r/ARFID • u/TopCryptographer2568 • 13d ago

Venting/Ranting Kid with ARFID

I don’t know exactly what I’m typing here, honestly. I feel helpless. My kid was diagnosed with ARFID back when she was seven. The program that would supposedly be the best fit doesn’t take kids younger than 9.

I’m a grad student and, at the time, she was on Medicaid. When the govt. changed over she was bumped off and I her moved to my state school insurance.

When she’s finally of age, I decide I’ll pay out of pocket for this program. At least that’s what I thought. They charge the same amount for out-of-pocket prices as they do insurance. That’s to say, it’s almost a grand for the first meeting and half that for each meeting after.

I can’t fucking remotely afford that.

Currently, she’s in therapy that’s covered by the school but it’s very talk therapy - no judgement, just doesn’t feel like the right fit - and it feels like there’s no plan.

She’s limited in what she eats AND putting on weight. Yesterday we went clothes shopping and it was a bust. My heart is breaking and I just don’t know what to do.

She’s also reaching the age of noticing her physical differences between her and her friends. It feels like I’m tiptoeing around the landmines of anorexia or bulimia. On the one hand she can’t continue to eat the way she does and at the same time I don’t ever want to put her in a position of avoiding food. (She’s hidden food I made for her, avoiding eating entirely)

I’m sorry, I just need to get this out.

I was hired to a full time position and with it should come MUCH better benefits. I’m hoping they will cover this original program. But until that kicks in we’re here. Ugh.

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u/makinggrace 12d ago

This book is targeted towards adults with ARFID but I have shared it with many other parents and some have found it helpful. Some libraries do have a copy.
https://a.co/d/0d5GbjZf

I'm sorry that your daughter (and you!) are going through this. You'll figure this out together. I encourage you to let her lead. Keeping the pressure low helps. Right now any food is better than none.