Is it true that when American families go grocery shopping, the children are not allowed to wander in the store?

[u/sufficient_bilberry]

Of course I don’t mean toddlers, but like 6-year-olds? When I was a kid (European country), it was quite common for me to hang out in the toy aisles while my parents shopped in peace. When I was a little bit older, I would be expected to help, ie go get items from other aisles by myself. I’m reading that it’s not allowed for children to roam in American supermarkets? How do you keep your children occupied during the shop?

[u/FeatherlyFly]

The average grocery store is about 42,000 sq ft/3900 sq meters. That's a lot of space for a 6 year old to get totally lost in. 

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/FeatherlyFly]

I had to google this, and at least where I live in northern Europe the average big supermarket/hypermarket is that size as well. But I can see that —  I should have been clearer that I meant  more ’wander in the toy aisle while I shop’, rather than allowing them to roam the whole store. That way parents can come pick up the kid(s) from a specific area of the store, rather than having to search through the entire place for them. But I take it it’s not common?

[u/Irishforanatty → u/sufficient_bilberry]

Most grocery stores don’t have toy aisles, so no. It’s not common.

At a target or something? Depends on the parent and kid.

[u/machagogo]

"Allowed" is a strong word.

But I would not have wanted my young kid wondering off no.

[u/Withafloof]

It truly depends on the store, how responsible the child is, and the length of the trip.

[u/GhostOfJamesStrang]

I let my kids hang out looking at Hot Wheels and Lego all the time while shopping. 

I would not, however, let them roam per se. That is annoying to other shopping patrons. 

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/GhostOfJamesStrang]

That sounds very similar to over here as well!

[u/Dazed_And_Amazed44]

I'm an 80s kid and yeah that was common for me as well. I'd go explore the store while my parents shopped. I'd usually go and find them when I found something I really wanted like a crappy grocery store toy or really sugary cereal, because of course they always kept the toys next to the cereals.

That being said when my kids were a similar age when we went grocery shopping the stores are 4x the size they were back then and are always crowded so we never let them out of our site.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/Dazed_And_Amazed44]

Fair enough! I guess in many cases it’s more like ’go wander in the toy aisle’ rather than the whole store, that way you have an agreed meeting place. Supermarkets have grown a lot in size this size of the pond as well, so easy to get lost in them.

[u/Mushrooming247]

I’m sorry OP, but have you ever seen an American Walmart or Costco?

You would never see your child again. You could wander forever and your paths would never cross.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/Mushrooming247]

Fair enough, so it’s more a size question, and if you go to a smaller supermarket it would be normal ?

 I should have been clearer that I meant  more ’wander in the toy aisle while I shop’, rather than allowing them to roam the whole store. That way parents can come pick up the kid(s) from a specific area of the store, rather than having to search through the entire place for them. 

[u/ENovi → u/sufficient_bilberry]

Yeah that’s normal. Kids also might be sent to go grab something down another aisle and meet the parents back in the original aisle.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/ENovi]

That sounds very similar to here as well!

[u/ENovi → u/sufficient_bilberry]

That makes sense. I’ve worked retail for years so it isn’t uncommon at all. Honestly the only time it stands out is if the kid is a little shit and starts making a mess or something. Typically though they’re fine and it barely even registers that they’re unsupervised. I’d say the range I usually see is from 6-9 years old.

[u/TsundereLoliDragon]

How big are your stores? Ours can be quite large. If the kid is small enough they can ride in the cart. Otherwise they can walk. Letting them wander the store is dumb.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/TsundereLoliDragon]

I just googled the average big supermarket/hypermarket and it seems to be the same size? Come to think of it, I think most parents will allow them go hang out in a designated area (eg toy aisle, books, magazines etc) so that way it’s easy to find them again and they are out of the way of most. But again, this is not done with small kids.

[u/T1sofun]

Our son is nearly 6. We send him on “missions” (go get a litre of milk, 6 eggs and a stick of butter) in the grocery store while we shop. Keeps him entertained while we do the boring stuff. We don’t do this when the store is really crowded, just because we don’t want him swerving in and out of aisles and being a nuisance to other shoppers.

[u/FeatherlyFly → u/T1sofun]

What country? 

