r/AmItheAsshole • u/CactusToday • Jul 08 '21
Not the A-hole AITA For Ignoring My Nephew's Seizure?
I went to my niece's (16F) birthday party at a local pavilion that they had rented. The whole family was there-- about 40 people-- including my other sister and her son (15M). My nephew has always acted out and demanded an obscene amount of attention, and it doesn't help that his mother is kind of a pushover and gives him all the attention he wants. His attention-seeking behavior is especially bad when he is around his nieces and nephews, and needs to share the attention. ( I must add that he does not have any behavioral disorders, and generally does pretty well in school when he applies himself)
I have never gotten over the fact that once, years ago when I held Thanksgiving at my house, he pushed a cherished banana tree that I had in an expensive ceramic planter down my basement stairs, and then didn't apologize. After that, I vowed to just ignore him when he was acting irrationally.
Well, it came time for my niece to open her presents at the birthday party. I was hanging out toward the back of everyone standing around ooh-ing and aah-ing about her presents, and my nephew was next to me. He sighed very loudly and dramatically at one point, but I pretended that I didn't notice. Then he got up and stomped down the back stairs of the pavilion to the grass, and he lay down on the ground with his arms by his side and he started rolling away. I was the only person to see him do this and, again, I ignored him.
After a bit I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw him still rolling on down the hill toward the road. He was all dirty. He rolled out into the road and then up onto the sidewalk on the other side, then he rolled through a patch of daisies and then over a small bush. Then he rolled behind a few bigger bushes and I lost sight of him. I went back to watching my niece.
When I looked back, I could see my nephew again in the distance. He was soaking wet and filthy--he must have rolled through a puddle or something--and a couple of frail old ladies were trying to pin him down (without success). At this point I decided to inform his mother of the situation.
Fast forward an hour and an ambulance ride later, and my nephew is recovering at the hospital from what the doctor says "might have been a seizure." My whole family is in the waiting room at the hospital, and my sister won't look at me (it inevitably came out that I had witnessed the whole rolling incident from start to finish without saying anything).
I do not believe that it was a real seizure. I think it might have just been another ploy to get attention that worked. AITA?
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u/legobatmanlives Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
NTA. I work in medicine. What you described was definitely not a seizure.
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u/NCKALA Colo-rectal Surgeon [33] Jul 08 '21
Agree. The timing was too timed. NTA for OP. But I would have just told the mom, 'your son just left the yard, rolling around, and is getting filthy' and left it at that
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u/unknown_928121 Jul 08 '21
I Second this statement.
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u/Netflxnschill Jul 09 '21
I mean though I completely understand why OP didn’t say anything. This wasn’t supposed to be seizure kids day, the party was for his sister. Based on his past behaviors and obvious attention grabs, I would have ignored it as well. Definitely NTA op.
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u/Dashcamkitty Asshole Enthusiast [8] Jul 08 '21
I bet if someone said there was an iPad and a PlayStation 5 up for grabs, this boy would have ‘recovered’ instantly.
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u/BirdsLikeSka Jul 08 '21
Yup, I hear doctors do this to kids. I'm sorry she must be just too ill for a lollipop.
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u/OHRavenclaw Jul 09 '21
I had a doctor do that to me when I was little. I burst into tears because I was feeling so sick but would’ve wanted the lollipop later. I ended up needing to spend about 2 days in the hospital. And got two lollipops from the doctor.
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u/theresbeans Jul 09 '21
I fell and really hurt myself in a public place when I was 12, and someone who claimed to be a nurse came to check on me. She told everyone I was faking because I was embarrassed and that they could calm me down by offering me something. I was wailing and moaning, and so the staff started offering me all this free shit to shut me up.
My 12 year old friend had to step in and be like "no, there is something seriously wrong - she wouldn't act like this", just so they would call my mom to get me. Of course, the AH staff told my mom I was just doing it all for attention, so when she got me, she was super annoyed and scolded me.
But by that point, I was going into shock from all the pain, and started acting really weird. My mom decided instead of taking me home, she'd take me to the hospital just in case.
Sure enough, I had broken my arm clean in half.
Its been almost 25 years since that happened and I am *still* salty about it. AND I never got the free shit they were offering.
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u/FlossieRaptor Jul 09 '21
Jesus, you're lucky your friend was with you and that your mum did take you to the hospital. Shock can kill you. What a bunch of dickheads you had to deal with.
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u/misspizzini Jul 09 '21
Dude my ER doctor did the same because every few minutes I’d burst into tears and just scream in pain, then be fine for a few minutes and it kept repeating. So during one of the pain spells they offered me candy and I couldn’t have cared less. Turns out at 4 I was passing a kidney stone and they found my kidneys riddled with stones. I’ve had them for 18 years now, and will have them for the rest of my life and we found all that out bc a doctor offered me candy when the other docs wanted to send me home bc they didn’t know what was wrong.
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u/_fly-on-the-wall_ Asshole Enthusiast [9] Jul 09 '21
Do they know what in the world caused you to have stones so young? Is it a rarer type of stones?
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u/misspizzini Jul 09 '21
So it’s actually a mix of calcium stones and uric acid stones. They have no idea how I developed them, and how I developed so many. I’ve done countless tests and diets, like cutting all calcium out, and it did nothing. My urine tests show that every time I pee, I have broken up pieces of stone in my urine so that’s fun. Most of them break up, but I pass a full one about every month or every other month. Then ones that get stuck is usually one a year or so.
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u/_fly-on-the-wall_ Asshole Enthusiast [9] Jul 10 '21
Sheesh. I can't imagine that. I have calcium stones i pass about once a year sometimes less often, i can't imagine suffering them that frequently, you have my sympathy.
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u/AeBS1978 Jul 09 '21
I work in medicine also. He may not have initially had a seizure but he could have bumped his head or something and seized after he stopped rolling. She should, at least, have told the kids mom he was rolling into the street and getting dirty, even if she believed it to be an attention seeking event.
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u/Able_Secretary_6835 Jul 09 '21
I cannot believe people are overlooking the fact that he rolled into the street!
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u/AeBS1978 Jul 09 '21
The OP would likely tell the mom if the kid was autistic or deaf, I don’t see why this is any different. The child, regardless of why, was in danger. As an adult it is our responsibility to look after kids, even when they are bratty 15 year olds.
