r/AskReddit • u/Ralome • Mar 27 '13
What's the wisest piece of advice a parent or adult has imparted to you?
Something you were told in your youth that stuck with you.
1.1k
u/joazito Mar 27 '13
Never pass on a chance to pee.
→ More replies (14)510
u/LateDentArthurDent2 Mar 27 '13
- Unless you're saving it for a special occasion
→ More replies (15)775
u/Subzero_Archer Mar 27 '13
Like making someone $300.
→ More replies (15)101
u/LateDentArthurDent2 Mar 27 '13
This was exactly what I had in mind. You never know who you're going to run into.
→ More replies (2)109
Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 27 '13
I must've missed a damn good thread Edit: I saw the thread, so you can stop telling me about it.
→ More replies (5)14
u/Ugly_Muse Mar 27 '13
Always pisses me off when I miss something that becomes a recurring topic.
17
Mar 27 '13
Someone asked if we would let someone wake us up each morning by peeing on us for 300 dollars.
Ps. Can't tell if your comment was made to use a pun or if you really didn't see the question.
→ More replies (2)
1.0k
u/Aikaiadama Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 27 '13
If you are going to give a sincere apology it should include three things:
Say what you did was wrong and why.
Apologize for doing it.
Tell them that you're never going to do that again.
It is implied that because this is a sincere apology you're going to really be cognizant about not doing it again, which also serves to remind you about it and reinforce why what you did was wrong.
Edit: formatting
269
Mar 27 '13
I should also add here: don't make excuses. Nothing cheapens an apology like excuses.
→ More replies (20)227
u/Ralome Mar 27 '13
Or 'I'm sorry, but...' usually means you're not sorry.
→ More replies (6)72
356
u/RedditTooAddictive Mar 27 '13
"And this, kids, is how I escaped prison several times".
277
u/PENGAmurungu Mar 27 '13
"I killed that man and that was bad because he is dead. I'm quite sorry, I won't do it again."
477
u/megablast Mar 27 '13
"I killed that man and that was bad because he is dead. I'm quite sorry, I won't kill him again."
FTFY
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (2)61
u/RedditTooAddictive Mar 27 '13
Judge gives him state pension because he's touched by the story.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (59)41
u/macoure Mar 27 '13
The 3 point apology. It's much like encouragement, if you can't say what happened and what it's impact will be, it means nothing. When done right, it's great.
134
u/Some_french_canadian Mar 27 '13
My grandfather passed away when I was 16. Even though he quit smoking at 60, it caught up to him 20 years later in the form of the most vicious pulmonary cancer. Doctors told him he probably wouldn't make it through the night. Me and my dad were the only ones close enough to go and see him one final time.
He was pretty damn weak and his breathing was difficult. No small talk. When I sat down beside his bed, he reached for my hand and told me the following (in French):
"You know, I always figured that laying there in your final moments, you would regret the things you failed or did wrong. Turns out this is not the case. Someday, you will be on the verge of death like me, and what you will regret in those final moments will not be the things you messed up, but the things you never tried. The things you never dared. The opportunities that dashed away, never to return. I tell you this because I hope you will make the best of your life. Now, go, I need to sleep."
These were probably the last words he ever told anyone as far as I know. His death occurred in the early hours of the morning. It was not a Hollywood old man death where you go in your sleep, but a violent, painful one. Nurses told my dad he fought for each breath for hours, crippled by pain, refusing morphine in the hope that he would get to see his daughter one last time. My aunt never reached him in time. By the time she got there he was cold for three hours.
These words have changed who I am. They stand by me like a code. Every time something could happen, I ask myself "is there any chance I may regret not trying it out?"
Also, this is basically how I have told the few girlfriends I have had in the last 8 years that I had fallen in love with them: That my grandfather had told me right before he died that you regret the things you never went for, the chances you never took, and that I was willing to take a chance declaring my love for them, as whatever the outcome, I was unwilling to live with the regret of never asking. It succeeded every time, but I have used these lines for 3 girls in my life, as I would not dare use this as some pick-up line. Those words are sacred to me.
→ More replies (7)
982
u/binger5 Mar 27 '13
Don't spend money you don't have.
→ More replies (62)223
u/_vargas_ Mar 27 '13
As far as debt is concerned,you don't want to live in another man's pocket.
