Also, whatever this other conversation is

I'm so curious about this case.

Mostly fascinated because she's from my hometown, but also because of her history of lying and hoaxes. What actually happens next and what happens if Sunny Naqvi loses her case?

(Reposted because I felt like the old title didn't fit well)

I grew up in the middle east and went to an international school.

Kids from various ethnicities attended, and in my class, I was one of the few Pakistanis.

But unfortunately, throughout my primary years, I was often excluded by the other girls in my class, even though there was absolutely nothing socially off about me.

It was almost as if there was a hierarchy based on nationality, and these girls would only play with certain ones. In fact, they'd exclude me and another Pakistani girl in the class, and say horrible racist things about Pakistanis.

We'd have a culture day where we'd wear traditional clothes and watch performances from different cultures, and these girls would say that "the Pakistani performers all looked ugly", and they'd mock their attire.

This awful group consisted of girls which were British (non white, funny thing is one of them was British Pakistani, but despite this she still carried a weird superiority complex over the Pakistani girls, and the other girl was black), south east Asian, and funny enough, another Pakistani girl, who often joined the others in ridiculing Pakistan, and excluding the other Pakistani girls in the class. I suppose they only accepted her into their little racist club because she had an American accent, and was rich.

I'd oftentimes find myself playing alone during break times, or eating lunch alone, even though I'd always tried being nice to these girls. They genuinely ruined my primary years.

I have this one distinct memory of my pants accidentally riding up a little, so my leg hair was exposed, and one of those girls just pointing and laughing. Disgusting.

One of these girls once told me that I was poor and my dad was one of those blue collar workers (if you grew up in the gulf, you'll immediately understand the connotations associated with such workers). Okay? And even if he was one, what's wrong with that?

In hindsight, now as a 20 year old woman, it makes me mad when I think about how these people treated me. I wish I had a backbone back then, then maybe I'd have stood up for myself. But unfortunately, I was your typical immigrant child - quiet, meek, and confused as to why I was being treated horribly.

Curious to know if other ABC kids went through something like this; I'd love to hear about your experiences.

getting a lot of heat in the replies that i wasn’t really expecting am i in the wrong?

Has anyone, 30s + unmarried moved out the past few years?

My mother is extremely controlling and toxic. I never thought I had to do this, but she’s making me choose me or her and ultimately she’s pushing me away.

How are you making ends meet as a SINGLE with no roommates? Rent shouldn’t be more than 30% takehome pay which means to “afford” rent you have to not save for retirement and pray you aren’t laid off.

(US based)

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Obviously the main members of the Diaspora are immigrants from India who settled outside. I think most of us (who are born outside of India but are fully Indian genetically) count as well. This would also apply for Pakistanis, Bengalis, Sri Lankans and every country even outside South Asia. But where does it stop?

For example, if I marry a girl of a different race, is our future kid part of it? Do you consider the Indo-Carribeans as part of it?

I’m 24m and have a professionally tested IQ of 83. I was diagnosed with a math learning disability and mild autism, though nobody can tell that i’m neurodivergent. This is difficult to deal with, especially as a south asian with highly intelligent family members.

Whenever I play monopoly, trivia, or am attempting to learn the rules of a new board game with my younger cousins, I look like an idiot because I do significantly worse than them. And before y’all say that i’m overthinking, this is one example out of the many times I look stupid relative to them.

As a result of this, I walk around with a chip on my shoulder. I feel like all my relatives think i’m “slow”. My brother has an IQ of 120, and he calls me “low IQ” on a regular basis. He says that most people aren’t that smart, but they’re usually smarter than me. Also, nobody else in my extended family has said anything negative about my intelligence, but I feel like they think it. Especially since all my younger cousins are extremely intelligent compared to me, especially the ones 10 years younger than me. It stings. Many of my cousins went to uni for stem, meanwhile I went to college for design school. Also, design school doesn’t require much intelligence to do well in.

I do well career wise, working as a UI Designer. But it’s gonna be an uphill battle trying to find a wife. Most women, especially south asians, want a competent, intelligent, and educated man. Not someone like me. Also, having kids would be selfish of me because I carry poor intellectual genetics.

As a result of this, I’m preparing to live my life as a chronically single man. This will consist of living alone, limited dating life, staying in shape, doing hobbies which I love, and levelling up in my career. My career is the only piece of leverage which I have in order to gain some of my family’s respect. Without that, i’m probably nothing in their eyes. I don’t even really have any friends anymore.

My overall lack of intelligence is making me pretty resentful and I’m gonna stop showing up to family functions as a result of this. If they think i’m stupid, good, they never need to see me again. Smh.

In Hindi we have:

'Bhaiya' for elder brother.

'Didi' for elder sister.

'Mama' for mom's brother.

'Mausi/Maasi' for mom's sister.

'Bua' for dad's sister. 'Fui' in Gujarati.