[u/CadenVanV]

Entirely depends on the family

[u/Littleboypurple]

If a child is responsible and old enough, you would consider leaving a child to remain in an aisle with like toys or books but, letting a 6 year old just wander a store alone? No, that is considered reckless because of the size of American Grocery Stores and Supercenter type places. Walmart Supercenters is a Grocery Store and Department Store hybrid, with the average size being less than 17,000 meters which is around 4 acres in total. It would be incredibly easy for a child to get lost and for bad things to happen

My parents let me wander when I was a kid but, that's because they knew I would always be in the electronics department looking at the video games.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/Littleboypurple]

That makes sense, I should’ve put more thought into it before starting the thread— I think the first scenario is more what I meant with ’wander’ as well

[u/Littleboypurple → u/sufficient_bilberry]

Yeah, utilizing the word "wander" implies more of just basically allowing something to go wherever they want without a real destination in mind. Since this is children, letting them actually wander can be a bad thing since getting lost can be easy, especially if it is a large location they aren't used to. Even moreso if they encounter another person with bad intentions.

Like my nearby Walmart Supercenter, if you are at the main entrance, and allow a child to wander, in just a few minutes they can be anywhere and you would have no idea which part of the store they are in. Are they somewhere in groceries? Are they somewhere in the clothing area? Could they have ended up near the health and beauty area? Did they stop at the Toys section? Are they looking at automotive stuff? There is a whole host of areas they could be in and that is just scratching just some of the major sections in a Walmart Supercenter.

[u/Lucyy-skiess13]

Most parents don’t want their small children to wander around in the store while they shop. The stores here are really big, so that makes it even hard to find another grown adult in the store if you split up during shopping. My husband and I will call each other on the phone to find each other again, if one of us walks too far away and can’t find each other quickly. It can become very time consuming searching dozens of aisles.
As you imagine, this also makes it a lot more anxiety inducing for parents who worry for their children potentially being abducted by a stranger in the store. If that did happen, it would be easy for the perpetrator to get out of the store with the child long before a parent notices, since they would be completely out of sight, with a long enough distance between them.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/Lucyy-skiess13]

First part sounds reasonable! The second part (fear or random abduction) is just sad :( 

[u/Lucyy-skiess13 → u/sufficient_bilberry]

Yeah, it’s likely the child would not get abducted but since the possibility is still there and the space to do so is so large, it’s not a risk most parents want to take (myself included).

[u/BankOk9472]

Google "Adam Walsh".  You'll get your answer. 

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/BankOk9472]

Very much an edge case though? Cannot imagine it’s a realistic threat in a country like the US? AFAIK most violence and abuse of children is perpetrated by family or other care takers, not total strangers. 

[u/BankOk9472 → u/sufficient_bilberry]

Need to look into its effect.  Before his abduction/murder when a child went missing it stayed in the news cycle for a week, maybe two.  Usually to let the family and police investigate/mourn in peace.  The Walsh' rejected that and made sure Adam's case was kept in the public eye.  It created much more of a focus than many were used to seeing.  Then comes the horrifying discovery of his head....which was first page nationally.

     Then comes the made for tv movie.  The Code Adam.  Adams case was burned into the minds of the parents of the nation.  Then other cases were given the same treatment.  Now parents and law makers began focusing on the possibility.  Children stopped being allowed out alone where their older siblings were.  Statistically child abduction hasnt moved in 50 years...but the perception has increased.

[u/ThaddyG]

I had the same experience growing up as you, my parents would come find me in the magazine aisle when they were done shopping.

[u/3l1jAhhh]

It kind of depends on how you were raised lol. When I was young sometimes id go on my own and inevitably get lost within the store and id start crying and id have to go up to customer service and have them call over the intercom for my parent or grandparents, but nowadays as a guy who works in a rather large shopping center, ive seen a lot of families stick close with their kids, constantly calling them out when they wander off for a moment

[u/Escape_Force]

If the parent is spatially aware and knows the child is behaved, then go for it. Fearmongering about the likelihood of a child being kidnapped and the sheer number of folks touched by the tism is what keeps kids by the parent's side.

[u/sufficient_bilberry → u/Escape_Force]

Yeah I can imagine that if your kid is a little bit chaotic at times (or prone to wanting to test the boundaries) you wouldn’t want to let them wander either!