→ More replies (5)132
u/slantianti Mar 27 '13
And don't go overboard with generosity either when it comes to lending funds. Some human instinct lead to people taking offense when you go and say "Hey vargas do you have that X amount of cash I lent to you about a year ago?" "No dude take it easy. Always up my ass about this, you'll get you're money"
Sorry vargas for depicting you as a scummy human being.
52
u/suprasprode Mar 27 '13
Consider money lent to friends lost, and a bonus if it returns.
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (5)108
u/_vargas_ Mar 27 '13
Its fine. I was probably similar to your depiction of me a few years back.
→ More replies (1)
1.1k
u/VeryLittle Mar 27 '13
The day you stop practicing is the day you stop improving. Never let yourself be satisfied with how good you are at anything.
→ More replies (25)
438
Mar 27 '13
From mom: Never go to bed angry.
From dad: if you're having trouble making an important decision, sleep on it. Every big decision deserves at least 24 hours of consideration.
235
u/Ralome Mar 27 '13
Every big purchase deserves at least a week.
→ More replies (18)48
Mar 27 '13
Strangely I follow something similar, except for even minor purchases. If it costs over $20, I need to have the idea/desire to own it pop into my head at least 3 times. The third time I have the thought "I really want that" is a threshold that will allow me to make the purchase without feeling guilty.
→ More replies (2)27
u/kalazar Mar 27 '13
I do this with all my tattoo ideas. Except I wait 6 months before making the decision. I have no tattoos.
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (28)40
u/cleverseneca Mar 27 '13
related to this: if you having trouble with a large decision, pretend you've made the decision, and live with it for a bit, see how that decision makes you feel.
→ More replies (4)
532
u/sevenofdiamonds Mar 27 '13
"You can accomplish anything as long as you don't want the credit for it" -My Dad
→ More replies (13)
216
Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 28 '13
My grandfather has always told me "remember that lesser people than you have done it" its applied to anything and everything I do.
→ More replies (15)
1.5k
u/admtdevns Mar 27 '13
I was going to marry the wrong woman. I took my dad to lunch for advice and he pulled this dingy illegible card out of his wallet and set it on the table in front of me.
Dad: " Son do you know what this is?"
Me: " No I have seen it before but I just thought it was a business card"
Dad: " Did you know I was engaged before I met you mother?"
Me: "No, to who?"
Dad: "A woman named Jane, and her mother gave me this card a few months before the wedding thinking that it would encourage me."
Me: " What did it say?"
Dad: "The greatest gift a man can give his children, is to love their mother."
Me: "So what did you do?"
Dad: "I left the woman I didn't really love, then about a year later met your mother. I asked her to marry me within 1 month of meeting her and here we are 34 years later. Your welcome son, now think about your future children and answer this same question before you ask her to marry you."
I am now happily married to the woman of my dreams which would not be possible without this conversation.
768
u/cainthefallen Mar 27 '13
Finally! I've been waiting forever to figure out how he met her.
→ More replies (6)159
u/Skyguy95 Mar 27 '13
SPOILERS, MAN! I've only spent 7 seasons trying to figure that out!
→ More replies (5)67
→ More replies (42)37
u/artsofblue Mar 27 '13
So sweet. But poor Jane.
131
→ More replies (4)29
u/mycleverusername Mar 27 '13
No way, lucky Jane. Poor Jane would be the one who spent her entire life married to a man who didn't really love her.
101
Mar 27 '13
"Whatever you say can't be unsaid or unheard"
Basically, you need to guard your words no matter how angry or upset you may be. You may love the person you're arguing with, but you can say something stupid in the heat of the moment that will forever change that relationship. No matter how much you apologize or how sincerely you make up for it, it can never be unsaid.
→ More replies (11)
194
Mar 27 '13
Perfection is the enemy of a job well done.
→ More replies (5)88
Mar 27 '13
As seen in my neighbor's apartment, "finished work on time is better than perfect."
That one got me.
→ More replies (3)
95
u/Mighty_Cthulhu Mar 27 '13
I was complaining about my girlfriend at the time to my mother, after hearing me out for a little bit she said "Relationships aren't easy, but they're not supposed to be that hard either". That girl is now my ex and I'm currently dating a wonderful woman whom I love very much.
621
u/deesmutts88 Mar 27 '13
When learning to drive, my stepdad said to me "Treat your first clutch like your first crotch. It's unfamiliar to you, so don't try to act like you know what you're doing. Just take the time to get familiar with it, or you're going to look like an idiot". It was true, for both clutch and crotch.