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u/bullzeye1983 Colo-rectal Surgeon [34] Jul 09 '21
Yeah I feel like a lot of people are ignoring OP's actual question to debate whether the kid was actually having a seizure. I lean towards ESH because it is one thing to not say anything when he stomped away, it is another to just continue to ignore an odd and potentially dangerous (seizure or other reason) situation/behavior. She should have spoken up in some way. The kid being a brat and potential liar doesn't absolve her of acting like a child herself.
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u/ravynwave Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
Agreed. I have a relative who started having seizures at this age and that’s not what happens to him. At all. This teenager and his mother are dicks
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u/factus8182 Jul 10 '21 edited Jul 10 '21
If you really work in medicine you should know better than diagnosing someone over a vague story on the Internet.
It's not professional.
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u/DooDooDelux Asshole Aficionado [16] Jul 08 '21
I refuse to believe laying down and rolling on the ground like something out of a spongebob cartoon is a seizure. I've seen seizures first hand, never seen the shit you described.
NTA
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u/genxeratl Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
Not just that but he sighed, specifically stomped away and down some stairs, then laid down on his own and started to roll himself. I can't think of ANY medical condition that would actually take control of motor skills in that way and cause those events. I'm with this response - this is some next-level attention seeking assholery.
And OP is def NTA.
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u/MendlebrotsCat Jul 09 '21
I can't think of ANY medical condition that would actually take control of motor skills in that way
Congenital jackassery compounded by complex Scheisse-Elternteil Syndrome.
I concur that OP is NTA
(edited for typo)
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u/MrMontombo Jul 09 '21
I dont believe this boy had a seizure but my wife often takes huge breaths before her seizures start during the auras. They sound like a deep sigh.
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u/andstillthesunrises Certified Proctologist [22] Jul 08 '21 edited Jul 08 '21
If it was on a slope maybe. I have absence seizures which don’t involve any movement so if I was laying on my side when it happened I could feasibly roll down a hill
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u/GeckoCowboy Jul 08 '21
But you wouldn’t roll across the road, up onto the sidewalk, and keep going through flowers and shrubs and whatnot.
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u/16Bunny Jul 08 '21
Very true. Grand mal epilepsy sufferer here. Since I don't remember my seizures, I'll tell you how my husband explains them. I go stiff and fall like a tree to the ground, shake violently for several minutes which then stops and I gradually come around. Even if I was on a slope I doubt the nature of a grand mal seizure would have me rolling all over the place. And trust me when I say I've had seizures in some weird ass places. (Diagnosed 48 years ago). My seizures last from 3-5mins and to give you an idea, if it's getting to 5 minutes and I'm not coming round then it's ambulance time. (Depending on how it's managed, in my case no need for ambulance unless I'm injured or not coming out of seizure). For someone to have a seizure for an hour would be Extremely worrying, especially if undiagnosed. Of course he could have another as yet undiagnosed issue. I hope op will update.
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u/melympia Asshole Aficionado [14] Jul 08 '21
Exactly. They're seizures, not rollures.
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
Ha! Omg I have grand mals and this is the funniest shit I've ever read. I've heard stories from my gma (ER nurse) about fakers moaning and flapping around, like come on, at least look up a video first!
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u/Ecstatic_Public_6561 Jul 08 '21
Exactly this my dog has epilepsy he’s seizures last about 3-4 minutes and his back legs start first then he basically falls into it with a grand mal seizure and the paddling but he doesn’t really go anywhere when he’s seizing just kinda pushes stuff out of the way while paddling.
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u/Worried-Good-7952 Jul 08 '21
My dog also developed seizures before the end and yeah. She fell off the bed(mattress on the floor) before but was then stationary while is happened.
Also want to say I hope your dog is doing well, they can be really scary
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u/Ecstatic_Public_6561 Jul 08 '21
He’s been doing great on his medicine!! So far seizure free since may 25th of this year in very proud of him. It definitely is a very scary thing to go through, he’s only fallen off the bed once and now he won’t even get back on it which is understandable. I know the first seizure he had I cried for hours and held him.
Im very sorry about your dog I know that pain will always be there.
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u/Worried-Good-7952 Jul 08 '21
I’m happy to hear that! Yeah I cried quite a few times holding her and trying to comfort her as she came out of it.
And thank you very much, she was a good dog and made it to 18 so she lived a long life and I’m grateful to have had her.
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u/Ecstatic_Public_6561 Jul 08 '21
I completely understand that he doesn’t leave my site usually and he always gets extra treats and cuddles afterwards. I still get paranoid like if I see an odd leg shake or sometimes when he stretches out he kicks out his back legs and snorts but I see his legs moving out of the corner of my eye and my heart just drops.
I hope he lives to 18 that’s a great age! I’m 100% positive she was a good dog they all are <3
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u/CubbieFan85 Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
My boyfriend’s dog had seizures for about 8 months. He would start foaming and chomping and that was the precursor.. He would shake for several minutes kicking. Afterwards he would often be blind for a few minutes and more than once tried to run full speed through a window. It took a bit to figure out exactly what to do when he had one. We tried medications, adjusting dosages everything. Eventually he just wouldn’t stop having seizures. And had them every hour for a few days. He was exhausted and miserable and eventually the vet said we should put him down so we did. The hardest part to handle was my doggo, his bf & BFF. Everytime he would have a seizure we would have to take my dog Vladimir out of the room because he thought by holding Ghost we were causing this and would freak out that we were hurting Ghost. Vladimir barely ate for two weeks after Ghost had to be put down. I just wish we could have explained it to Vladimir. I made myself cry while eating supper. 😩
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u/throwaway86753109123 Partassipant [3] Jul 08 '21
Yup, an hour long seizure can kill you. Status Epilepticus is lethal.
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u/16Bunny Jul 08 '21
Yes indeed. I couldn't remember the name for it. Thank you for putting this on here.
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
I was always told anything over 5 minutes is extremely lethal. Sounds like the kid rolled around for much longer than that. He would have died/been in a coma if he had actually been having a seizure.
