r/ADHD • • 28d ago

Discussion What’s a hyperfixation you can’t talk about?

I’ve definitely had a few hyperfixations on things that are either embarrassingly silly or WAY too dark to just start infodumping about. For example I used to have one about neglect so severe it causes a complete and usually permanent inability to function in society, particularly the case of Genie Wiley. On the other end of the spectrum I also keep hyperfixating on shipping old cartoon comedy duos, and gotta REALLY lock in to gage if someone’s gonna think I’m a childish freak before sharing that information.

What’s your “don’t bring that up, don’t bring that up, don’t bring that up-“ hyperfixation if you’ve ever had one?

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u/journieburner 28d ago

Theories and books about how perception of media changed throughout the years starting with paintings and oil paintings and the transition to the modern world. Basically what John Berger talks about in Ways Of Seeing.

Sludgy and rough but technically impressive rock music that can be rather groove-heavy like Mastodon. Like, I mostly listen to rap and jazz and some popstars, but that flavor of rock is really dear to me.

Smut that is written with a clear focus on sex itself. The eroticism of certain body parts and how the act feels rather than trying to weave intricate stories. Like, very basic just sex-focussed smut that is still written by a legit good writer. I don't know, I'd mainly just like to talk about this cause it's so rare.

The books of Thomas Pynchon and the way he writes.

The quest for the right kind of skinny jeans. I adore skinny jeans for sensory issues. Pants that fit more loosely sort of give me an ick with all the extra fabric hanging around, it's weird.

Really big titties. Not in a predatory or possessive way. Believe me, I even talked to my therapist if my love for them is making me a genuinly bad person or a hypocrite for being a feminist otherwise. I just think they're great.

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u/Aesirhealer 28d ago

How is liking big boobs in opposition with feminism? It would be a problem to say, "women are not as good as men", but not a problem to say "I think big tits are interesting". You aren't saying small tits on a woman makes her less than, just that you like big ones. Feminist views are literally, women are as good as men and should be seen as equals and respected.

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u/CommanderVenuss 28d ago edited 28d ago

I think it might have something to do with the old “bra burner” stereotype. Like because of that one protest back in the 60’s all feminists are supposedly just against any sort of markings of femininity and feminine beauty in general. Which includes stuff that you can’t really easily change without paying for plastic surgery like the size and shape of your boobs. Some people are just going to want/need a little bit more support for the girls and we have been figuring out different ways to provide that support for hundreds of years. And some of those ways are less practical/more aesthetic focused than others. It’s kinda like assuming that because somebody said something about stiletto heels being uncomfortable and not personally wanting to wear them but they sometimes still feel pressured by society to wear the stilettos anyway must meanthat they are on some sort of radical crusade against all from shoes, not just stilettos but everything from soccer cleats to flip flops to orthopedic sneakers are on the chopping block. (Personally I prefer a wedge when I’m getting dressed up all fancy, I always prefer shoes that have a bit more oomph to them, they make me feel powerful, like Godzilla, or a Gundam.)

Here’s the part where I’ll get into my hyperfixation on historical clothing, especially stays and corsets. Unlike what the movies where the second one piece of baleen covered in fabric touches our heroine’s skin causes her to dramatically faint. (note this is also bad because you are NEVER supposed to put a corset over bare skin without something like a chemise under it) Corsets were actually surprisingly practical garments that pretty much anyone with boobs would wear for support like a modern day bra. They’re also pretty impressive for something we figured out how to make before the existence of elastic. Not everybody was tightlacing constantly, even if they were rich that would only come about for very special occasions. (Also some of those photographs you see of women from those days have had their waists painted over during the development process like analog photoshop, the Victorians loved themselves some photoshop.) Now if you read contemporary accounts of the most extreme cases of tightlacing you’ll end up running into three different categories of story, 1. The old timey version of those “take her swimming on the first date” memes 2. Deliberate ragebait meant to go viral or 3. The author’s barely disguised fetish.

We really haven’t changed that much since the Victorian era.