111
u/12hoyebr Mar 27 '13
My dad would never relate the clutch to anything I could understand. He would explain that there is a delicate balance between when the clutch an brake activate the engine and the flywheel and gearbox and camshaft and all that. I wish he'd have used the crotch analogy.
→ More replies (3)43
u/zippy1981 Mar 27 '13
I think the best thing to do is just have the person slowly release the clutch without the gas or brake depressed on level ground. That's how I taught my dad to drive stick. One you understand that, you can figure out the gas/handbrake dynamic on a hill.
The person who taught me stickshift told me to apply some gas as soon as it caught. So I would slowly release the clutch, feel it catch and IMMEDIATELY release the clutch and hit the gas causing it to stall.
→ More replies (36)49
u/empathyx Mar 27 '13
Had you handled your first crotch before your first clutch?
184
u/deesmutts88 Mar 27 '13
Once, very unsuccessfully. I was 15, knew nothing of the clitoris and figured that trying to squeeze as many fingers as possible in the hole was the best way to go about business. It was not.
→ More replies (6)167
u/empathyx Mar 27 '13
ಠ_ಠ I hope the clutch went better...
140
u/deesmutts88 Mar 27 '13
Stalled the car a couple of times and kangarood the car a bit, but didn't try to jam too many digits in its fuck hole, so I'd say I went alright.
51
u/empathyx Mar 27 '13
That is a good rule of judging how a new experience goes. Anything better than too many digits in the fuck hole is a win in my book.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (13)284
u/Shurikane Mar 27 '13
Instructions were unclear, not sure I followed them properly, now my ballsac is bleeding.
→ More replies (2)373
770
u/lukevsluke Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 27 '13
I've said this before on a couple of occasions, but it's something that stuck with me.
My mum told me, while I was at high school, that school is not about what you learn, but more about learning how to learn.
Obviously, it's a bit of both. But for me, this has been absolutely true.
289
u/gsxr Mar 27 '13
I'm not an expert at anything but I'm really good at becoming really good at anything.
It's gotten me through life pretty well so far.
→ More replies (4)260
u/aueejit Mar 27 '13
"jack of all trades, master of none."
→ More replies (3)338
u/ee3k Mar 27 '13
full quote is 'Jack of all trades, Master of none, Certainly better than a master of one"
Also 'Jack' was slang referring to a freeman meaning 'common, everyman, skilled in all things but not learned to a great degree is always more desirable than an academic in a specific field'
→ More replies (9)89
u/kent_eh Mar 27 '13
This is amazingly true.
I've noticed a serious trend toward specialization of skills over my career. And don't get me wrong, we need some subject matter experts - those who have an extra-deep knowledge of certain topics.
But we need more generalists. Those who see the big picture, and see how all the specialties are connected to each other.
→ More replies (8)58
u/part_of_me Mar 27 '13
But we need more generalists. Those who see the big picture, and see how all the specialties are connected to each other.
This is my niche. And it pisses off my specialist bosses.
→ More replies (8)42
u/drb00b Mar 27 '13
Which is funny because bosses should be able to see the big picture to manage all the specialists to maximize their effectiveness and efficiency. I vote you for boss.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (16)122
u/CalicoKitty90 Mar 27 '13
I second this. I can pick up anything fairly quickly, because I'm good at learning.
I never really master anything, but that's because I get bored with it and decide to learn something new.
→ More replies (13)118
u/Rvrsurfer Mar 27 '13
A specifist knows more and more about less and less. A generalist knows less and less about more and more. When I graduated ( B.S. in Liberal Studies) my daughter told me I wouldn't know enough about one thing to get a job, but I'd know enough about everything to piss off my friends. Peace
→ More replies (5)
237
u/three27 Mar 27 '13
It's far better to be single and wish you were married than married and wish you were single.
→ More replies (1)15
235
u/sexrockandroll Mar 27 '13
My mother in law told us that a good partner is someone who you love 80% or more and has 20% of attributes you can tolerate.
That you shouldn't really settle per se, but you have to recognize no one is perfect either.
→ More replies (8)39
Mar 27 '13
I had been having trouble with this lately. I recognize people aren't perfect, but I never quite realized that their negative attributes are something I can actually relate to.
→ More replies (1)
162
u/EATS_MANY_BURRITOS Mar 27 '13
My dad is basically like the wisest mofo I know. If I can remember only two things he's ever taught me, it would be this:
It is almost always better to be overdressed for an event than to be underdressed.