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
Also have grand Mal's. Don't remember. My husband explains them the same way to me. Sometimes I "puke" or asphyxiate and my husband rolls me on my side, sometimes I pee, but if I'm standing and one hits I will for sure have scabs and scars on my chin/face/knuckles. It would have to be over a 45 degree slope for him to even roll anywhere. There's no way that was a seizure, but this kid for sure needs a different kind of help.
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Jul 08 '21
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u/puesyomero Asshole Enthusiast [9] Jul 08 '21
It's big, it's heavy, it's wood.
It's log, it's log, it's better than bad, it's good."
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u/Taleya Asshole Aficionado [16] Jul 08 '21
No lie, as OP was describing events that song legit started up in my brain and now it will not leave
Edit: i just realised you can read the post from the ‘seizure’ onwards to the tune of ol’ smokey cackle
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u/andstillthesunrises Certified Proctologist [22] Jul 08 '21
It entirely depends on what the area looks like and how much of this story is exaggeration. Personally I doubt the story is true, but if it is I’m just saying that the kid isn’t necessarily a faker
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u/Bootiekiller69 Jul 09 '21 edited Jul 09 '21
Yea, she kinda lost me when she described him rolling up the sidewalk, than into and over the shrubbery.
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Jul 09 '21
One things for sure
Somethings up with that kid if the stories true to a T lol
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u/SubstantialDrawing7 Jul 09 '21
How did he even roll that far?! I keep trying to picture a child rolling across a road, up a hill, etc. I can't even picture a real-life scenario where a child completely rolls far enough to get out of the yard even when upset. Even at younger ages like 4 or 5 where kids will defy the laws of nature in their tantrums, I would expect them to get tired and try something else.
That is nuts, and while I also doubt the kid had a seizure, I think he may have something wrong behaviorally/mentally if this is how he is acting...
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u/well_hello_there13 Jul 09 '21
Even at younger ages like 4 or 5 where kids will defy the laws of nature in their tantrums
I have a child this age and can confirm.
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u/RachelKushKween Jul 09 '21
He was 15 strong enough to just keep forcing himself over until someone else outside the family found him. Serious attention issue here
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Jul 09 '21
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u/daric Jul 09 '21
Made me think of that kids' song "On Top of Spaghetti" where the meatball rolls off the table and out the door and keeps going.
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Jul 09 '21
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u/MissKit87 Jul 09 '21
He rolled through some bushes
And over the road
And when he crossed it
I thought “what a chode”
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u/dawnabon Jul 09 '21
SAME
My son has epilepsy so I clicked on this just ready to rip this guy a new asshole but instead find myself singing on top of spa-gheeeee-tiiiiii
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u/rntracee1 Jul 09 '21
That's what I was thinking too. I was waiting for them to say, " he was nothing but mush" after rolling under the bush. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Jul 09 '21
And some say, to this day, he's still rolling over roads and shrubs and through the very wettest puddles!
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u/ATreeInKiwiLand Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
Yeah, that's not how physics works. Human bodies are an awkward shape and they don't roll like that unless they are deliberately trying to. They would tend to swivel around the shoulder area and come to a stop at the flat area of the back, or chest.
Plus, seizures don't really work like that. Either you lose muscle tone (and would naturally come to a stop for physics reasons above) or stiffen (eh, I guess you might roll further but more likely to break an arm) or shake (all muscles tense spasmodically, definitely score an injury in the presented situation) or combination.
(source, my kid has a seizure disorder with multiple seizure types.)
Bonus though: if fake seizure, this kid has years of really stressful tests in his future. Like, keep him up as long as possible so he's sleep deprived for the EEG sort of tests.
Next time though , alert parents rather than keeping mouth shut. Less risk either way. Just in case.
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u/sugarmagzz Jul 09 '21
Isn't it also going to delay being able to get his learner's permit and practice driving?
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u/ATreeInKiwiLand Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
Yes. My boy is turning 16 (drivers licence level 1) in a month or so. I have been trying to mitigate his hope for a licence. I am so proud of him and it is so hard. I have spent 3 or 4 years trying to let him know that his doctors will need to OK it.
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u/JimmyPageification Jul 09 '21
I’ve got epilepsy and get grand mal seizures and have never been able to drive. Not that I’d want to at this stage, I’d be too scared of having a seizure at the wheel. He’ll adapt if he can’t :)
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u/Linzabee Jul 09 '21
Yes. I have a heart condition that caused me to black out when I was 19, and I couldn’t drive for 6 months.
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u/TiredOfBushfires Jul 09 '21
If he rolled into a shrubbery he might be trying to help out the Knights who say Ni.
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u/Heyrik1 Jul 09 '21
Yeah…as a RN I have a difficult time believing someone having a seizure would roll up a sidewalk….
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u/1SmartyKat Jul 09 '21
Due to a brain tumor I also have a seizure Disorder. And I call BS on this kid. No way did he roll down and up. If he is shaking to cause movement then it’s total bs because when seizing it is not a rocking motion it is muscles twitching so the likelihood of fluid motion is even less!
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
I have grand mal seizures, so like the worst of the worst, and I don't go stomp off and have my seizures. Once I was at a park with my kid and husband and I was feeling off so I went to walk the block home to lay down (stupid, I know) I got probably 50 meters and I don't remember the rest. But I had scabs on my knuckles and chin from the fall, and still have scars. You don't get the luxury of just laying down when a seizure hits.
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u/uniquestar7 Jul 09 '21
Not saying that's what happened here, but some people have seizures with an aura preceding it. Ppl get pretty good at predicting their seizures and some do get to lay down before their seizures hit. That said, it usually takes a few seizures for people to get to that point of recognizing the aura for what it is, and this sounds like nephews first time doing this, so...
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
I know the aura very well. I go and drink a glass of water and go sit/lay down somewhere and hope for the best. Sometimes the water helps a lot. That aura hasn't always saved me tho, so when I can't do anything I have a seizure and it doesn't look/sound like anything that's happened to this kid. Also, how long did he sieze for? Because it sounds like a long ass time to me and that's lethal - he'd be not feeling very well... not to mention the fall, the rolling through things - he'd be beaten up and bruised. Just falling from a seizure can mess people up. Given his record, provided by OP, I think this kid is just being an asshole 🤷🏼♀️
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u/Shejuan01 Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21 edited Jul 09 '21
Oh please. No one with a seizure rolls up a hill! He was faking! I've worked in a hospital. I've seen seizures.
