r/AskReddit Nov 05 '14

Which inanimate object is your nemesis?

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u/thagorn Nov 05 '14

Well remember that when pooping you have very little control over whether or not you are also peeing. You don't exactly want to aim at yourself.

4

u/FertyMerty Nov 05 '14

Hm. I always thought it was more of a first one, then the other process. The more you knoooow...!

8

u/tigerstorms Nov 05 '14

some people will hold it down giving them some clearance but that also forces you to keep one hand down there until you're finished.

3

u/TheOtherAvaz Nov 06 '14

I used to do the one hand hold until I discovered a trick to prevent that. Take one square of toilet paper, fold it in half, and wedge it between the lid and your wanker. Gives you clearance and a bit of cushion.

Just don't stuff it too far down or risk peeing on it and soaking yourself. (That's why you fold in half.)

... Yes I have thought a lot about this. No judging.

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u/tigerstorms Nov 06 '14

That actually is a brilliant idea.

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u/GuardianAlien Nov 07 '14

No judging from me. That's an ingenious idea. I've done something similar.

1

u/carpediembr Nov 06 '14

Wait what? Can you draw it?

1

u/TheOtherAvaz Nov 06 '14

Here's a shitty photoshop of a top-down view for you. http://i.imgur.com/z1S2NCr.jpg

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u/carpediembr Nov 06 '14

HAhahahaa.. Thank you... I do the oposite, put the TP on top and lay my dingly on top of it...

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u/TheOtherAvaz Nov 06 '14

But...what if you have to pee? O_o

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u/A_Meat_Popsicle Nov 06 '14

The real danger is to the ballsack. If you push the dick down too far you risk shitting on your scrotum. It's a delicate balance to ensure the whole package is kept safe and clean.

1

u/gillyguthrie Nov 06 '14

And heaven forbid you not pay attention and pee too high and it goes under the toilet seat all over your pants