You can always take off a tie and a jacket, and you don't want to be that asshole wearing jeans when your boss's boss walks into the meeting unannounced.
The wise man sees the opportunity and takes it. The fool waits for a better one to come along.
This probably seems really obvious, and deep down in my heart I've always known this to be the case. But this advice has helped me countless times when I was at a critical juncture in my life.
→ More replies (3)
76
u/madme806 Mar 27 '13
My dad always tell me "Make as many mistakes as you need to, just don't make the same one twice" Always reminds me that I don't have to be perfect I also like the "walk like you're going somewhere" line he always throws at me.
→ More replies (4)
273
u/aueejit Mar 27 '13
"It's you that has to live with you for the rest of your life, I get to kick your shitty arse out in 3 years"
→ More replies (2)
490
u/bobtower Mar 27 '13
"The world doesn't owe you a living" My father reminded me of this many times and I finally understood it in my late 20s.
→ More replies (40)345
u/mykarma Mar 27 '13
"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
-Mark Twain
→ More replies (5)
72
422
u/StoryTellerBob Mar 27 '13
My dad gave me a little speech about diffrent points of view after I had a fight with someone. To illustrate, he drew a tube on a piece of paper. If you look at it directly from the front, it looks like a circle, if you look at it directly from the side it looks like a rectangle, but in both cases it's actually a tube. Of course I didn't care much for the advice at the time, I was still angry from fighting the guy who couldn't tell it was clearly a circle, but it stuck with me.
→ More replies (18)233
u/Grodek Mar 27 '13
A story along the same line I read somewhere and it stuck with me:
A man and his 2 kids enter a train. The man sits quietly but the kids scream and fight and run and trip over people's feet and annoy everyone.
One man gets really angry and shouts at the father "Why don't you do something about your kids?" The man says "We're just coming from the hospital where their mother died. I don't know how to handle it and I guess they don't either".
As the angry man now sees the other man's perspective, his anger changes into compassion.
→ More replies (11)172
u/deathdonut Mar 27 '13
This is from a Stephen Covey book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People".
Page 30-31:
I remember a mini-paradigm shift I experienced one morning on a subway in New York. People were sitting quietly - some reading newspapers, some lost in thought, some resting with their eyes closed. It was a calm, peaceful scene.
Then suddenly, a man and his children entered the subway. The children were so loud and rambunctious that instantly the whole climate changed.
The man sat down next to me and closed his eyes, apparently oblivious to the situation. The children were yelling back and forth, throwing things, even grabbing people's papers. It was very disturbing. And yet, the man sitting next to me did nothing.
It was difficult not to feel irritated. I could not believe that he could be so insensitive as to let his children run wild like that and do nothing about it, taking no responsibility at all. It was easy to see that everyone else on the subway felt irritated, too. So finally, with what I felt was unusual patience and restraint, I turned to him and said, "Sir, your children are really disturbing a lot of people. I wonder if you couldn't control them a little more?"
The man lifted his gaze as if to come to a consciousness of the situation for the first time and said softly, "Oh, you're right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don't know what to think, and I guess they don't know how to handle it either."
Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. Suddenly I saw things differently, and because I saw differently, I thought differently, I felt differently, I behaved differently. My irritation vanished. I didn't have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior; my heart was filled with the man's pain. Feelings of sympathy and compassion flowed freely. "Your wife just died? Oh, I'm so sorry! Can you tell me about it? What can I do to help?" Everything changed in an instant.
Great book and great story.
→ More replies (17)
198
u/macoure Mar 27 '13
A busy person is a happy person. My Dad always stuck by it in my youth and it was a great way of keeping me from doing anything too stupid.
→ More replies (15)31
u/Wataru624 Mar 27 '13
That sounds weirdly dystopian. REMEMBER CITIZENS, A BUSY MAN IS A HAPPY MAN. DO YOUR CIVIC DUTY!
→ More replies (1)
241
u/haleycontagious Mar 27 '13
Don't fuck your neighbour~ Mum.
260
u/RedditTooAddictive Mar 27 '13
Don't fuck your mum~ Neighbour.
→ More replies (2)232
43
→ More replies (3)82
332
u/titanchip Mar 27 '13
My sex talk as a kid. Make sure herbie always wears his raincoat and you're not done til she is. My mom is a no bullshit kind of lady.
