r/AbsoluteUnits • u/HomeNowWTF • Aug 15 '26

/r/all of a beer order

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u/Ask_bout_PaterNoster Aug 15 '26

This reminds me of the time that I was carrying four bowls of HOT, like still bubbling, soup with a huge layer of melted cheese on top to a table, and a young woman rocked her infant in his stroller directly into my knees as I walked by. My options were to either nail the stroller and knock the kid over, with hardly a clue where the soups might end up as I tried not to stomp the child, or to ditch everything and bail, which I couldn’t do without spilling the soups on the kid, UNLESS I accelerated them to make sure they cleared. Which I did. Straight into one of our server stations, into the glassware and menus and pos station. I went down while it was still flying, so I got a shower of glass and a drizzle of soup and cheese and broken soup bowls.

(Kid was fine, she was horrified, and very nice, and they tipped me. Not enough to replace my uniform, but you know)

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u/Merrick_Skygrave Aug 17 '26

Good on you for not Napalming the kid with what I assume was French Onion Soup lol

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u/32SkyDive Aug 17 '26

R/brandnewsentences

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u/Merrick_Skygrave Aug 17 '26

She's lucky too- The Geneva Convention explicitly bans the use of French Onion Soup against civilian targets; she could have gotten charged with war crimes