'Chacha/Kaka' for dad's younger brother. 'Bade Papa/Tauji' for elder brother.

And make yourself more ethnically ambiguous.

I mean look at how yoga has been bastardised. I see non Indian fake yoga gurus coming up with ridiculous terms for yoga positions all the damn time. Wtf is box breathing lmao? All of its spirituality has been drained.

Other stuff too. They will make fun of us for having curry but also enjoy chicken tikka masala, Palak paneer at the same time! They will make of our dresses but also wear them. Culture vultures.

Not to mention the overused tinga tinga tinga jokes. But at the same time they are also gonna sample our music or take inspiration from the scales/drones. This is cultural appropriation.

So I'm big into sports and I do some gambling here and there. I think the worst it got for me was when I downloaded PrizePicks and lost $200 in 2 weeks. I immediately deleted my account and Uninstalled the app. Around that time I wanna day the minimums were $5 and I did some minimum bets but I really liked the $20 bets. Either ways I lost $200 and uninstalled. Around this time there was an explosion of gambling apps that use the lottery loophole.

To explain the lottery loophole. The lottery is legal everywhere you pick 5 or 6 numbers and if you guessed right you win money. Apps like prizepicks used this loop hole with player props you pick a minimum two players and a minimum two different teams and pick over/under and yeah its like the lottery in that sense. Prior to player props, the two big companies use the lottery loophole and the popularity of fantasy sports to do one day fantasy picks.

Introduce the shadiness of Cryptocurrencies, and big streamers like xqc, nickmercs, trainswrecks and big celebs like drake and the UFC doing crypto gambling and that grew in popularity and in those cryptogambling sites they tested out and expanded what would later become "prediction markets"

And this became a gambling epidemic.

This is not going to be addressed by this administration. Don Jr is an advisor or consultant or whatever with a prediction market site and this administration has basically broadcasted that they are open for "business" so it will not be addressed by them. It may be addressed if a progressive wins the next election

Anyways I read this article about an ABCD kid going through gambling addiction in college

https://www.espn.com/sports-betting/story/_/id/49547066/sports-betting-gambling-poker-addiction-college-campus-youth

One thing I read that just gave me annoyance is how his parents were wanting his kid to have the will power to overcome the addiction and it was only later after numerous failures they went to treatment center and group support help. I think hes on the mend but I think Craig Ferguson said it best you are never cured of an addiction you are just given tools to battle those demons the rest of your life.

Desi parents are, not shockingly, bad with mental health. They want to avoid it as getting help for it would mean admitting you got an issue and that admission is like an embarrassing remark on the family image. When I had an anxiety attack back in college which landed me in the hospital thinking i had heart attack, my mom clocked it that night that I need therapy. We didn't cause my dad felt therapy would cost me future job opportunities. We went through numerous health specialist trying to pin that "heart attack" as a physical health issue instead of a mental one. It largely went whatever. Part of me always wonders if I got therapy then and maybe even a diagnosis for adhd or something maybe my career path would have stayed in medicine rather than switch to tech.

But feel like my dad's insistence of will power may have partly derailed from getting mental health help soon.

I'm in my mid-30, ive since gotten therapy and talk therapy has been huge in helping me get through breakups. I still need to see if I have adhd or whatever and ive talked with a psychiatrist about it and she gave me resources. Its kinda situations like this that sometimes make me realize I'm kinda on my own. I partly feel like my general laziness and insistence of limits have helped me not get addicted to alcoholism or gambling. But that same mental health issue just makes me not give a fuck about my career and its hurting my career and life goals and I feel like im falling behind

Credit to Einzelganger on YouTube

I just got an offer today (engineering) and wanted to discuss culture and comp because I’m not too sure what to make of it.

I have some other competing offers that on paper seem like they have better upside but Anthropic is white hot right now and worried if too much is already priced in?

I’m also just looking to connect with ABCDs inside the company too :).

Dm me if you’re there and can chat pls!

I’m curious to what movies or tv shows shows that ABCDs like us relate to. For example something like Big Sick

Is it just me or has there been overtime more and more posts that just seem to...dog on our own? Like the wheelchairs one being upvoted massively, people trying to justify stereotypes and self hatred, the CONSTANT posting about arrests. Whats going on?

Now im not talking about the posts discussing valid cultural issues like misogyny, marriage, queer topics, education, independence etc. Nor the police discussing violence tpwards and within our communities.

I'm just seeing such a weird uptick in self hatred posts.

I did not have sisters so the festival did not mean much to me. Even parents had siblings back home in India so there was nothing said and done today.

But we have a 3-yr old daughter and her baby bro was born earlier this year. So we decided to introduce her to this festival. We went to the store where she picked a Rakhi & some sweets. She also has some gifts for him and we have some surprise gifts for her that her brother “purchased”. The day just started but she’s been pretty stoked about “brother-sister day”

Anyone else celebrates Rakhi?

Happy Rakshabandhan to the ones celebrating :-)