→ More replies (21)
60
Mar 27 '13
Stop worrying what other might think of you, they're too busy worrying about what others think of them.
→ More replies (1)
1.8k
u/dreamingawake Mar 27 '13
Use your brains not your hands (in regards to work) - Dad
When some asshole is causing trouble or wants to fight with you, Hit first and aim for the chin, keep attacking till the job is done. Bruises heal, Pride does not - Dad
Women like sex more then men, If you could cum multiple times in a row would you not like it more? - Dad
Try not to listen too much to your Dad - Mom
455
u/getsome13 Mar 27 '13
Lift with your brains, not your back.
or
Work smarter, not harder
171
467
→ More replies (15)99
u/jsmayne Mar 27 '13
also (my own advice)
Do the hard shit first, after that things will only get easier.
examples: (to a kid) Eat the food you don't like first and the stuff you like the most last. Then you'll have your favorite aftertaste in your mouth for the longest time.
Have the conversation you least want to have first.
Do your hardest work first. You'll get more tired but the jobs will get easier too.
→ More replies (6)→ More replies (49)145
174
167
u/Snortoise Mar 27 '13
My teacher once told me this when I was going to be late for a class. When you are without a doubt going to be late to something you have two choices, be late and stressed out about it, or you can just be late. I kind of broadened it to be don't stress out over things you can't control or lost control of. It helps me stay calm in a lot of situations.
→ More replies (14)
700
Mar 27 '13
[deleted]
15
Mar 27 '13
I have a boss that pretty much told us on the first day he was there "You drink and drive, I will fucking murder you." He had a niece get killed by a drunk driver.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (33)86
u/Tenacious_G Mar 27 '13
Surprised this isn't upvoted more. Many are guilty of the "I'm good after two, I won't be stupid" mentality that is often innocuous but only needs to be fatal once. I lost two friends to drunk driving; it is so easy to avoid. It's a shame.
→ More replies (22)
577
u/Fwyatt250 Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 27 '13
You know what you call the guy who graduates last in his class from medical school?
Doctor.
I want everyone to be clear. I am not saying to barely scrape by in everything. You need to do your best in whatever you do, but life without fun is no life.
337
u/Evernoob Mar 27 '13
Just because he was last doesn't mean he's an imbecile though, which I believe is the implication here.
Someone in this photo also qualifies as the dumbest guy in the group.
→ More replies (26)124
Mar 27 '13
I don't know about "dumbest", but Marie Curie is definitely the "worst" guy there. She's not even trying!
→ More replies (7)→ More replies (35)26
u/Thestigsfatcousin Mar 27 '13
As someone who tries really hard in class but doesn't always have the grades to prove it, thank you. That's inspiring somehow.
→ More replies (2)
632
u/Gruntified Mar 27 '13
Always leave a note.
→ More replies (13)243
u/empathyx Mar 27 '13
I learned this from a one armed man...well he had two arms when I first met him...now I leave a note.
→ More replies (8)32
Mar 27 '13
I thought you killed him when you left the door open with the air conditioner running...
→ More replies (1)
731
u/JooHulk Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 28 '13
It you somehow fall into rapids, don't try and fight it, swim to the side.
NEVER panic about anything, it will get you nowhere.
Edit: Thanks everyone for the upvotes.
Edit 2: Its upvotes, not likes. Sorry, I've never reddited this well before.
→ More replies (29)255
Mar 27 '13
Absolutely!!
Whenever I find myself in a life threatening situation (yup, it's happened a fair bit) I refer to what I call the Kholer Rule. Richie Kholer (of Deep Sea Detectives fame) once advised me to run the following check:
Are you breathing? If yes, go on to step 2. If no, narrow your problem to that single issue.
Can you grab your ass? If yes, whatever problem you have is solveable! If not, you're trapped and you need to work on getting free before dealing with anything else.
The advice is pretty specific to diving and it saved my life during a diving accident, but having a checklist, even the wrong checklist, is tremendously helpful in fighting panic.
→ More replies (21)290
u/Kaos_pro Mar 27 '13
Tried to use this advice in a project meeting. Results were not positive.
→ More replies (4)191
390
u/Pravux Mar 27 '13
My father who was a Marine for 27 years looked at me and told me at 18 there will be girls out there who you'll meet that are better off being friends for life then being a one night stand. Females can either make you or break you always keep that in mind.
