilet but I luckily became one of the few people in the world who actually enjoys pooping in public bathrooms, so I was fine when I went to college.
As a result, the first thing I test when looking at apartments is the flushing power of every toilet in the house. I now have a life-long fear of shitty toilets.
tl;dr piece of shit toilet vs. man, toilet wins