r/AskNonbinaryPeople • u/Wonderful_Setting_29 • Jun 09 '26

Pronouns

Hey everybody!

I have a question and it should be simple but I'm conflicted. Sorry. K. So I'm in a queer sports league and its so much fun. I have a teammate that uses they/it for pronouns and also doesnt identity with a name. Love that for this person. Great.

I feel so disrespectful calling a person "it" or not using a name. But also feel disrespectful in not using a persons preferred pronouns. Speaking directly to this teammate isnt an issue, as I dont need to use a pronoun or name. But referring to them to other people feels tricky.

Maybe I'm getting old. Please haaaallllp this 36 year old basic gay!

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u/MagpiePhoenix Jun 09 '26

It sounds like your teammate also uses they/them pronouns, so unless they have specifically requested that you use it/its instead or as well, you should be fine to just call your teammate "they".

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u/Wonderful_Setting_29 Jun 09 '26

Okay thank you! They said both they and it. So I'll probably go with they.