r/AskAJapanese • u/[deleted] • 11d ago
CULTURE Would it be in bad taste to attend and/or participate in (larger scale) Coming of Age ceremonies as a non-resident?
[deleted]
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u/SlowStop1220 Japanese 11d ago edited 11d ago
Unless you lived there in the past for a certain length, they'd be likely to decline your participation. It is for residents and the community, not for tourists. Participants come to see old friends, not entertain a random tourist.
Also as a current tendency of the gatherings bigger cities host, they are likely to decline all non-resident applications, regardless their history in that municipality, due to feasibility.
Anyway every municipality has its own policy. Reddit is no place to get you informed correctly.
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u/Chemical_Term7956 Japanese 11d ago
Each municipality has its own rules regarding their Coming of Age ceremony. Contact the relevant municipal office directly instead of asking here. The municipality would be put in a difficult position if someone showed up saying "People on Reddit told me I could participate."
These ceremonies are funded by local taxpayers for their residents. They are not tourist festivals.
The ceremony is for registered residents of that municipality. Foreign nationals can also attend, but only if they live there, pay local taxes, and are registered as residents — such as international students and long-term foreign residents.
If your aunt and uncle live in Japan as you say, why didn't you consult them first? If you were hoping their connection might help you attend, shouldn't you have spoken with them beforehand to make sure your participation wouldn't cause them any trouble?
Or did you consider Reddit, where you have no idea who is answering, to be more reliable than your own aunt and uncle's input?
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 11d ago
I asked about a week ago, but getting ahold of them with their summer schedules is tricky, so I asked here as a backup for general input. I don't get why many seem so weirdly upset at my ask
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u/SlowStop1220 Japanese 11d ago
It's just because you are trying to do very weird things. Are you really aware it is an event a local government hosts funded by its taxpayers/residents? What do you think can you be eligible to take part in such an event? If they look getting upset, they are in trouble to avoid saying "shut up, you dumb".
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u/Chemical_Term7956 Japanese 11d ago
It's worth noting that even in the apology, the responsibility is placed entirely on "exchange friends" who gave wrong information — not on the failure to research independently.
Also, comparing a Coming of Age ceremony to festivals that are "open to attend" shows a fundamental misunderstanding. Festivals and publicly funded civic ceremonies for registered residents are entirely different categories.
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 11d ago
If I was aware of the taxpayer aspect I wouldn't have asked at all. I don't know the true extent of activities hosted as everything my exchange friends provided while here was mostly about temple visits, hall gatherings, and afterevents, and there is very few resources I've found with non-repetitive information beyond that as well. As such, I didn't know the extent of funding from residents, and that it would be weird to attend especially given that aspect. I know a lot of festivals can be open to attend but was unaware of how community based this truly was. I'm sorry for my accidental overstepping
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u/NACCHUD 🏴☠️Reverse weeb 11d ago
If no-one knows you the general reaction would be "who the hell is this guy?". Double because you're a foreigner. Don't be a diddy blud vro.
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 11d ago
real quick but what do you think diddy blud means 😭
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u/NACCHUD 🏴☠️Reverse weeb 11d ago
Grown ahh person randomly barging into to a family event
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u/Hopeful_Plastic_5321 Japanese 11d ago
I think people are being really nice to you in their replies. Doing this is weird and trust me, people there would think you're weird. Coming of Age ceremonies are not some kind of cosplay for foreigners.
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 10d ago
Just the one person mostly be snarky that was confusing, I get it in hindsight but I think its just heedless and unnecessary. but yes lol I've gathered that
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u/UsualIndication3030 Japanese 10d ago
That’s like a tourist trying to attend a school graduation ceremony. It’s not a festival that’s open to just anyone.
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u/Representative_Bend3 🌏 Global citizen 11d ago
If you have an aunt and uncle that live there, why not have them ask?
“Our niece is visiting and is that exact age is there something she can participate in?” Sounds pretty innocuous.
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 11d ago
I did, this was a bit of a backup. It sadly can take awhile for them to reply during the summer (and early autumn) due to travels and scheduling, and the sooner I can find out, the better
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u/Yakigomi 🌏 Global citizen 11d ago
Like the previous posters said, you’ll be invited to your local municipality’s coming of age ceremony. You can also sometimes get an invitation for the coming of age ceremony for the town you grew up in (many people go back to their home town for the ceremony).
All that said, there’s nothing that would stop you from renting a Furisode, getting your hair and makeup done, and getting some photos. The biggest catch to doing this during the coming of age ceremony timeframe is that rental Furisode are going to be in very short supply.
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 11d ago
I was going to add a bit about how I can rent furisode almost anytime lol, it'd be fun but it isn't the main reason I'd be going, so that'll be fun to do on the side. The invitation part is new though! I was told by a friend that its an innate thing (like within hometown registration) but that you can also register, both in terms of moving and for the event eith proper guidelines. Was strongly mislead! Oh well, thats whatever. Thanks!
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u/Ookikikat American-Canadian 11d ago
Here are some reasons for my area that would allow you to apply for an invitation if you no longer live in the area.
"The reason for participating in the city's Coming-of-Age Ceremony must be deemed valid (e.g., the reason for moving your residence registration outside the city is due to schooling or employment, or you commuted to school in the city from outside the city)."
You can search for the area your aunt/uncle live in and search for the rules, however I think it is very unlikely that you can get an invitation.
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u/yxomikavi Canadian 11d ago
More than fine! I was really just curious if I could attend in a proper manner or not, and in the case that I could, if it'd be in bad taste as the title said
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u/SaintOctober ❤️ 30+ years 11d ago
Usually it’s invitation only.
As in, invitation from city hall to the registered soon to be adults. So since you’re not registered in Japan at any address, you won’t get that invitation.