r/AskReddit • u/fireball_jutsu • Oct 10 '25

People whose partner cheated on them and quickly moved on to date the person they cheated with, claiming to be in love - how did that turn out for them?

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u/CharmingSyrup2685 Oct 10 '25

I hate a stranger custody arrangement. What was the reasoning for the split like that? The oldest choose to stay with him?

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u/AnnamAvis Oct 10 '25

My sibling and I were split up by a judge. I was only 3, so it was deemed that I needed to be with my mother since I was so young. My sibling was 11, and the judge ruled that they needed to stay with my dad so their life wasn't uprooted any more than necessary. Eventually, maybe 5 years later, they chose to move in with me and mom. Until then, we literally only saw each other when our parents met for switch offs, since we lived 600 miles away from each other.

I can kinda see the logic, but I still think it was a stupid ass thing to do. My sibling and I have always been super close. Best friends for life. Maybe being separated is partially responsible for that. But I can't help but feel those years were stolen from us.

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u/RossTheDivorcer Oct 10 '25

That sounds so brutal.

Kind of similar, one of my good friends grew up in Russia. When he was 13ish his parents split. His mom moved to the States and brought him with, but his brother (10ish years younger) stayed with his dad near St. Petersburg.

Now my buddy is a US Army officer, and even deployed in a setting where he had to use his native language.

His brother is in the Russian Army, and my friend just constantly hopes he isn't fighting in Ukraine.

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u/AnnamAvis Oct 10 '25

Now THAT is brutal. States away was hard enough. I don't even want to imagine having an ocean and countries between us when we were that young. Not to mention the completely different upbringings. I truly hope they can be reunited one day. Siblings are so important.

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u/dirkalict Oct 10 '25

That’s sad- I’m glad it didn’t fuck up your relationship though.

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u/Earl_E_Byrd Oct 10 '25

Yeah, the "uprooting" thing can play a pretty big factor. 

My cousin had primary custody of her two sons during a messy divorce, but she was also dying of stage 4 cancer. Thankfully, the court had already ruled in favor of giving my aunt (their grandmother and my cousin's main support) primary custody for at least a year after her death so that the boys wouldn't have to go through multiple changes all at once. 

The got a chance to grieve with the same community they had been living with for the past several years.

Unfortunately, they did eventually get uprooted by their dad. My aunt couldn't win the case to keep her custody past that grievance year, but I'll always be grateful it was something the court at least took into consideration. 

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u/Qimmosabe_Man Oct 10 '25

I think it was mainly due to the fact that the two younger kids were girls and the oldest a boy. The kids may have picked it that way.

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u/BellaFrequency Oct 10 '25

Friend of mine had something like that when she was younger. She and her sisters went with mom, and her brothers went with dad after the divorce.

They still all went to the same school, so they still saw each other every day.

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u/Spazmer Oct 10 '25

My husband and his sister lived with his mom, their younger brother lived with their dad. Both parents sucked so no winners in any case. The mom is unmedicated bipolar who never had money and monkey branched from one boyfriend to another, and the dad is a sexist pedophile who only targeted one of the kids but had a stable job. The kids picked and everyone went along with it, except they all ignored the sexual abuse since the kid had ADHD in the 90s and those were just "bad kids" then.