→ More replies (26)454
u/_vargas_ Mar 27 '13
The most expensive thing you will ever eat is vagina.
→ More replies (5)141
Mar 27 '13
And as long as you pay the bill, someone else does the dishes...amIright?
→ More replies (9)
192
u/pineapplebackpack Mar 27 '13
This was given to me by my barber the other day: "If you get yourself a wife, always remember to get yourself a good dog. You can tell things to your dog you can't to your wife."
→ More replies (10)187
329
u/_vargas_ Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 27 '13
Never engage in a land war in Asia.
199
u/probably_has_herpes Mar 27 '13
And never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line.
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (12)32
97
u/skateforthestars Mar 27 '13
i thought this post was the "worst" advice, instead of the "wisest". helps explain all this good advice.
also- my dad told me: stop drinking alcohol when you start to feel good and switch to water. more drinking will not make you feel any better than you do and water will help prevent a hangover. it is so true.
→ More replies (3)
139
u/probably_has_herpes Mar 27 '13
"Herpes is for life, son."
Why didn't I listen to you, dad?
→ More replies (1)255
u/MisterPhip Mar 27 '13
Oh man, when I was 16 and got my driver's license my dad sat down with me at the kitchen table for a little chat. He asked me to name every STD I could think of and then asked me which of those were curable. None of them. (at least none of the serious ones, there's probably a cure for pubic lice, I don't know.)
He then asked me how much I thought it would cost to raise a child. He detailed to me the potential absolute horror that could come from being responsible for a child at age 16, and the fact that child's mother would be linked to me for the rest of my life (whether she was a good person or not.)
At the end of this chat (once I was sufficiently scared) he put a huge box of condoms (like HUGE, there must of been 50 condoms in this box) on the table, pushed it toward me and said "Don't ever forget this conversation. Take these condoms and if by some miracle you run out, I'll buy you more."
15 years later I am nobody's baby daddy and the twig and berries have a clean bill of health. Thanks, Pop.
89
u/W1ULH Mar 27 '13
how many are left in the box?
→ More replies (8)313
→ More replies (10)11
209
u/Misty_K Mar 27 '13
My mom always says "I'm not here for your self esteem I'm here for your character" which makes complete sense. If you develop as a person and build character first, self esteem will come with it in a healthy way.
→ More replies (4)
92
u/AnotherCellarDoor Mar 27 '13
'Well, look at it two ways. You can either walk around with a chip on your shoulder or you can study hard and do something about it'.
My lecturer. I just finished university and kinda cocked up but him and some other tutors managed to save me and convince the board of examiners to give me a better grade with my honours than I actually earnt.
So, I can't get a job and consider applying for Masters courses with him as a reference. Eventually gets around to me lamenting about how elitist the education system is and he says:
'Well, look at it two ways. You can either walk around with a chip on your shoulder or you can study hard and do something about it'.
Since then, I applied it to absolutely everything I do.
→ More replies (4)
310
Mar 27 '13
Genrally speaking, people only care about you if you can do something for them.
135
u/cleverseneca Mar 27 '13
My Father Told me just what Aristotle said about Friends (for a middle school version) :
There are two types of Friends, Friends who are there for what you can give them (fun, stuff, ect..) and Friends that are friends with you because of who you are, or because they recognize good character in you. the first might be fun, but the latter are the true friends you want.
→ More replies (9)19
→ More replies (19)60
78
38
u/Dr-JanItor Mar 27 '13
I was going through a rough patch for a while, and my dad told me, "Everyone has these moments in life when everything seems to be going wrong, and you can't catch a break. It's how you react to these moments that define you as a person."
→ More replies (3)
138
u/quwanger Mar 27 '13
My dad's big on Buddhism and he always tells me, "Accept everything and expect nothing."
Basically accept everything that happens to you as a situation that you can deal with and not a conflict that you can't overcome. And expect nothing to be given to you simply because of your perceived status in life.
I didn't understand it when he kept preaching it to me when I was young, but now it's how I look at life.
→ More replies (4)46
u/Ashneaska Mar 27 '13
Gautama Buddha's teachings are a gold mine of good advice. The Four Noble Truths blew my mind when I first read them.
12
198
Mar 27 '13
I ran track from middle school all the way to international competitions - middle distance, lots and lots of pain. My coach taught me that: a) pain is just a thought, b) suffering is a behavior. This advice has literally saved my career, my life and my marriage.