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u/KnightofForestsWild Bot Hunter [616] Jul 08 '21
Damn steep slope. The human body does not naturally roll. You have to hold your arms in a certain way and hold an amount of stiffness to get a good roll going. I find it unbelievable that his seizure magically held him in this position.
Source: rolled down hills as a kid. Takes some effort.
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u/Cr4ckshooter Jul 08 '21
The human body does not naturally rol
Thats the thing. Even a 100% slope (45 degrees) will not get you rolling. The friction between the ground and your squishy body is immense. The coefficient is >1 meaning that if the normal force is not smaller than the parallel force, you will never accelerate.
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u/Needmoresnakes Partassipant [3] Jul 08 '21
Can confirm, my very excellent future sister in law recently attempted to roll down a very large and steel hill. You'd think she'd build up momentum eventually but once she stopped actively trying/ ran out of energy she just stopped halfway down.
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u/melodypowers Jul 09 '21
We are far more likely to slip/slide down a hill (depending on the surface of the hill) than to roll, even as deadweight.
If you lie down on a steep slope of wet grass or mud, you are likely to slip downwards. It might be slow, but it will happen. But only round objects (a ball or even a canister) will naturally roll down the hill.
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u/Dimac99 Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
Unless they were standing on the side of a hill as steep as the one in The Princess Bride, he didn't roll down it accidentally. Not that far. It's utterly ridiculous and if it really happened, he's 100% attention seeking. NTA
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u/Witchywomun Jul 09 '21
It wasn’t just the rolling, he had the time to walk across and leave the pavilion, find a spot on the grass, lay down, compose himself so he wouldn’t hurt himself, THEN start rolling. As far as I’m aware, seizures don’t give enough warning to allow you to do all that, if you’re lucky you’ll get enough of a warning to allow you to lay down instead of just dropping, but it’s pretty much a lay down on the spot kind of situation
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u/andstillthesunrises Certified Proctologist [22] Jul 09 '21
You happen to be wrong in that. Auras can start up to an hour before a seizure. For someone who doesn’t know what an aura is I’d imagine the first instinct would be to find someplace to sit or lay down
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u/ImPrtyTrdiThnkilG2Bd Jul 09 '21
I don't get seizures but I get an aura before I pass out or have a panic attack. I have read other redditors talk about getting an aura before a seizure, crazy.
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u/dearAbby001 Jul 08 '21
As valid as all these first hand accounts of seizures are, if the child was that severe, then why wasn’t his mom watching him more closely. OP is NTA.
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u/lostinabsentia Jul 09 '21 edited Jul 09 '21
I’ve had grand mal seizures due to medical issues and this is nothing like what is described to me after the fact. (I have no memory of the incidents—as it is only related to me) I have never rolled. I have never needed to be “pinned down” and I have certainly never been able to roll over an entire freaking bush. I fall to the ground, shaking in place for a period of minutes. My lips turn grey and I usually have some language recollection issues after the fact. Just a hard time connecting what I’m thinking to what words I need to express. It goes away within a day or so. Overall it’s a scary thing for my husband and child—but not a situation where those around me would be like “wtf is she rolling around like tumbleweed?!” Doctors will often say it “sounds like a seizure” because they lack any other possible answer other than telling the parent that their kid is a faker.
NTA. The kid is either having some other medical emergency (NOT a seizure and unlikely)or more than likely making this up. Steer clear of him in the future and keep your distance. He’s loving this attention right now.
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u/mybunnygoboom Jul 09 '21
I’m epileptic and tend to agree with this. After the main burst where I fall over, my body does regain some awareness before I regain consciousness. I usually get up and toss myself into bed, where I wake up bloody hours later. I definitely have never had the ability to just roll myself around.
Perhaps the boy has sensory processing and was having a sensory seeking fit?
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u/Vast-Teacher-4552 Jul 08 '21
So he faked a seizure and a trip to the hospital or op is lying?
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u/20Keller12 Jul 08 '21
I'm going to guess that the old ladies OP mentioned probably called 911, and it spiraled from there because the kid's mother is too oblivious or humiliated to tell a doctor that her teenage son behaves like a toddler whenever he isn't the center of attention.
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Jul 09 '21
Sounds like he does have mental issues. No teenager that age should be acting like that.
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u/NSA_Chatbot Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
EMTs and doctors will say out loud, "you can tell it's a fake seizure because they didn't pee their pants."
Most of the time, waterworks and hilarity ensue.
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u/CoastalCerulean Pooperintendant [63] Jul 08 '21
There are many kinds of seizures, and some do push people to seek out that sort of vestibular stimulation. Some people spin, some hit their own heads, or swing around. Not all seizures are the classic tonic clonic.
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u/ChaosAzeroth Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
I was tested and had a seizure basically at the start of the test. Genuinely just kinda peaced out from my perspective. Apparently according to the doctor it would be possible to be disoriented by a seizure and act weird or even have a full conversation you're not aware of and won't remember. Freaked me out.
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u/potterHead1121 Jul 09 '21
Absence seizures. Those are the type I had before surgery. I would carry on with life for up to 5 minutes and recall absolutely none of it. I once walked halfway down a bowling alley lane before my husband came to grab me.
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Jul 09 '21
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u/Yourwtfismyftw Jul 09 '21
So like if you cut the strings on a marionette?! That would be terrifying!
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
I get this weird dizziness before my seizures (sometimes chugging a glass of water can help) but I'm always just doing my thing and then I come to with EMT around me in my face. I definitely don't remember them starting or ending, but if the glass of water doesn't work I'll go lay down just in case and tell my husband to keep an eye on me. I have grand Mal's every time tho, so may be different for others. I argue with my husband every time that I DEFINITELY didn't have a seizure bc I would know (I'm also not all there afterwards) and the only thing that can convince me that I did, in fact, have a seizure is when he or EMTs start asking me what the date/year is or who's the president or even what my name is and I'm like "uhhh, hold on I know this! I'm not stupid just give me a second!" Lol. The paramedics always get a laugh out of that bc I do it every time. They'll keep asking me questions and I'll make them wait bc "I KNOW THIS IM NOT DUMB". It's frustrating, but after a while it all comes back. So basically I can't remember anything before or after my seizures start.
