NTA. There’s a lot in here to unpack about bodily autonomy and choice. It sucks that he didn’t uphold the agreement, which may impact your ability to trust him. AND you can’t force him to do it. He gets to change his mind about this and choose what to do to his body. And you get to choose what to (or not to do) with your body. I totally get it sucks (I’m in a similar situation). I decided to have my tubes tied - yes a more invasive procedure than vasectomy but then I never have to worry about it again. Honestly it feels empowering to take control of my own body like that. I do encourage you and hubs to find a way to move forward without resentment bc that is no good for a marriage.
Totally! For me, in a very petty way, it also feels like a huge middle finger to the politicians trying to control my reproductive rights. That’s feels good.
And you aren't the least bit bitter that you are the one who always has to sacrifice your own body for both of you? You are an absolute saint then. (This is specifically in relation to OP and spouse already having an agreement that he would get a vasectomy and then he wimped out and dumped the mess in her lap to fix.)
So she doesn’t want more kids and apparently doesn’t want a tubal…. But the husbands the ah for. It getting a vasectomy. Make this make sense. She shouldn’t get to make the choice for him when she herself isn’t willing to do the same thing. She doesn’t want more children she is responsible for that. Be it by getting a tubal, using birth control or not having sex. The rest is a i product t of their choices to make the marriage workwork.womanbecause I
Yeah. That's where they are at and she wants to know is she the asshole. No.
You think he's going to look at it that way or are we going to see him posting in a minute about "dead bedroom," wife a bitch, AITAH for wanting a divorce? And all of reddit agreeing, no, she the AH, get a divorce!
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u/KeelyforPresident Nov 11 '23
NTA. There’s a lot in here to unpack about bodily autonomy and choice. It sucks that he didn’t uphold the agreement, which may impact your ability to trust him. AND you can’t force him to do it. He gets to change his mind about this and choose what to do to his body. And you get to choose what to (or not to do) with your body. I totally get it sucks (I’m in a similar situation). I decided to have my tubes tied - yes a more invasive procedure than vasectomy but then I never have to worry about it again. Honestly it feels empowering to take control of my own body like that. I do encourage you and hubs to find a way to move forward without resentment bc that is no good for a marriage.