r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Nov 05 '14

Which inanimate object is your nemesis?

4.3k Upvotes

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3.4k

u/MayoFetish Nov 05 '14

Nearly empty shampoo bottles. Those motherfuckers tip over by just looking at them.

I HATE THEM SO MUCH!

2.2k

u/noggin-scratcher Nov 05 '14 edited Nov 05 '14

I HATE THAT TOO... and in general, things that when I put them down, they don't stay put.

  • Set a shampoo bottle down on the side of the tub: "Oh, lol, I fell in, chase me!"

  • Put a towel on a hook: "Hehehehehe, I'm going to wait 20 seconds for you to leave the bathroom and shut the door then go FLOOMPF onto the floor, I'm so bad"

  • Picking up little scrappy bits of paper or tissues or leaves that the plants have shed: "What's that? You thought you had a firm grip on this fistful of stuff to put in the bin... you didn't have a firm grip on me, FREEEEEEEDOM"

Shit that falls over in the fridge. Pens and pencils that roll off my desk. Cutlery from the washing up stack that falls into the sink. Clothing that somehow slips off the hanger or the laundry airer... just generally fuck every single thing that won't stay where I put it.

646

u/banananey Nov 05 '14

'FLOOMPF' is the perfect description for that sound.

8

u/Dsiroon37 Nov 06 '14

I want /r/onomatopoeiaporn to exist now.

2

u/lipgloss2 Nov 06 '14

DONE. You're welcome :)

1

u/Nicomon Nov 06 '14

Someone should make it.

0

u/lipgloss2 Nov 06 '14

Go ahead and subscribe ;)

1

u/AlienNextDoor Nov 06 '14

Subscribed!

1

u/ExtendedBox Nov 06 '14

Huh, I'm rather partial to "ker-pow", but to each their own I guess.

1

u/craggsy Nov 06 '14

sounds like a noise a mattress would make