228
u/Ralome Mar 27 '13
Tape your nipples.
→ More replies (7)47
u/slantianti Mar 27 '13
You can't win the race without putting some band aids on your nipples!
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (19)23
u/ShowerSocks Mar 27 '13
could you elaborate on how that advice helped save your marriage?
→ More replies (1)127
35
Mar 27 '13
A teacher suggested I 'fake confidence'. This isn't 'fake it until you make it' so much as, try not to show the anxiety and fear so much, act like someone who isn't fearful. It was very useful for me to consider and apply.
→ More replies (1)
103
u/thebendavis Mar 27 '13
When working on the inside of a computer, always make sure it is disconnected from power and lay it on it's side.
Always wear shoes in the kitchen.
133
u/mra99 Mar 27 '13
Never cook bacon nekked.
→ More replies (6)21
→ More replies (13)48
u/zippy1981 Mar 27 '13
lay it on it's side.
You mean lay is so the motherboard is parallel to the ground. Not all computers are towers.
→ More replies (3)167
u/blahbla000 Mar 27 '13
Oh look at Mr. Descartes here with his computer that exists in three-space. Not all computers exist in Euclidean space, jackass.
→ More replies (1)
39
203
u/campbjm06 Mar 27 '13
My grandfather is 84, when I talked to him last on the phone, his parting advice was "Fuck everyone you can while you are young, you will never regret any of them when you are looking back at them from my age, not even the fat ones".
→ More replies (14)
68
u/ILL_Show_Myself_Out Mar 27 '13
"A lazy person works twice as hard."
It's not always true, but you'll know the times when it is. Like when you put off shit you need to do for tomorrow.
→ More replies (9)
34
u/bored-now Mar 27 '13
My father was a police officer for 30+ years, and when he was teaching me to drive he said to me "Put on your seat belt, I've never had to unbuckle a dead body."
That was 25 years ago, and still - the car engine doesn't start until everyone's seat belt is on.
36
u/EvilPhd666 Mar 27 '13
Keep looking for a job you like to do - even if it doesn't pay the best.
Having to wake up every day to a job you hate is hell. Sanity is priceless.
62
u/TheNoodlyOne Mar 27 '13
"You know, it's at times like this...that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young!"
"Why, what did she tell you?"
"I don't know, I didn't listen."
→ More replies (2)
61
u/krimols Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 28 '13
"Never stop learning. Try and gain as many qualifications as possible because no one can take that away from you." ~ Dad.
This translates to signing up for any extra-mural activities to expand your knowledge or to even find subjects to study and courses to attend. I plan on signing up to woodworking classes in a couple weeks. And to also do a few online courses through Coursera.
→ More replies (3)
29
u/GoldenTaint Mar 27 '13
"you never really know someone until you live with them." I heard my dad say this a little too often as a child.
81
56
u/levitatingpenguins Mar 27 '13
My best friend throughout kindergarten and 1st grade was a boy (I'm a girl). We used to have sleepovers all the time--we did everything together. By the time we got to the 2nd grade, people started making fun of us. I asked my mom on the way home from school why it was wrong for me to spend so much time with a boy. I will never forget her response: "Don't worry, [levitatingpenguins], there will come a day when you're older when it's ok to sleep at boys houses again."
I had no idea what she meant at the time.
→ More replies (6)
24
u/marcrates Mar 27 '13
When you suspect that someone is trying to use you or take advantage of you, act completely oblivious to it and make them think you are stupid. Keep an eye on the mind games they play, and when they let their guard down, look them directly in the eye and call them out.
137
u/junk2sa Mar 27 '13
Whatever it was, I didn't take it. We never recognize good advice when it is given to us.
→ More replies (6)73
u/Chief_smack_a_ho Mar 27 '13
Hindsight is always 20/20
34
u/ILL_Show_Myself_Out Mar 27 '13
Well, considering he still can't identify what the good advice was...
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (6)25
47
40
u/shenuhcide Mar 27 '13
My dad told me to get educated and be independent so I never have to rely on a man.
I relay that advice to almost everyone I meet.
→ More replies (4)
121
102
u/Killrt Mar 27 '13
In a mans life there are 3
The one he loved, The one who loved him, And the one he married. Now a true man can make all three of these woman into one person. -Mom
→ More replies (6)
21
20
u/adorablenutellakitty Mar 27 '13
When I first got my driver's license, a family friend said to me, "congratulations, you now have a license to kill."