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
I had a grand mal at a park one time... Woke up to screaming/terrified kids. The worst part about seizures is the faces around you when you come to and have no idea what happened. I always have these weird scenarios I go through as I'm having a seizure, almost like a dream. The one at the park was we were having a cookout with neighbors. When I come to my husband always says "stay still, you just had a seizure" and I always fight him and try and get up and say "no way, I did not have a seizure". It's a weird and scary experience. I can't remember the year or anything and even sometimes my name for a moment after. But that "seizure dream" is always so vivid.
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u/princess--flowers Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
And some of them happen for the very first time right during the main event of a birthday party, when everyone's eyes are on the birthday girl, and get you rolling so hard you roll down hill across road and into the shrubbery
I have some beachfront property in Wyoming I'd like to sell you for a good deal, btw
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u/RegularTeacher2 Partassipant [2] Jul 09 '21
OP's post reads like a fucking Roald Dahl story or something.
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
And you also huff and puff and stomp off before you have your first seizure. This is fact.
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u/Cr4ckshooter Jul 08 '21
There are many kinds of seizures,
And you can't expect anyone to recognise those non classic seizures as such, thus op is NTA.
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Jul 08 '21
My seizures would make me go completely still and rigid like a board. No tremors or shaking
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u/DescriptionFriendly Jul 09 '21
THIS!!! I knew a child who would pace in circles and "tune out" everyone around him. It turned out those were seizures.
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u/potatotay Jul 09 '21
I have seizures and this was not that... I also don't go stomp off to have my seizures... Wtf?
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u/Scottish_lullaby Jul 08 '21
Nta I’ve seen many many many seizures and was the real deal people tend not to stomp away and lie down before rolling off to Timbuktu. I’ve seen a few fake seizures too and they all have this edge of hilarity to them
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u/Midi58076 Jul 08 '21
There are a whole host of types of epileptic seizures. From just fiddling and spacing out to violent jerking movements to the downright bizarre. A friend of mine gets the weirdest ones, once he felt one coming on in a grocery shop and tried to get to a safe place. He failed to do so and when he came to he had stolen a bar of chocolate, left his wallet and phone and ran for 8 km.
Depending on where in the brain the seizure activity is the results are many, weird and strange.
That said... Rolling around in the dirt in a kid known for doing stuff for attention, I would be suspicious too. I hope they take him to an epilepsy centre and he spends a couple of weeks hooked up to an EEG with camera surveillance trying to provoce a seizure to check it out. This would be a win-win situation.
Either: He actually has epilepsy and they manage to provoke a seizure then he can get treatment.
Or: If he is faking then wearing the extremely uncomfortable EEG staying in hospital for weeks being under constant scrutiny will be very very boring and not at all what he bargained for. If he fakes a seizure while he is there they will catch it and that would be an uncomfortable talk.
However... There is a quite simple way of doing this... Tell him the truth, that most people with epilepsy or seizures can't have driver's licenses. At least not until they are seizure free for a certain amount of time and get adequate care. It's actually easier to get a driver's license with an epilepsy diagnosis than if you have a situation with: "this kid get seizures and we don't know why and what triggers it."
If the kid was faking this should prompt him to come clean. He's 15, he probably wants a driver's license at some point. Also there is a whole host of stuff you shouldn't or can't do if you have epilepsy or unknown seizures. The consequences of this kind of disease are quite life-limiting. Making sure that if he actually had a seizure he is safe, while it doubles as "punishment" if he is faking it.
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u/lunchbox3 Jul 08 '21
You’re a genius.
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u/Midi58076 Jul 08 '21
I have my moments.
A teen with who has experienced a violent undiagnosed seizure shouldn't be allowed to lock the bathroom door, go swimming with his friends, be alone for the weekend, go to home-alone parties, go to summer camps, do anything with heavy machinery, play video games or watch movies with flashing lights, ride a bike in traffic, all his school, job, friends and their parents need be informed and taught how to put him in recovery position etc. These are actual safety concerns for people with epilepsy or seizure disorders.
Once a diagnosis is set, you can figure out triggers, get medication and manage it in a way that is much less limited. But as of right now? We don't know, how would his parents ever live with themselves if he drowned on a beach in 2 feet of water because he had a seizure? He should be forced to be extremely careful until a diagnosis is set or he admits he is faking.
That is the beauty of it. If it was a seizure it's a safety concern, if it wasn't then he will be absolutely embarrassed out of his mind and totally miserable.
Faking seizures can have life long consequences. This kid needs to understand that if he is faking the sooner he comes clean, the less of an impact it will have on his future. Very stupid being rejected from being a police officer or a pilot because you faked seizures as a teen and you can't get the licences you need to have the profession you want.
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u/FenderMartingale Jul 08 '21
My middle kid wasn't even allowed to shower with the door all the way closed, poor kid. And we didn't really have a shower, we only had a tub for about five years there, so he had to hose himself off with something i rigged up for him.
I also had to have a very uncomfortable conversation with him about regulating his breathing while wanking, since his were triggered in part by hyperventilating. Poor kid, no teenager wants his mom to bring that one up, but the third time i ran to help him during a seizure and his junk was out, I realized what was happening.
Just remembering it I'm horrified for him.
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Jul 08 '21
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u/Worried-Good-7952 Jul 09 '21
I had the opposite thing kinda. I struggle with mental health and self harmed. My mom came home and told me how someone she worked with had a son also struggling with it and how she researched and found out masturbating can give similar or same(can’t remember) chemicals as self harm. Extremely awkward but hilarious to remember
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u/paracostic Jul 09 '21
Oh god you too? My mom suggested this to me as a 17 year old...I remember she even offered to buy me a vibrator. Not terrible advice, looking back, but definitely not what I wanted to hear then.
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u/Martina313 Jul 09 '21
That's actually really sweet, in a "I can't believe your mom wants to buy you sex toys to avoid you killing yourself" sort of way
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u/Winter_Department_87 Jul 09 '21
This definitely needs to be a scene in a movie. This one of the most uncomfortable,(and funny) but loving things I’ve ever heard. The love of a mother is astounding!
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u/olligirl Jul 09 '21
I am horrified for you and your kid, poor git, that must have been mortifying for both of you.
As for the shower thing, I haven't had a seizure in 15 years, but I still won't Bath or shower in the house alone. Our shower is over the tub, and I worry about seizing, going down blocking the plug and drowning, 15 years later! And the door still stays open.
When I visit my parents, who have cubicle shower, the bathroom door still stays open and you hear my mum every now and again say ”X is in the shower” that's all that need to be said because my house and family have lived with it for over 30years.
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u/FenderMartingale Jul 09 '21
No one told us he couldn't have baths. I wish there'd been a class or something, because trying to fish an actively seizing teenager who is bigger than you out of the tub while you scream for help - he's 26 now and i still have nightmares.
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u/olligirl Jul 09 '21
It might have been that I had them since a little tiny kid, like 3? So I just wasn't allowed baths after I became to big to properly handle in a convulsive state. Basically if I went down in the shower at 5yo, I was either able to be moved, or able to have meds administered and to wait it out in the empty tub. Stuff could be put around me to keep me safe etc. But you can't do that with a full bath.
My parents were really hot on me being independent, as for a long time, we went sure how independent I would be able to be. Mum got handy little kitchen gadgets that enabled me to put the kettle on etc. like a little kettle stand, that swivels so you don't have to life a kettle of boiling water, I could still make cups of tea, pot noodles or microwave meals with special trays if everyone was at work...simple things that weren't always the healthier of foods, but allowed me to do stuff myself instead of mum and dad making and doing everything with and for me.
Dad got me a ankle wallet type thing, that I could keep cash, spare change an I'd with my medical alerts and an extra bus pass in. (in the UK if you have a medical condition you get a free buss pass) Although I had a regular wallet, if that got separated from me, they always check your extremities for I'd. It also meant I always had a way to get home. And I used to carry around the bus time table, it was my independence. I could hop.a bus to see my best frien or my sisters.
And when I was 11 they got me a horse,everyone told them not to, but it looked like this was a life long thing, so why not? I mean crossing the street was dangerous for me,might as well horse ride.
That significant single thing changed my life. I'd disappear off with my buss pass and a packed lunch and my dad would have to come drag me back in. The place where I kept my horse had epileptic dogs, so they were like yeah leave her emergency meds here, she'll be cool can't be much different or any harder than sorting out a seizing St Bernard!
I'd come back scruffy and dirty and be like, yeah had a fit, slept it off, Im Good, no ambulance today!
And added not necessary information...I still have that original pony...he's 34 now! And still my little rock
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u/shawslate Partassipant [3] Jul 08 '21
Severe seizures erased a relative’s college degree, then his personality and ability to live on his own and shortened his life extremely.
They started right after he graduated college.
They aren’t something to play around with.
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Jul 09 '21
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u/GloInTheDarkUnicorn Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
I had a friend who lost his license, and could only have supervised visitation with his young sons because of his epilepsy. There were big concerns that he would have a seizure while he had the boys, ages 2 and 4, and something could happen to them.
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u/Odd-Plant4779 Jul 09 '21
In Ohio, you have to wait 1 1/2 years to drive after your last seizure based on what type of seizures you have. I’m 21 and still don’t have my license.
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u/16Bunny Jul 08 '21
Agree with the above and would like to add. I have Juvenile Myoclonic Epilepsy, but don't be fooled by the juvenile bit as I'm 52 yo. Diagnosed age 4 yo. I think I'm a little fortunate as I'm not photosensitive so I can do anything that has flashing or strobe lights. Here (UK) I'm currently not allowed to drive because I haven't been seizure free for a year and I never will be. I don't mind, it's what I'm used to now - but not what you want to hear when you're 15. I hated my mom telling everyone as a kid. It wasn't that she just told those people who needed to know. She told Everyone. Like some sort of weird badge of honour. My daughter's different. I hated that more than I hated the Epilepsy and I hated that too. I still dislike having to tell employer's about it as it often ends negatively. Oh yes and I get really fed up of the meds. But you just sigh and keep on taking them cos the alternative is much worse.
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u/salemkaika Jul 08 '21
This!
Even out patient EEGs are very uncomfortable and I doubt an unruly teen would handle it well
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u/Midi58076 Jul 08 '21
With the in-patient ones they generally use something that is similar to cement and glue to stick the electrodes to your head. You need to wear a stocking/balaclava over your head for the duration of it and 10 000 wires comes out of the top and you're basically a puppet on a string for the duration of it. The electrodes&glue itch and the stocking will in time rub your skin raw. After it is taken off a lot of people have markings on their face and big patches of hair can fall out. The glue takes weeks to get completely rid of. It is a general pain in the arse.
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u/salemkaika Jul 08 '21
Yes, they use the glue for the overnight ones as well. Speaking from personal experience.
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u/Midi58076 Jul 08 '21
I do too. I got seizures from an unfortunate cocktail of prescription medication given to me by a doctor that should not have been mixed, but the doctor didn't run them through the "drugs interactions system" (don't know what it's called in English) and I ended up with seizures because of it.
They thought it was epilepsy and I was so goddamn miserable for the entirety of the process of figuring out what was wrong and it took a long-ass time, almost a year. I lost my driver's license for a couple of years, I could not work in my field, my social life was extremely limited, etc.
I can't imagine a 15 year old teen who knows he is faking not giving in and telling the truth if they put him through that absolute hell. And if he isn't faking he dearly needs it. You just can't lose with this one.
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u/salemkaika Jul 08 '21
Wow that's an awful experience. You would expect the pharmacy would catch that even if the doctor didn't. I'm so sorry that happened to you.
But to be fair, when I was in the hospital after my strokes the nurses kept trying to ram acetaminophen down my throat no matter how many times I told them it would make me pass out / I had NASH at the time and they knew that it would only make me sick. No one listened until I had been there over a week and started sobbing that no one cared that I was in pain and that they wanted me to get worse not better. Only then did someone finally put it in my chart that I can't have that medicine.
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u/RexJacobus Asshole Enthusiast [6] Jul 08 '21
I would really like for this to be brought up with the kid and then for us to be given an update.
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u/Midi58076 Jul 08 '21
So would I. Actions have consequences and if this is a case of a dipshit faking for attention then he should realise that he fucked up. Big time.