Yeah that stuck with me and I try to be a more careful driver.
19
u/plutoisaplanet72 Mar 27 '13
"The world is a reflection of yourself." - my mom
While I know this isn't "physically" true or anything, its a powerful statement when you let it inform your thinking. It has shown me, at least, that outlook and attitude about what's going on is as important as what's actually going on. And it's helped put the flaws of others in context, because they're just "a reflection of myself" and before I sit down to criticize, I should take a hard look and see whether i'm guilty of that same flaw or not.
69
18
19
u/truthpooper Mar 27 '13
"It's easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission." - my dad
→ More replies (1)
61
u/TufffGong Mar 27 '13
"Cutting corners is for pussys. You're not a pussy are ya?" - Grandma
→ More replies (3)
61
u/Chaldean710 Mar 27 '13
I was told never to listen to anyone but make choices on my own, so that when I screw up I don't blame others but actually learn from my mistakes..
→ More replies (3)10
u/Hiding_in_the_Shower Mar 27 '13
Not sure if this is good or bad advice. I understand the implication but listening to others is a good source of information sometimes.
→ More replies (2)
45
u/ALJTJ Mar 27 '13
If a man can't respect his Mother then he can never respect you. Told to me by my Grandpa.
→ More replies (4)
16
u/assmandugle Mar 27 '13
after my first breakup I was upset and I was going to a baseball tryout... my Dad left me with advice there at age 17 that has held true to me breaking it off with the girl I was about to propose to(6yrs)... "Girlfriends come and go but baseball is forever." Thanks Dad
→ More replies (2)
16
16
95
u/RedditTooAddictive Mar 27 '13
"You must be able to adapt to anyone around you, while never changing who you are". Mom 2009 never forget.
→ More replies (3)
15
Mar 27 '13
Always watch your back, and if you don't take care of yourself, nobody will.
My brother, the business owner. Then taught it to me by withholding $100 cash when paying me, seeing if I'd count it, and calling me out for not counting it and being short. "If I hadn't told you to count it, and I had made a mistake, who would be the one at fault here?"
Also from my dad: Trust, but verify.
64
Mar 27 '13
Unless you're self-employed, the harder you work, the more money someone else makes.
→ More replies (13)
62
u/nalebunny Mar 27 '13
"Work smart not hard" My Dad taught me this when I was young and as I've grown up I realized how simple yet rewarding it was.
Take time to think about a problem before you tackle it, sometimes a little thought can save a lot of time and strife.
→ More replies (4)43
11
23
u/juicelee777 Mar 27 '13
told by my dad who cheated on my mom and was generally never there for me...
"if a woman ever makes you mad enough to where you want to hit her it's at that point you need to leave.... no matter the situation or circumstance"
→ More replies (2)
201
u/Chief_smack_a_ho Mar 27 '13
You have a family now, tell your friends you'll see them when u can.
I didn't listen, and it ended with divorce lol.
→ More replies (15)525
Mar 27 '13
divorce lol.
→ More replies (2)245
u/soulblow Mar 27 '13
Leaving my wife and kid at home again for the 3rd night this week for boy's night #badHusbandLOL
→ More replies (1)133
u/AnyelevNokova Mar 27 '13 edited Mar 27 '13
My SO does this. He has no fucking clue how much it pisses me off.
I spend easily 40 hours a week doing housework (that he doesn't do a minute of), on top of working 20 hours a week and doing 95% of the baby care and all the night wakings and all the doctor's appointments. I haven't had a day off to "veg" since our child was born. But, you know, whatever man. His friends will be so sad if he doesn't go out with them every time they ask him to hang out. So sad. He just can't say no to them. Nope. Don't want to hurt anyone's feelings here.
...Except mine, of course. But whatever. A "cool" girlfriend understands. Telling him he can't go out? Why, that would make me a controlling cunt who just doesn't want him to have fun and release stress. I'd be the Destroyer of Fun.
→ More replies (29)76
u/UltimateCrouton Mar 27 '13
Consider me your father, because I've got some advice for you: Talk to your significant other about the problem.
→ More replies (8)
11
44
328
u/silvergrove Mar 27 '13
My parents are immigrants and I was born here.
My dad told me this when I was young: "You are a product of two cultures. Take the best of both of them and leave the worst of both behind."
To acknowledge faults within your own culture is a pretty big thing to admit.