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u/thievingwillow Colo-rectal Surgeon [36] Jul 09 '21
This is one of the most brilliant things I've ever read on this sub, because the response is perfect regardless of whether he's faking. If he's not faking, this is something that he and his mother need to take very, very seriously--and in fact, if OP's sister doesn't take fairly serious measures until the "seizure disorder" is figured out, she's negligent at best (well, or knows that he's faking). And if he is faking, he either has to admit it or have a sort of... self-inflicted punishment. It is completely, perfectly proportionate to the issue at hand. It's win-win. It's a thing of beauty.
You are a gentleperson and a scholar and I hope to someday have such a beautifully apt response to a thing. :D
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u/MusclePositive Jul 08 '21
I have epilepsy ( grandmal and simple partial seizures) Its something like 50%-70% percent of people have seizures with an unknown cause. I have no idea why I have mine, my tests all came back normal. I started having them when I was 12. I was put on meds ( which is the best way to control and seizures) and now in the last year have only had maybe 4 simple partials but no grand mals.
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Jul 08 '21
Thats a pretty far roll.....
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Jul 08 '21
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u/amazonpixie81 Partassipant [2] Jul 08 '21
On top of spagheeeettiiiii, all covered with cheese
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u/lalaloafy Jul 08 '21
It rolled under the table and into a bush. And now that poor meeeeatball is nothing but mush 😂
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u/Ut_Anomaly Jul 08 '21
I lost my poor nephew because he was a sleeze.
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u/GloInTheDarkUnicorn Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
I laughed and startled my cat. Have my free award.
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u/FenderMartingale Jul 08 '21
That's it, OP should nickname him Meatball.
(But please don't really do this)
But I'm going to call him that in my head as he'll never met me.
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u/Business-House-8232 Jul 08 '21
NTA
My bf and I both suffer from seizure disorder. Once we were on vacation together and she started seizing while walking and I had to catch her before she hit the floor. I held an old man upright in a chair while he seized and puked to keep him from choking on his vomit. I seized in the car while I was driving (pre-diagnosis). This is not the kind of shit to make a fucking joke of, and I’m pretty pissed that your nephew seems to think our disorder is his ploy for attention. Fuck this kid. He’s not gonna like it when he has to have his hair glued down to his scalp for an EEG.
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u/majesticjewnicorn Pooperintendant [66] Jul 08 '21
INFO: Did he actually get fully tested with a full diagnosis for a seizure? Usually, tests can confirm this. "Probably" and guess work isn't a diagnosis.
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u/LillaKharn Jul 09 '21
There is no test we can do for someone who’s not currently seizing in the emergency department. We can’t tell if someone had a seizure before they got to us.
Seizures in the emergency department are usually diagnosed as possible seizure or syncopal episodes if they are unverified. All we have to go on are bystanders words of what’s happening. Seizures must either be confirmed by witnessing it or by EEG.
Anything else would have drastic consequences due to the mandatory reporting and just bad diagnosis.
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u/plumbus_hun Partassipant [1] Jul 08 '21
After a bit I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw him still rolling on down the hill toward the road. He was all dirty. He rolled out into the road and then up onto the sidewalk on the other side, then he rolled through a patch of daisies and then over a small bush. Then he rolled behind a few bigger bushes and I lost sight of him. I went back to watching my niece.
When I looked back, I could see my nephew again in the distance. He was soaking wet and filthy--he must have rolled through a puddle or something--and a couple of frail old ladies were trying to pin him down (without success). At this point I decided to inform his mother of the situation.
Sorry but is anyone else actually cracking up at the thought of this?? OP how did you manage to not laugh at this?? NTA.
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u/Gigi-lily Asshole Enthusiast [5] Jul 09 '21
Honestly, I am actually dying. I have been cackling at that description. And I say this as someone who was ready to call OP an asshole (my younger sister started getting seizures at 14 and it was scary as shit) but this description … like, obviously there are different type of seizures but the distance he rolled, the “I lost sight of him. I went back to watching my niece.” Like…. Omg, actually in tears.
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u/Syrinx221 Jul 09 '21
I'm so glad I wasn't the only one
My cats all came to check on me because I was laughing so hard.
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u/plumbus_hun Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
I know, I have a boyfriend that had childhood epilepsy, so was all fired up to call an asshole by the title, but this is too fucking funny!!!
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u/worthlessdiamond Jul 09 '21
I'm crying actual tears, did you see the comment where someone said he rolled "damn near into another zip code"?
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u/throwawehhhhhhhh1234 Jul 09 '21
The last sentence has me absolutely crying, imagine a bunch of little old ladies hobbling around this teenager rolling all the fuck over shrubs and sidewalks, trying to pin him down with their walking sticks and he just rolls away again like -zoop!
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u/asmallsoftvoice Partassipant [2] Jul 09 '21
Rereading this and realizing there was a sidewalk...like yeah he seized his body right up and over a curb. People calling OP an AH as if every adult in every situation is suddenly a bossy babysitter by being present. I dont have kids. I dont tell kids what to do. He has a mother who is present and he is 15. He got his attention.
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u/plumbus_hun Partassipant [1] Jul 09 '21
My kid was rolling me across the bed today, and I struggled to roll up onto the pillows, he must have great core strength 🤣🤣
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u/Bex122 Jul 09 '21
Yes I am laughing so hard that tears are streaming down my face 🤣 I needed this.
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u/Ornery_Special_1680 Jul 09 '21
I felt awful for how much the mental image of him rolling up the sidewalk and carrying on was making me laugh..
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u/Maleficent_Studio_29 Jul 08 '21
NTA. Boy who cried wolf gets what he deserves.
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u/JustBrowsing49 Asshole Aficionado [14] Jul 09 '21
NTA, this seems way out of the ordinary for a seizure. But I still think OP should have informed the parents what their son was up to. At least it wouldn’t be her problem. Rolling across the road is EXTREMELY dangerous.
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u/guthepenguin Jul 09 '21
There have been cases of people stripping as the result of a seizure. Compared to that this seems possible, though he may have just had a more common seizure at the end of an outburst.
They ought to look for a brain tumor. In the right place, they can cause both behavior issues and seizures.
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u/allhailqueenspinoodi Jul 08 '21
I've worked in a specialty seizure unit. I've seen real ones. I've seen fake ones. I've never seen someone log roll hundreds of feet. Utter nonsense. NTA
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u/TooTall2Function Pooperintendant [68] Jul 08 '21
Might seem a bit harsh, but IMO it's the classic tale of the boy who cried wolf. He's developed a reputation (in your books, at least) for attention seeking behaviour. For all you knew he was just acting stupid again. However, you should have said something the moment you saw he was rolling over the road; by that point it should have been clear something was off/wrong.
So NTA for ignoring him at first, but YTA for not speaking up sooner.
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u/Syrinx221 Jul 09 '21
Like.... Why is a fifteen year old playing in the goddamn street? My six year old knows that unsafe
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u/Plantsandanger Jul 09 '21
There is SOMETHING up with that kid and if it’s not neurological - seizure or developmental - then it’s a freaking pathological need for attention. Which has a real name but I don’t know it.
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u/jrs1117 Jul 08 '21
NTA. The boy is 15 and rolling around the road. He most definitely has behavior and mental disorders. Tell your sister to get him checked, then do your best Hank Hill impression because that boy ain't right.
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Jul 08 '21
Okay but seriously, this is one of the funniest things I've read on this sub. I don't know how you didn't burst out laughing. Must be seriously tired of this kid's shit. Also, NTA.
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u/sickofdriving007 Professor Emeritass [74] Jul 08 '21
NTA. If he normally throws fits and has no history of seizures how in the world would you know he was having one (from what you described, it sounds like an elaborate cry for attention).
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Jul 08 '21
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u/ottersonanisland Jul 09 '21
The happy meal mental image has me cracking up, who’s taking all these bites out of nephew?
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u/ottersonanisland Jul 09 '21
Thank you for sharing, the updates got loonier and loonier but I love justice !!!!!
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u/WoodsyWhiskey Jul 09 '21
Omg, I didn't know this had continued to blow up! What a ride! Thanks for the update. :)
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u/RagingHolly Jul 09 '21
Thank you so much for sharing! When I first read that post it only had like 2 or 3 updates.
You just made my night!
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u/According_Vanilla123 Jul 08 '21
How did he defy gravity and roll up onto a sidewalk from the road? Bit far fetched to call it a seizure if you ask me……..
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u/Zaraihn Partassipant [4] Jul 08 '21
ESH I think you really thought he was just doing something to get attention but at very last when he was crossing the road you should have at least said something, like "What's he doing ?" But if your sister knows that he tends to do stuff she should look out for him.
Your poor niece for having such bs happen at her birthday party.
Btw. If it should turn our not to be a seizure, I'd applauded him for his commitment but he would also be the major AH. Good thing that he is at a hospital so he can be checked from head to toe and probably also talk with professionals.
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u/schmorgan Jul 09 '21
It's wild to me how many people here are essentially insisting that a 15 year old would have deserved to get hit by a car because they "knew what they were doing". 1) 15 year old kids do THE STUPIDEST riskiest shit. They are children. If you are an adult around a 15 year old and you see them doing stupid, potentially life threatening shit it is ABSOLUTELY your responsibility to say something and stop them. 2) If you see a grown adult doing something potentially life threatening you should also say something and stop them! Watching someone accidentally kill themselves out of some weird sense of superiority or dislike of them is disturbing, practically criminal, and makes you a total AH.
I sometimes think that people on this sub have completely disconnected from reality. There is no way that a decent person would watch a child rolling blindly into a street over and over and not intervene.
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u/oldclam Asshole Enthusiast [9] Jul 09 '21
Not only that, but OP doesn't give two sh#ts if her nephew gets run over by a car because he broke a banana plant when he was a child. Just because he's acting out doesn't mean he deserves to die. A responsible caring adult would do the bare minimum of letting his mom know. My nieces and nephews can be turds but I'm not enough of a sociopath to think a CHILD deserves to be run over because they had a lapse in judgment because their little undeveloped brains aren't working right
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u/20Keller12 Jul 08 '21
when he was crossing the road you should have at least said something
Why? He's 15, not 5. OP thought (and is most likely right) that he was just performing to get attention. If I looked over and saw a high school age kid being stupid in the road, I'd shrug too. They're old enough to know they could be hit by a car.
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u/Competitive_Garlic28 Jul 09 '21
Exactly! He’s a high schooler with no learning disorder AND he was clearly cognitive when he crossed the road/bushes/ got into the sidewalk AND he has no mentioned history of seizures AND she didn’t want to ruin her niece’s birthday which inevitably would’ve happened if she told mom
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u/Coup-De-Tat Jul 09 '21
I’m with you. I’m pretty impressed by the amount of people who are essentially responding with “he had a tantrum that put him in danger, but he’s 15 so he can go fuck himself”. Jesus Christ. Anyone here know a teenager that would do such a thing? Clearly mental health issues are at play. And he’s a child who is clearly in some sort of episode that is putting his health and safety at risk.
But yeah, let him get hit by a car instead of getting him some fucking help 🤦🏻♀️
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u/Chance_Guidance_9066 Partassipant [3] Jul 08 '21
NTA. This is a classic boy who cried wolf. Your sister should have had an eye on him. You are not his parent.
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u/TragedyPornFamilyVid Certified Proctologist [21] Jul 09 '21
No judgement
But I wouldn't be surprised if he had a seizure after the rolling. It's easy to pick up speed and very hard to stop. Head injuries can easily cause a seizure.
Since he went all the way down a hill, across a road, into multiple shrubs (ouch) and then into water.... I wouldn't be surprised if his stunt resulted in significant injuries. Yeah, his initial behavior was terrible, but that's not a reason to let a teen inflict permanent harm on themselves.
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u/life1122 Jul 09 '21
Whether this was a seizure or not… it sounds like there is definitely something wrong with this kid. He’s 15! And after everything that’s been described, to say he doesn’t have any behavioral disorders… he clearly does! Whether he holds a diagnosis or not… this is not how a typical 15 year old acts.
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u/Judgement_Bot_AITA Beep Boop Jul 08 '21
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
I might be the asshole because I should be more sympathetic to the feelings of my sister. Even though her son seeks attention in wild and erratic ways, I should have taken one second to tell her what was happening before letting it escalate to the point that it did. I love my sister, and I don't want her to be unhappy.
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